Dress for 13 year old

[AngelsWithSilverWings]

DD is 13 ( almost 14) and has been invited to a party where apparently all the girls are wearing a similar type of dress. ( strappy , mini slip style ) they are all apparently wearing trainers with the dresses.

She has chosen and bought a dress that is extremely clingy , extremely cheap thin material and very short.

I don't have a problem with the length but it just looks so cheap and badly made and although she has ordered a size 4 I think a 6 would drape better but she is refusing to order a bigger size saying she doesn't want a baggy dress.

I am clueless about teen fashion and two years of lockdown mean I've not really seen what her friends wear.

What would your 13/14 year old wear and where would you shop?

DD has sent me a link to a site called Oh Polly and ,to be frank, I was horrified that she would want to wear anything from there.

Please help!

I have a thirteen year old. They all wear skimpy tight shirt dresses, usually about £10 from SHEIN. They all wear with trainers. They all look exactly the sam with long straight hair 😉

Short not shirt

Yep, same. Short, highly flammable fabric, skin tight, strappy....with trainers and long straight hair. Not my style at all but they look lovely in their way and it's a kind of uniform I think, they all like to look the same I think at that age.

I was thirteen in the eighties. My hair was highly flammable 😀

I'm 25 and I know a lot of people my age that wear dresses from oh Polly. Personally not a fan and wouldn't be seen dead in a dress like that..
but I have noticed all teens look the same, if it was the same as her friends I wouldn't have an issue but if it was obviously inappropriate then I wouldn't let her wear it.
Think it kinda depends on her body type too.

My 13 year old wears run and fly dinosaur dungarees and dresses and spark company t-shirts.

She may not be in the same school social circles as yours!

I have no idea, teenagers are weird.

Shein, boohoo, pretty little thing is pretty standard for that age with trainers

My 13 year old won't be seen dead in dress of any sort and neither will most of her friends.
But teen girls are herd animals and if that is what your dd's herd is wearing then she Will want to wear it as well.

Thank you for helping see that what she has chosen is normal for her age group . I was never into this kind of dress at that age. I was always more of a jeans and DMs girl.

@OakleyStreetisnotinChelsea your DD sounds cool.Mine is so desperate to fit in I just have to let her get on with I suppose.

I've ordered her another dress from PLT that looks a bit more substantial than the one she bought. Fingers crossed it looks ok. I couldn't see anything on Oh Polly that didn't look like lingerie!

She's a skinny , petite little thing and a late developer so these dresses made for fully grown women don't look quite right on her but she will not wear anything from a children's range.

Same sort of outfit here, usually dresses from Urban Outfitters.

It's normal for her age, just let her wear the one she chose.

All the same here. But makes it look a little better worn with trainers. All the kids wear them.

My 12 yo will wear a tshirt dress at a push but prefers jumpsuits. Always with trainers.

13 year olds are a law unto themselves when it comes to fashion sense. Mine wears black jeans, docs and flannel shirts, and if I let her a beanie - which you may think is fine, but we live in a tropical country with an average temperature in the high 20s

If your DD's friends are all going to the party in strappy dresses, I'd be inclined to let her but have a discussion about appropriate clothes for the context - so strappy dress ok for a party, not for going to the supermarket. She may still want to wear something strappy to the supermarket but its like everything, its teaching them to fine the right balance. Push it too hard and you'll end up with a girl who carries a bag with the dress she's going to wear stuffed in it, while she leaves the house in a 'mother approved' dress.

@NameChangeNameShange thanks , the second dress is also one she has chosen. I told her I had no problem with the style of the dress she originally bought but I'd prefer something that looked more expensive.

I've come round to her wearing whichever she prefers.

DH's sister used to leave the house and then get changed out of her parent approved outfit so I know what you mean!

I was never in the tribe that wanted to dress like this - I refused to wear skirts or dresses all through my teenage years.

We were at a Bat Mitzvah last weekend for a 12 year old girl. Every girl was in a tight, clingy and very short dress (usually black) with shoe string straps and white trainers. They didn’t look at all sexy but were all very happy and having fun.

If it’s a bar/bat mitzvah she will fit right in! Short dresses or body suits with trainers are the norm. BooHoo, Shein etc all seem to be the shop of choice which isn’t surprising as some kids will go to dozens of these parties over 2 years.

Think it kinda depends on her body type too.

No it doesn’t. She’s 13.

Well done for letting her crack on OP. They just want to have fun with fashion and fit in with each other.

Thanks again everyone. I was so shocked when she first showed me what she wanted to wear and then when I saw her in the dress I felt uncomfortable seeing her wearing something so grown up.

When the pandemic started she was 11 and happy to wear whatever pretty dress I had ordered for her from John Lewis or Debenhams. There have been no parties over the last two years and suddenly my they are staring up again and in my head I'm still expecting her to draw like she did two years ago!

She started at a new school last September and has just started to be included in stuff so desperately wants to fit in.

This dress arrived today and is so much nicer and she loves it with the puffy sleeves. It's a bit see through so I've ordered a strapless body con slip to go under it. She's happy and that's the main thing.