How do I look like a yummy mummy rather than a frumpy mummy? Help!

[TheSmallestOneWasMadeline]

I cringed as I was writing that title but I need HELP! Turned up for a viewing of DD's new nursery school this week and was left feeling like a sack of spuds compared to the other Mums dropping their kids off.

I think 2.5 years of either being in lockdown or at home on maternity leave have completely ridded me of any fashion sense that I once had (which wasn't a lot in all honesty). I work from home a lot now so instead of my nice workwear I'm just in leggings and cheap tops/cardigans most of the time but I'd quite like to put together a new wardrobe of essentials that work for my new life I.e. nursery runs/playgroups/coffee with friends rather than my old blend of very formal for work and glam for going out out.

Could someone suggest some shops/items I should be looking at to achieve that nice, put together but casual mum look please? I'm honestly common as muck but the nursery is in quite a 'posh' area so you all must know the look I'm after 😀

Thanks!!

My uniform is dress, tights, boots and leather jacket or oversize jumper, leggings/skinny jeans, trainers and gilet. I generally feel confident on the school run- I always wear v light make up and do my hair as I go straight to work and speak in front of lots of people so need to look decent!

My dd has just started pre school.
The area is a mix and where the school is is quite posh compared to where I’m from.
Some of the mothers there are certainly different to me and are quite dressed up. Even the ones that don’t wear makeup or anything have really good clothes and buggies etc.
One of the grandmothers always looks very nice with cropped trousers, nice trainers and jumpers and expensive rain coats and her hair and skin is gorgeous but I’ve long since given up wondering how some women manage to pull that kind of look off …some people just have good taste and know how to dress but a big part is also that the clothes are deceptively expensive and possibly beauty treatments/ really good hairdresser…I really don’t know. Even the little details like designer sunglasses. Manicures. When you put it all together it looks very fancy to me but to them it’s just normal.
Basically they may put in a bit more time and effort but they also have a shit load more money to work with than I do 🤷‍♀️
Anyway, I’d say forget about trying to copy other mothers unless you really want to and think you can pull it off. I know I can’t 😄Just try to find comfortable clothes that suit you a bit better, keep your hair and eyebrows tidy, stick on a bit of makeup if you feel like it and hold your head up.
You’re there for the kids, not a fashion parade.

Thank you for all the replies I feel like I have a bit of a plan now. I'm going to have a wardrobe purge over the weekend and send anything that doesn't fit or doesn't suit me to the charity shop.

I've ordered a pair of 'Mom' style jeans from Zara so thank you for the poster who suggested those. Seems appropriate and I really do like the style.

After that tho I thought rather than go all guns and blazing and buy tonnes I'd make a list which has the following on it:

[ ] Longline Black Gilet
[ ] Wool coat in neutral colour
[ ] Longline puffa coat in neutral colour
[ ] Leather jacket
[ ] Black trainers
[ ] White trainers
[ ] Good pair of black boots
[ ] Plain tees in neutral colours
[ ] Plain long sleeve tees in neutral
[ ] Jumpers in camel or oat colour (look at French connection)
[ ] Navy/white stripey tee
[ ] LEATHER look leggings (yes they are leggings still but I've seen so many on Pinterest now I've fallen in love and think they defo level up leggings!)

The irony is I'm sure I have some of these things in my wardrobe already somewhere.

Obviously I cant really afford to go buying everything on this list straight off the bat esp as I want good quality but I'm hoping I can work through it through the autumn/winter to get my basics and then add a few bits every year. Hurrah!

Personally I'd ditch black trainers from that list. I don't know why but I don't think they look good.

You have nailed mum boots. The best description ever! Thank you!

Cardigans - there were some in the Times Style mag this weekend
www.freepeople.com/uk/cardigans/

Glad you feel more organised now OP.

I agree with pp though - I wouldn’t prioritise black trainers.

I absolutely agree that cheap leggings look cheap and have come here purely to sing Amazon's praises.

I'm usually asos, Zara, Nike for sports, etc but had seen so many threads raving about Amazon leggings I had to give them a go.... game changer.

I got ovruns and they are fab. Super thick so can't see a hint of underwear (not even a line, never mind the actual pants) and they stay up perfectly. They were cheap but feel similar to the fabletics/SB ones I've had on the past.

I've come to the conclusion sadly that I would look ten times better if I just lost the two stone that have been bothering me for years. Jeans and a t shirt just look that little bit more chic when you're slim unfortunately.

This

Loving the idea about sportswear - I will Google Sweaty Betty!

Blimey, Sweaty Betty is expensive - but I do like the idea of sportswear. I'm reading this thread with the view of someone who WFH most days, so I want comfy, casual clothes that are still fine if I want to nip out at lunch time to run an errand. I don't want to get changed to go out.

Don't wear skinnies!

I love autumn, I wear a velvet fitted jacket (in black or dark purple) a white shirt or fitted jumper and dark jeans with knee high flat boots. I’ve been asked quite a few times where I got the jacket or the boots and have nice complements. And if I’m in a rush… activewear! Make it look like you’re busy 🤣 whatever you choose I think confidence is key

Sometimes it's about the clothing you can't really see. So get some pants that don't create a VPL and a decent bra that does a good deal of hoicking the boobs up.

Then don't make the mistake of wearing clothes too tight.

TKMaxx are great for Sweaty Betty style leggings at a really good price, I agree they're very flattering and comfy.

Love your list OP!

My best advice is to ignore fashion and dress to compliment your shape. Also find colours that make your skin tone pop and find a hairstyle that is easy to manage whilst still looking ‘done’.

It tends to be the women who master this that look well put together and stylish.

I think sometimes the uniform of very basic colours can look really not great if you don't have the budget for the expensive high street stores. Somehow it only seems to work on the glossy swishy haired women who always have time for some tasteful makeup and have done their hair.

I would personally figure out what colours and styles suit you and then dress in ways that make you feel amazing even if they aren't the uniform of other mums you see on the school run.

I wear a lot of black and deep colours like bottle green, dark red and like soft fabrics like velvet and corduroy. My hair is a very dark red so I find those colours and fabrics really compliment my hair colour, and with some big statement dangly earrings, a good wool or velvet coat and DMs or Fly London boots creates a style that I love and feel confident in. It's not "on trend" but I try to incorporate elements of what's currently in the shops in terms of the style of jeans or fabrics.

For me a bit of concealer, mascara and perfume and a good pair of earrings makes me feel confident on the school run, even if I haven't time to do my hair properly or have just chucked something on.

This time of year for the oh crap I've overslept days I've got a collection of good quality leggings from Amazon that I chuck on with a basic black strappy dress and an oversized cardigan. Chuck some good boots on the bottom and a pair of sunglasses and I look passable without the leggings and T-shirt I just grabbed in a rush vibe. A denim or leather jacket instead of the cardigan smartens any outfit up.

Love the list OP. I find my black trainers soooo useful. I have these.

I find midi dresses are really useful for a throw on / no brainer option and I get compliments when wearing them more than any thing else. I'm planning to get this one for Autumn as think it would work with aforementioned black trainers, black chunky boots, thick tights, a jumper over, jacket over, black long sleeved thermal top or a polo neck under to up the warmth for winter. Also bare legged with white trainers for spring.

I also love Fatface sway slim legged jeans. Thick fabric but with just enough stretch to be really comfy and a more modern style than skinnies but suit me better than Mom jeans. Also nice rolled up.There are a few options in the sale too.

I think nicely styled hair, simple jewellery, and a smart looking bag always elevates an outfit even if you're in shorts and flip flops.

And a denim shirt can be really versatile especially one long enough to wear with leggings. I really like denim shirt, white t under, leather leggings, boots/trainers look.

This advice is all so helpful, so thanks all.

Will definitely look into all the leggings suggestions as tbh I cant bear the idea of lounging around the house in jeans so they will need to feature somehow. Some good quality thick ones will be ideal.

Having good hair is definitely a problem for me. I've got the annoying hair type that is fine but absolutely masses of it. It never holds a style and usually looks flat and meh. It can look pretty good in a messy bun though so I'll practice some of those I think.

Good list OP, but you'll need to make sure everything you buy actually suits you - like t-shirt shape and length. Also, before you start splashing out on the items, I'd recommend making a list of potential outfits you can make from them, just to make sure you'd actually wear it all. That might help you identify any other gaps and how to fill them, as well. And don't forget accessories.

Don't know what your leggings budget is but it's finally cool enough for me to wear my thick Wolford ones today and they are so comfy and smart. They were about £100 though.

I agree. I'd rather choose some decent boots (?) instead of trainers. Like chunky sole ones in beige.

Great idea @WowStarsWow I will do that!

I love Mango for expensive looking basics that are actually quite reasonable. I tend to wear jeans (straight leg, not skinny) and fitted tops in neutral or single colours. Usually wear with adidas sneakers. Mango also do great knitwear!

I'm currently on mat leave with a 5mo so don't have much time for hair and makeup, but I do feel more 'put together' when I've used a touch of concealer under my eyes, some mascara and an eyebrow pomade. Hair wise I use A LOT of volumising dry shampoo, which also helps disguise the post partum hair loss haha.

For reference I'm mid thirties!