I think the accessory I need most is a small bust - do minimiser bras help?

[DucklingDaisy]

I’ve got a Pinterest board full of outfit Inspo, and I’ve realised it’s mainly gamine looking French women with b-cups and tiny waists. I’m considering trying to lose a bit of weight anyway (I’m not overweight, would go from a 10 to an 8 maybe) but I’ve not been a B cup since I was 13, and breastfeeding has exacerbated the situation.

I’m aware of the existence of minimiser bras but I’ve never actually tried one. Could they be the key to not looking like a sack of spuds, and several times my actual size, in anything that doesn’t nip in at the waist, or do I just need to get realistic about dressing for my own body shape? I don’t really get to go shopping irl but I could order a few to try from M&S if it seems worth it.

I wouldn't. I've tried but they just spread everything out and make you look more flat-chested but chunkier. A nice uplifting half-cup bra is much more flattering, plus dressing for your figure.

I think they have more of a sports bra effect. I find a correctly fitting moulded full cup without padding is the best.

Your post makes me really sad OP.
Would you try different styles to see if you can live your shape? What about Stitchfix if you can’t shop irl?

It can be hard to accept the body shape we have (ignoring weight/size), as it does dictate what suits us best. I believe anyone can wear whatever they want, but I also understand that to look and feel good, some things look much better. Fit and colour can make a huge difference here. My androgynous shape (small boobs, no hips) means I look good in those gamine, parisienne styles, but I yearn to have the hips and bust to fill out fitted dresses or wear tailored trousers.

It’s okay (and indeed it’s human nature!) to want what we don’t have, but sometimes, we just have to accept the way we are. You shouldn’t change your already small size to try and fit a Pinterest aesthetic; buy the clothes that suit you as you are now.

It has helped me to explore making my own clothes, as things can be tailored to fit my body, but I appreciate not everyone has the time/resources/skill to do this!

OP I think the key is to make the Parisienne look work for your body and not your body for the look. I too love the Parisienne look and have many pins on my board for the look. Why not look at the way you can adapt the looks to work for your body and see what you have got.

Minimisers work for me and you can send it back for a refund if you don't like it. If you are going to wear a tight top, your minimised breasts will look squashed and wide/flat but if you are wearing looser tops like a shirt or a blouse then it looks fine.

Much as I’d love it to be true, minimiser bras do not suddenly reduce your bust to insignificant. The flesh has to go somewhere. A good fitting bra helps, one that projects forward but ultimately you just have to accept them (unless going for a reduction). There are thousands of us wrestling with this issue and big boobs are particularly challenging as you get older. Flat chested older ladies like my Nan look way classier. But we all want what we don’t have.

Minimiser bras have never worked for me. The breast tissue has to go somewhere. Genuinely, the options to reduce the appearance of breasts significantly are major weight loss or surgery. Please don’t try to change your body to fit a style. How can you adapt the style to suit the wonderful body that you already have? Can you find some mid-size bloggers or models to help you adapt your inspiration?

To be quite candid, it has to go somewhere. I’m a 36F, join me in being proud of what you have.

A well fitting supportive bra will make your waist look smaller. I have seen this so many times on Trinny and Susannah. The transformation is astonishing.

Be proud of your curves.