How do I embrace my curly hair more?

[Teadrinker11]

I've spent a good chunk of my life trying to battle my very thick, curly hair but now I want to start letting it be itself more and to be able to leave it down. I've spent so long trying to get it straight, blow dry it, etc but am ready to embrace it for what it is more. I learned too late that it should only be brushed when wet, and have noticed a bit of a difference if I brush it after being washed and let it air dry. The natural curls are very much there, but they're not defined necessarily, and it's still quite frizzy, but not as much as if I brush it when dry. How do I keep all the curls in place without it looking like a bush?

Never brush when dry, always use a conditioner and never blow dry. You could try curl definition cream, I tend to run gel lightly through mine when wet and that stops the frizz once its air dry.

So this could turn into an essay

To keep it short and sweet (relatively anyway), I recommend looking up Manes by Mell on YouTube. She has a number of helpful videos, they’re not too long and easy to follow. I’ve linked one as an example on .

Personally, the big difference was first finding products that worked better for my hair - part of that was just better understanding what my hair is like and what it needs. Videos or reading will help with that. I now realise I need a lot of moisture in my hair, but can’t handle too much in the way of oils because it weighs my hair down too easily.

Also, you need a good cleanser to remove product build up (as product usage is usually heavier with curly hair, plus it’s preferable usually to wash less frequently).

My example routine: I wash my hair twice a week. I use Jason anti dandruff shampoo on my scalp (hormonal scalp issues!) and Charles Worthington every day gentle shampoo on the rest of my hair. That helps to really cleanse my hair.

Then I use As I Am co wash as a second cleanse (co wash is basically washing with conditioner, this is a product sold as a co wash though). Keeps hair super soft as well as clean. Follow with actual conditioner - I like Shea Moisture conditioners, especially the honey one. Detangle in the shower with a Tangle Teezer.

After the shower, I use Cantu curl activator cream as a leave in, and Cantu flaxseed gel. I use a 7 row Denman brush to style and clump curls, then diffuse with a hair dryer. There is no way for me to explain that well, but honestly there are so many videos that will show you this better than I can describe! I learned about Denman styling my curls from Manes by Mell but there are plenty other videos from other people too. Made a huge difference to having nice curls.

One thing to watch out for - the ‘Curly Girl is the only way’ people. I say this as someone that started Curly Girl (or CG) routine over 10 years ago. What I kept was no sulfates or silicones in my products because that really does work better for me and results in less frizz, so do check it out as it has helped loads of people. However your curls will not somehow fail if you use a comb or a towel on your hair (this will become familiar if you see any strictly CG stuff online).

In summary - get to know your hair type, try some products to compliment it, and watch some tutorials on curly styling. The styling makes a huge difference I find, the products second but still important.

I use a curling wand to add a few well placed, properly defined curls to break up the frizz. Makes me feel like I still have a modicum of control. ☺️

I am not full CG but this is what I do
All upside down!
Wash - usually bounce curl shampoo
Condition - usually innersense conditioner
Detangle with paddle brush
Squish conditioner a bit, rinse, leave a small amount in
Squeeze water out
Rake through Giovanni foam
Brush again
Glaze over and scrunch aveda gel, tip head from one side to other and keep scrunching, stand upright and glaze gel over top layer and scrunch a bit more
Diffuse it until it's crunchy then scrunch it until it's soft

It sounds ridiculously long but it's not! I sleep on a silk pillowcase too

Curly girl method. Ride out months 1-2 and it all gets SO DAMN GOOD. After 30years of frizz and crazy "wtf is it going to do tonight?" Hair- we've finally FINALLY made friends.
I'm now almost two years into CGM and there's no going back no way.