No idea what suits me anymore

[noideawhatsuits]

Hi - looking for some help with clothes. I'm officially Middle aged now - 45 - and feel after years of looking young for my age that I now definitely look it 😩 and since having kids i haven't really a clue what suits me anymore.
Im Scottish and v fair (but not freckly) I get quite rosy cheeked sometimes, originally a kind of golden mid blond, but now if I went natural I'd be at least 50% white, but I dye it and it's currently looking waaaay to dark for me (but that's a whole other story!) but clothes wise - I just have no idea what to wear now.

I think it's embarrassingly down to being a bit immature in some ways, as I see people younger than me who dress older and I feel that I could never wear that kind of stuff as I'd feel like I was dressing up? Dresses are soemthing I wear to weddings etc, never day to day. I barely wear makeup, but should probably start as my skin used to be great, however peri-menopause seems to have made me look paler and more prone to rashes/flushing.

I used to have a decent figure, and I'm still a size 10-12, but my waist has thickened considerably and I have a lovely c-section shelf below a wobbly baggy skinned tummy that makes me v self conscious. I used to be a def pear shape - small shoulders, small chest, thin waist and curvy bum, but now I'm not sure what I am? Possibly more rectangle?

What should I be wearing that will flatter me? I feel I look drained in most of my clothes now (mostly dark colours) I bought a pink t-shirt today for the first time ever and colour wise I think it helps brighten me up a bit, but not sure of the shape. I used to wear fitted tops, that showed my waist, but now I want to hide it. Any tips? Help! Thanks!

Just a bump for you 😊

I’d recommend a colour and style consultation. Not cheap but then you have the tools for the rest of your life. Pale people in particular need to wear the right colours to avoid looking ill.

@Janetstreetwater thank you!

I'm sure you're not a rectangle shape op

What helped me was laying out every item of clothing, shoes and accessories I owned and pick out everything which I felt good in every time I wore it.

So anything that didn't fit, was washed out and worn, was a dodgy colour for my complexion or was just a bugger to wear, was given to charity.

Then I looked at the clothes that were left and worked out what I actually enjoyed wearing and set about buying a few carefully chosen items which suited my style.

For me it is mainly expensive denim. sweatshirts and trainers. I like block colour, 100% cotton and well cut stuff.

My wardrobe is 30 pieces including shoes and bags now and it is so much easier to feel good about what I wear.

I am a bit younger than you but was recently feeling similar. Very uninspired, not confident with what I was wearing, wearing a variation on the same thing over and over (skinny jeans and a jumper - fine but boring).

Last winter I paid for a consultation with Styled by Susie, and honestly it has been brilliant. It wasn't super expensive, as its just done online - sending in some photos and answering a questionnaire. I paid about £60 (there are cheaper ones available), as I wanted the style personality and the specific jeans recommendations with links. In addition it included and analysis of my shape and colouring, with suggestions as to what to wear.

I know some people don't like it, and I do sort of understand that, but for me it has been brilliant. My wardrobe has a lot less clothes in it now, but I love everything I wear. And I wear different styles.

Something I realised recently is that I think I was always scared of showing any personality with my clothing. It's taken a few months but now I'm not. I don't even follow the rules all the time any more, I wear things that make me feel happy. I would still dig out my analysis though if I was looking for something for an event where I was not confident but needed to look good.

If you don't want to do anything like this the suggestion above to look at the clothes you love wearing and think about what else you might like, is a good one. But I think I needed more.