What would you wear to a 'non-funeral'

[AssignedSlytherinAtBirth]

My friend died last week and her (adult) dch have said she didn't want a funeral, so they are just going to have her cremated without any sort of service. Later that day friends and relatives are invited to the house for food and drink. I asked her DD if there's a dress code, and said I wouldn't want to wear pink if everyone was wearing black, but she said to wear pink if I wanted to! The DD is pretty laid back and I don't think she'd mind whatever people wore, but do you think people will wear black? I could wear work-type dark trousers and a jacket. Or a dress that's basically black but has coloured flowers. What would you wear?

I would wear something joyful that made me feel confident - the organiser has given you clear instructions that black is not necessary so your dress sounds nice

Sorry, I meant of course to add I am sorry for your loss

I would wear something that reminded me of the person, something I would have worn if meeting them to go somewhere nice. Not jeans but anything else.

I'm sorry you have lost your friend

I would wear ‘office wear’, whether dress or trousers. Ie. Something smart-ish. I probably would stick to more sombre colours - black, navy etc.

When I'm told not black I tend to opt for a navy dress plus more colourful scarf which I can remove if most others are in black

Do you have an outfit that reminds you of your friend or did she buy you something you could wear?

I have a friend who bought me a gorgeous scarf so if she died I would wear it to her funeral. It would be a lovely mark of respect.

Actually the DD has said pink is ok. She hasn’t said no one is wearing black snd she won’t know that I guess. I wouldn’t dress in work clothes. Navy always looks smart. Or dark green or burgundy. I wouldn’t wear splashy floral but I would wear dark ditsy floral. I only occasionally wear a black coat to a funeral but if I do, I wear a dark dress under it. So you could wear any darker colour or grey. Wear a scarf or coloured necklace.

I’d wear something that evoked a happy memory of my friend. Like an outfit she helped me pick or a colour she liked or something. I wouldn’t go sombre or sad as it doesn’t sound like that kind of a day.
sorry for your loss

OK thank you all. The idea of wearing a colourful scarf that could be removed is a good one. I think this is meant to be a celebration, and will be in the garden if possible, so maybe going towards garden party vibe. But people are traditionalists, aren't they? I imagine some will wear dark colours even if not black. Anyway, I'll ditch the office wear/jacket combo as too formal.

It sounds not dissimilar to what we did for my mum and we definitely didn't want people in black (unless they were most comfortable wearing it). We wanted a celebration of her life and so brighter, cheerier clothes suited that better. A lot of her friends admired her style so wanted to wear something 'a bit her' for the occasion. The idea of wearing a scarf she bought you, or a top she always complimented is a really lovely one.

Just wear whatever you have that is smart-ish that you will feel comfortable in.

I do this sort of thing as well.