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Original poster

My teenager says...

17 replies

AntimemeticsDivision · 14/10/2022 22:44

Why does this keep being referenced as a thing?

When did adult women start taking style tips from teenagers? I occasionally ask my teen daughter, 'Which jacket?', but that's because she's into clothes as I am and I want her to feel involved. I'm not actually going to take her advice. She's 14, she knows about teen-fashion, which is great, but it's not really my desired reference-point.

And it's not about age, I certainly don't put an age -limit on any item of clothing, but I'm also not interested in what style of jeans of trainers teens are currently wearing. High fashion certainly isn't for teens, it's middle-aged and above women that have serious cash to spend on clothes, not 15 year-olds.

Teens want to blend in, they desire to ultimately conform with other teens. It's older women who have the confidence to be interesting with their style.

So why is anyone interested in what teens are wearing?

OP posts:
junebirthdaygirl · 14/10/2022 23:05

I think teens especially teen girls can be especially outspoken to their dms about their clothes. No other friend except possibly a sister would tell you straight out what they thought so l guess sometimes passing the teen dd test is high praise. When my dd was that age she would challenge me at times ..saying not those shoes etc..and it was a help to me. I wasn't looking to dress like a teen but she had an interest in me looking nice.

DramaAlpaca · 15/10/2022 01:45

Absolutely. I'm 50-something and the last person I'd listen to on matters of style is a teenager.

Teens can do their thing, I do mine.

BlueKaftan · 15/10/2022 02:01

I was in town the other day and saw a group of teen girls, dressed on trend, and I thought (gently) “They’re going to regret those outfits in 20 years just like my friends and I did!”

EllaPaella · 15/10/2022 08:55

This phrase is mostly used on Mumsnet when someone is trying to put down someone else's style choice.
I totally agree that most grown women will have no desire to emulate the high street trends of teenagers.

TheOGCCL · 15/10/2022 09:22

It’s because we live in an ageist society and (some) women feel they need to do anything they can to show they are still ‘young’. You only have to read the amount of ‘is this frumpy?’ threads. The irony being that teenagers are effectively wearing some incredibly ‘frumpy’ clothes. Most of them can get away with it, the rest don’t care, and each generation naturally seeks to distance itself even if all they are really doing is returning to the trends of their mothers when they were the same age.

thebabessavedme · 15/10/2022 09:23

I laughed at myself the other day when I saw a teen in one of those crop tops and bum wobbly trackies and all I could think was 'you're going to get a chill in your kidneys my girl' Good lord, I reminded myself of my nana who always went on at me to 'put a vest on' Grin

So, no, I don't look for teen style, my bum wobbles enough without having soft trackies stuck up my crack and frankly, I think that a crop top would have me killed off with the flu pretty quickly.

J0y · 15/10/2022 09:25

yeh I agree with you. I don't want to look like I'm following fashion rules.
I did explain that to my teenager. Not sure she 100% gets it!

Afterfire · 15/10/2022 09:28

I think fashion is still very ageist. Young and trendy is still a “thing”. It’s perfectly possible to look stylish and beautiful without being fashionable as such, but I think people reference teens / young 20s opinions as a point of knowing what’s “in”. Sad really but can’t see it changing any time soon unfortunately.

My dd is 19 and whilst -at 42- I don’t want to dress exactly like her I do value her opinion. So many people my age grow old before their time. I don’t want to be presumed to be 60 when I’m 40 something. That doesn’t mean to say I have a problem with my age - I don’t, I’m happy to look mid 40s, but I don’t want to look older than I am.

PalacePaper · 15/10/2022 10:27

A blogger I sometimes read who is aimed at 40+ women does this sometimes and I always find it a bit bemusing - why would her target group be interested in which socks her sons say they should be wearing with trainers?!

Sandysandwich · 15/10/2022 11:02

My mum always asked my opinion when I was a teenager and still does now.
Its mostly because I was a girl and if she asked my brothers or dad if domething looks good they would all say 'yeah' regardless.
But if I said she looked brilliant in something she would feel confident in an outfit and she trusted me to say maybe those trousers would go better with your green top.
I thought it was just an objective pair of eyes not that she was trying to follow any teen style.

We always dressed nothing alike anyway- I was an 'alternative' teen but I still knew what clothes would look nice on my Mum- I wasn't encouraging her to wear fishnets and massive combat boots. She was a blue jeans and floaty blouse lady who like florals- just because it was nothing like my style didn't mean I couldn't help her pick nice clothes. She would do the same for me, and I would always ask her opinion on my nightclub outfits- even if she would rather drop dead than wear them- she could still tell what looked good on me.

Sandysandwich · 15/10/2022 11:05

But also she wouldnt ask another random teenager what looks nice, same as I wouldnt ask a random 40 year old woman. It was because we knew each other and knew each others styles well. So she would ask 'her' teenager but not a teen focussed magazine for example.

psuedocream3 · 15/10/2022 12:14

Teens certainly don't know their style yet and can have fun playing with stuff which isn't necessarily flattering, or because fits in with the current trend amogst their peers... we were all young once and did that. But realistically I'm not going to dress like my teen.

That said if that's what you like and feel comfortable in, go for it. it would be a boring world if we dressed the same.

KalaniM · 15/10/2022 14:31

No. Teens are often severely limited in their perceptions by peer pressure and current marketing. Rare that they have a seasoned eye that works outside their short duration of exposure.

XingMing · 15/10/2022 15:45

I have always valued my DS's (23 now, so not a teen) opinion on clothes, because we have similar taste and fashion sense. He's very visual, understands what's contemporary and enjoys peacocking.

SierraSapphire · 15/10/2022 16:05

I said this on a thread (I asked DD whether I looked like I was going gardening). For me it's just that my DD is more likely to be with me when I dress or try on things, or the only person I send Snapchat pictures to, or around to be bothered during the day, so it's partly just proximity.

TheLassWiADelicateAir · 15/10/2022 20:48

TheOGCCL · 15/10/2022 09:22

It’s because we live in an ageist society and (some) women feel they need to do anything they can to show they are still ‘young’. You only have to read the amount of ‘is this frumpy?’ threads. The irony being that teenagers are effectively wearing some incredibly ‘frumpy’ clothes. Most of them can get away with it, the rest don’t care, and each generation naturally seeks to distance itself even if all they are really doing is returning to the trends of their mothers when they were the same age.

To be fair , I don't think "frumpy" is an ageist insult. Plenty of uniforms are "frumpy" regardless of the age of the person wearing them. Same with "dowdy"

It's the "looks like something my grandmother would wear" / "even my granny wouldn't be seen dead in that " comments which are ageist and irritating.

lljkk · 15/10/2022 20:56

why is anyone interested in what teens are wearing?

because it's obviously hideous & I am baffled why they choose THAT.
Or maybe just my daughter.

Ok, not really, but I am baffled at things she likes. That anyone likes fashion, tbh. They seem to suit her. Don't actually look bad.

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