Hiding asymmetry?

[fedup2221]

Last time I had a boyfriend was 5 years ago this year. I am in my early thirties now and aware of fertility etc and I really want to date again.

However, I'm really unhappy with the way I look at the moment and as a consequence don't feel my confidence is at all where it should be to be strong enough to put myself out to date again. I actually don't feel attractive enough at all.

My eye and brow has become droopy over the past few years and I don't know why. I think I have always had a slight degree of asymmetry in my face, but it was not noticeable. Suddenly I look like I different person. Can you really age this much in 2 years??

This is the worst thing, because I am embarrassed about my facial appearance, to the extent that I don't look at people properly when I talk to them anymore as I just feel ugly. I cut a fringe in to try and hide the asymmetry (which doesn't even suit me btw) and I feel that I need to have surgery at a cost of approx £5k before I feel better. I really can't afford this and am considering taking out a loan at the bank to pay for it. Basically one side looks fine and the other I look horrible and its something I feel is ruining my quality of life.

I look like my face is falling on one side and I hate it. I have spoken to opticians, doctors, wondering if its a problem with my eye or brow or if I have ptosis. I am told I don't, that they can see what I mean, but that it is just my face. I have been for consultations for botox and both refused me on the grounds they didn't think it would make much difference.

But as I say, I can't really afford to put it right.

Is a fringe even the best way to hide this or it could it actually draw MORE attention to the asymmetry?

Long story short, I hate my 'new' asymmetrical face and don't know what I can do about it. I'm miserable.

Can I ask is it the right eye that’s bothering you? I had the same thing but much later than you, about 45 ish I thinks it’s to do with that side getting more sun exposure when driving, sitting in trains etc

Try botox. I have it for ptosis. It helps make it less pronounced.

I could have written this 5 years ago, I felt so self conscious. Then my eyesight started failing and I needed to start wearing glasses.
They hugely disguise my facial asymmetry, and I always choose dark frames in fashionable shapes, which draw attention to them rather than to my wonky eye/brow.
I feel so much more confident.

I would have thought Botox would help but I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think. Hardly anyone has a symmetrical face - embrace it as quirkiness.
If you really don’t like it, try Botox to see if it helps or consider a micro current device like Nu Face to lift the eye brow. I use Nu Face and as an experiment one month only used it on one side of my face and there was a very visible difference. If you only used it on one side it may correct it?
Grow your fringe out if you don’t like it/suit you, bo point having two things you don’t like about yourself.
You’re only young - please don’t let this hinder you meeting someone - maybe look into some body image counselling to give you more confidence - I promise no-one else will notice it as much as you do. I have a very pronounced tear trough on one side only and absolutely HATE it but too scared to get fillers and whenever I mention it to friends, they look at me like I’m mad.

You could also see a makeup artist to see if there is any makeup wizardry that could even you out like thinner eyeliner on one side etc ( have to admit I have no idea about this but I’m sure I’ve seen YT videos on correcting asymmetric features?)

Be kind to yourself - we’re our own worst enemies sometimes.

@Flammkuchen I hope you don’t mind me @ing you but could you tell me more about the Botox? Was it recommended over surgery? It’s just I have ptosis but no-one’s ever suggested Botox as a solution.

OP you have my sympathy as I have ptosis and also quite an asymmetric face so I feel your pain. I haven’t worked a solution yet though!

Does it look better if you pull the skin of your brow up with your fingers? If so, a thread lift of the area could help. Basically the thread is doing the same job in holding the skin up. Though to a lesser extent.

Its as if the muscle above my brow and around my eye doesn't work anymore!

Where are you based? I had ptosis surgery in London if you are seriously looking for a surgeon. The wait list takes forever also, so you could start saving.

Short term fix, I do this as one brow arches slightly higher, is to use eyebrow pencil to even then up. Raise one eyebrow up by over lining with brow pencil on top of the brow. Lower the other eyebrow by over lining with brow pencil under the brow. Longer term fix is to exercise raising the lower brow regularly in front of your mirror.

A plastic surgeon recommended surgery, but I wasn't keen for many reasons.

It depends what you would like. Surgery could eliminate the issue, but you may look like a different person e.g. Renee Zewelleger. Botox takes the edge off the droop. I'm still a bit droopy compared to others but I look like 'me'

There are lots of facial muscle exercises on YouTube, they might help. Basically, even if you just get used to lying in bed on one side it can affect muscles and in turn the way bones are positioned.

Do you eat on one side of your mouth? The eye and mouth will be closer together on the side you eat on if that’s the case. The other side of the mouth the muscle will be weaker and point down and the eye brow will be higher.

There's a facial yoga program (face yoga method) run by a lady who claims to have corrected her own facial asymmetry. I can't vouch for that or its effectiveness but I have done other facial yoga in the past which I think was generally beneficial... Well I think I look worse now I've stopped if that makes sense?!

@BlackSwan could you PM your surgeon? Were you happy with the results?

Thanks for responses, but as I mentioned in my op, I've been told I DON'T have ptosis. But maybe I do? My eye and brow are droopy... is it possible to have ptosis affecting that area as a whole??

Can anybody who mentioned they've had surgery, can you tell me what was involved and how much it cost you?

As I said before, I've seen people about having botox, they said it wouldn't be appropriate to what I want doing.

I might be interested in the thread lift, i've never heard much about that before though.