Plus size wedding guest for January

[Januarcelebration]

Hi all, my auntie (70) has just announced she is finally marrying her dp of 40 years. In January.

Its a small wedding at a registry office with a lunch at a posh restaurant afterwards. My aunty is stunning and very glamorous. As is her daughter in law.

I feel like a bit of a lump. I seem to have lost my style in the last few years. Between the pandemic and my mum (my aunties sister) dying last year, I haven’t been out anywhere in 3 years. I have put 2 stone on which seems to be on my middle and become a bit of a recluse. I have no idea how to dress my body. I have been actively avoiding going anywhere because I hate how I look. I did used to have an hour glass shape, but my waist seems to have, mainly, disappeared

My Auntie wouldn’t actually care if I turned up in a potato sack. But I want to look nice, so that I don’t have the anxiety about going. Or not as much.

I have taken losing my mum really badly and almost 12 months on I am still devastated and my Aunty has been a pillar of strength and support. I really want to go and enjoy and look good.

Can anyone give any tips for my shape or shop recommendations?

Thank you, will take a look.

I have spoke to my friend about the wedding and, briefly, about how I feel. Although she knows it’s been a hard year, I don’t think she knew how bad I have been. And I mentioned the threads.

She is insisting on taking me for coffee and looking at all your suggestions together. I would have usually just asked her to come here. But I think it’s time I started making small steps to go out.

The wedding and writing this thread has made me kind of realise how low I have been. I really need to start making small changes. I don’t recognise myself and that’s half the problem.

Thank you all so much.

The first dress. The fitted one is stunning but wouldn't it require a waist? Wouldn't it just emphasise a bigger tummy? Asking for me 😖

Thank you. I may not be quite as horrifying as I feel. I have always had a tendency to be quite down on myself.

Ohh I haven’t been in bravissimo for years. I did really like their bras. Thank you

The trouble is that model, while gorgeous, is not a very average shape. I would expect the actual dress to create the illusion of a waist with the ruching (which also disguises the tummy) and emphasize the boobs because of the neckline. But the only way to know is to try it. It might be terrible but that wouldn't be because YOU were terrible. It would be because the dress doesn't do what I think it does.

I am about same size and shoe as you and I wore a Scarlett and Jo dress to a recent wedding. It was comfy and I felt great in it.

I am a size 18 and very apple shaped. I find shift styles flatter most. Just Google shift dress and you will find loads.

Agree phase 8 is good for flattering styles. They have a lot of glitzy glam stuff in at the moment. And at 5ft 8 you shouldn't have an issue that much of it seems to be aimed at taller people.

I'm a similar shape and wore this to a recent wedding reception www.newlook.com/uk/womens/clothing/dresses/ax-paris-plum-v-neck-short-flutter-sleeve-belted-pleated-midi-dress/p/846394765

Short, floaty sleeves are far more flattering on me than tighter or long sleeves, balances out my boobs. It's at the lower end of your budget but New Look have a lot of similar midi dresses at the moment- I would have chosen this other one but wasn't in stock in my size:
www.newlook.com/uk/womens/clothing/dresses/pink-mark-making-satin-pleated-midi-wrap-dress/p/843672079

If they’re in budget, the Bombshell dresses are fabulously flattering. I had one for our daughter’s wedding and have never had so many compliments. I don’t have an especially toned abdomen.

John Lewis used to offer free consultations with a personal shopper (for want of a better word), I've done these a few times, and they were great. Totally non-judgemental, very helpful, and tailored to your budget. And no obligation to buy anything. Is that something you would consider?

@ApolloandDaphne thank you. Scarlett and jo seem very well liked.
@hellsbells99 i will look up shift dresses thank you

@PoppyBird They are both lovely.

@CaronPoivre thata really good to know. There’s some lovely stuff on their website.

@cloudjumper yes i would consider it. I assumed at my size they would struggle. But that’s probably just me having a downer on myself

The key to getting something great is to try things on even if you think they'll be horrible! You'll be surprised what suits you!

I love the shape of some of these dresses, but would be a bit careful with Velvet as I always think it adds another ten pounds. And satin/ anything shiny tends to show pantylines. I would look for something a bit more floaty.

Boden are good for ordering online because they list the measurements of every single item. So you can check if the waistline is right before ordering.

Similar size and age here, just a couple of inches taller :)

Having been mean about velvet... I would say that the Somerset dress from Anthropologie might work. I had them cotton summer version, but the velvet looks amazing too. Comes in plus sizes. I found the XL marginally small as an 18, and the 1X amazing.

www.anthropologie.com/en-gb/shop/the-somerset-maxi-dress-velvet-edition?category=dresses&color=030&type=REGULAR&quantity=1

Some lovely frocks on this thread! I’ve let myself go these last few years and fairly recently bought something with bright colours and got lots of compliments. I realised I’ve been trudging along in bleh shades and trying to hide a bit.
There are some fantastic suggestions here from previous posters in terms of cut, but I think returning to your previously colourful style will also help. Don’t hide yourself, OP, get out there and shine on this beautiful occasion.

I’m the same age and size as you but an inch shorter, with fair skin and dark hair. I bought this dress for a party recently and got so many compliments. The colour is really striking.

It’s way under budget so you could splash out on nice accessories, hair, nails etc - maybe get your makeup done professionally.

www.next.co.uk/gl7622s10/p49965

Sorry, that links to the navy - I got it in cobalt blue.

@KentishMama I know what you mean about velvet but I think it depends on the colour and drape of the fabric. I do love velvet though. I just love looking at it and stroking it so I'm probably not very balanced in my view. That anthropologie dress you linked to is bloody gorgeous. It looks like it's made out of forest moss. I wish I had an occasion to wear it!

I think you're right about drapey soft velvet. But if it's tight... Urgh.

I would beware of anything sparkly or sequinny in January.
But nice fabrics - velvet/fluffy jumper/heavy satin good shout
Are you going to be outside much?

With or without the belt I think this wool and velvet MaxMara confection would make a glorious wedding guest dress. Available in your size. Very slightly over budget but the sales will start soon.

I think something with long sleeves would be great - love the black Ganni and pleasantly surprised by how large they go in their sizing. Also liked the green Anthropology dress and the pink one above here. I’d clash it with red or leopard print shoes. I can’t really imagine floaty or flowery for January unless it’s a dark based floral or a floral embroidery ie an embroidered coat. I’m a size 18 and I get that feeling of not feeling good in your skin. I think if you make yourself head out for a brisk walk every day you’re going to start feeling a bit brighter…. I don’t mean exercise for weight loss but for well being. I enjoy listening to audio books or podcasts while I exercise. If I had to pick one department store for a try on I would want to pick Liberty but would realistically head to John Lewis. ( or do both…. But cafe in Liberty is far superior )

I’m a similar size. New look have some lovely dresses in at mo which would suit a wedding and won’t break the bank. Are very flattering. They do lots of plain colours but also nice patterned ones (depending on your taste). Do a search for pleated satin midi and lots will pop up. Can wear a blazer or cardie over the top.

pink new look

pink zig zag

Green leopard print

www.wallis.co.uk/curve-foil-print-keyhole-wrap-midi-dress/BYY04260.html

www.wallis.co.uk/curve-viscose-satin-wrap-belted-midi-dress/BYY05895.html