Embarrassing addiction to makeup and major insecurities.

[humanpotato]

I've never shared this with anyone as it's something I find extremely embarrassing and it tortures me.

I have a huge addiction to wearing makeup, predominately foundation... I have been with my boyfriend for 7 going on 8 years and he's never seen my natural face I understand that this is more to do with self esteem issues rather than an addiction but it correlates.

Admittedly I hide my face from him embarrassing as it sounds if I'm ever "exposed" bare faced to him, it goes as far to the point where most nights for the last 7 years I have slept in my makeup just so I can wake up still wearing it just to wash it off in the morning then quickly put a layer of foundation on, I don't mind being seen as long I have that first layer of foundation on, granted I won't leave the house properly unless I've at least got concealer, contour and powder on top... only recently he's started sleeping downstairs because he snores and he wakes our 5month baby up so I've began removing my makeup to go to sleep at night... to go more into how bad this goes when I gave birth I stayed in hospital for four days and I would apply my makeup regularly through the night knowing I was going to be regularly popped in on by nurses, then when I could go home I would be up at 4/5am doing a full face of makeup before my baby would wake.(this was when my bf was sharing the bed at the time). My bf took us to a spa once and he wants to go again and to me this sounds like a nightmare as the steam room etc takes away makeup (the first time we went I made sure to layer my foundation) I realise how bad all this is for my skin btw and let it steam into my pores...

When we first got together and I started sleeping over I would hide foundation at the side of the bed with a mirror and quickly apply it under the covers before he would wake up.... now I don't actually have "major" skin issues, I'm not a massively spotty person but it's something that's gotten worse over the years and grew as an insecurity.

I just don't know what to do, I want to be comfortable and happy in my own skin... it's exhausting. My boyfriend always tells me makeup doesn't matter and tells me I'm beautiful and loves me regardless etc but it's not that issue when you've got such a big insecurities which has just been fed for years...

I want to change, this is so embarrassing. Im a bridesmaid next year and I'm dreading being bare faced to get my makeup done, and on the hen do we're going to a spa and I know for a fact my sister is going to make comments about me wearing makeup to a spa which in itself is embarrassing because I know that it's ridiculous...

Anyway, I'm turning to mums net to hopefully get some advice and help on my complexion and skin/routine? Any advice or recommendations would be really appreciated because I do want to grow and learn to be happy without it all... but I don't know how to describe my skin now, I've clearly ruined it from the over use of living in makeup and damaged it. I have a very dull lifeless completion, I would say it's very uneven toned, extremely pale, I have black heads, and I've began to notice my pores worsening and looking large even under makeup... The only thing going well for me is lack of spots or when I do get them they're short lived I have a few small ones at the moment but this always happens when I stop sleeping in makeup and I read that this is because your skin is so used to the chemicals it reacts in some way (something like that anyway) but my skin clearly just hasn't been looked after at all... and I don't know where to start, I'm 24, I've only just recently started using primer, I have never really had a skin care routine or anything. I know so many beautiful girls who share themselves going for facials and their skin is glowing you'd think they had makeup on but it's all natural! How can I start rescuing my skin so I could maybe one day be happy to skip the foundation on days where it's not necessary such as just sitting in the house etc... (please don't suggest I just pack it in because the anxiety I have around all this it's just not realistic, I'm not near that point yet but I want to be)

Also I have wore fake tan for years and I'm trying to be happy to have my milk bottle legs out this summer without needing it is there's any good products that make pale uneven skin a bit "nicer" all I use is baby Johnson's nighttime moisturiser, I don't know if it's in my head but I'm sure I have fake tan stuck within my body's pores which makes my skin look poor ....

This may all sound very self absorbed but this journey for me brings on big anxieties and I just want to face what's been a huge weight of insecurities for years... it might sound daft to a lot of people I understand that but for me it's a struggle.

Your anxiety comes through in your post. I think you need to my off the foundation and embrace some lighter products while implementing a skincare routine. There’s loads of advice on here, but ensuring your skin is cleaned every night and is getting some moisture will definitely help. I used to wear heavy foundation daily but I stopped firing covid and now only wear the heavy stuff for soccial occasions and wear much lighter products like BB cream for every day use.

Have you considered using a gradual fake tan in your face to wean you off wearing make in bed?

Gradual fake tan will even out your complexion and might help you feel more confident.

Hi! Please don't be embarrassed. I used to feel like you do though not as extremely.
What's helped me is watching YouTube 'tutorials' of how to wear less makeup, especially foundation. Also videos of how to feel more confident in your own skin. I've found that if my brows are done and I've got mascara on, I still look put together! I think I always used to think that no foundation meant no makeup at all, maybe because it's what we usually put on first. It's taken a long time but I'm happy without makeup now. I still wear foundation for work or if going somewhere (so most days!) but don't get anxiety about it which has changed my life!

m.feelunique.com/p/St-Tropez-Self-Tan-Purity-Vitamins-Face-Serum-50ml?utm_source=awin&utm_medium=affiliate&utm_campaign=The+Independent&awinid=22773&awc=22773_1650227155_7e72bc2de8a78fbb9fa9da892b0d82e1

@ElenaSt

Gradual fake tan will even out your complexion and might help you feel more confident.

Good idea! Do you know of any good ones?

Thanks x

@PartyPlan

Your anxiety comes through in your post. I think you need to my off the foundation and embrace some lighter products while implementing a skincare routine. There’s loads of advice on here, but ensuring your skin is cleaned every night and is getting some moisture will definitely help. I used to wear heavy foundation daily but I stopped firing covid and now only wear the heavy stuff for soccial occasions and wear much lighter products like BB cream for every day use.

I'll have a look into some lighter products as I always go for heavy wearing foundation. I do sometimes try a lightweight but then I end up just ending up putting more on, I'm terrible honestly.

Thanks x

@User65412

Hi! Please don't be embarrassed. I used to feel like you do though not as extremely. What's helped me is watching YouTube 'tutorials' of how to wear less makeup, especially foundation. Also videos of how to feel more confident in your own skin. I've found that if my brows are done and I've got mascara on, I still look put together! I think I always used to think that no foundation meant no makeup at all, maybe because it's what we usually put on first. It's taken a long time but I'm happy without makeup now. I still wear foundation for work or if going somewhere (so most days!) but don't get anxiety about it which has changed my life!

I'll definitely have a look on YouTube I never really thought about looking into videos but there's probably loads as I know there's probably a lot of people out there who rely on makeup for comfort.

I'm glad it helped you! Hopefully it can help me too. Thank you xx

[quote ElenaSt]m.feelunique.com/p/St-Tropez-Self-Tan-Purity-Vitamins-Face-Serum-50ml?utm_source=awin&utm_medium=affiliate&utm_campaign=The+Independent&awinid=22773&awc=22773_1650227155_7e72bc2de8a78fbb9fa9da892b0d82e1[/quote]
Great! Thank you! Someone's actually told me about this before. I look forward to trying it x

Tanning is the escape from foundation it worked for me. Also summer is the right time for this. Get sone gradual fake tan just the summer body ones will do the trick on your legs etc.

I would pick small things to focus on like brows and lashes. I feel sone enough for every day if I have eyebrow pencil and mascara on. Under eye concealer at the most.

Can you focus on building a really lovely skincare routine for yourself so it's more about having a pamper and getting back in touch with your skin - rather than seeing it as something to hide?

You need to properly cleanse your face, an oil or balm is best to remove makeup - lots of affordable options. Inkey List do a fab one.

If you want to help with glow take a look at adding in a vitamin c serum in the morning.

The Ordinary do lovely face oils you can apply after moisturiser which feel luxurious.

Maybe watch some James Welsh or Cassandra Bankson videos to give you some inspiration.

I'm sure it will be such a shock at first but I really hope that gradually you will learn to appreciate your face and it will be so liberating not to feel such anxiety.