Please help a scruffy size 22 look lovely.

[chocolatespiders]

I wear uniform for NHS community job which consists of black trousers, polo and fleece.
Weekends I have one pair of jeans and a blouse I seem to wear all weekend.
Don't go out socially (does anyone??) so don't need dressy.
I love seeing people in leggings and boots but don't know if I am brave enough.
Would be worried the leggings would show bulges at top of thigh.
I really just don't know what to wear for my size and would love some help.
I don't have a bedroom so storage is an issue so only looking to buy a few bits for weekends.
Thankyou

I also completely disagree with that comment quoted by the pp. I'm 16/18. Not obese as I am tall, but I am a bit overweight, just very big framed with it. Not sure why I feel I have to declare my size, as if it is a status, but you know.

There are many women much bigger than I am who look a lot better than I do! This obsession with being a size 10 is actually fairly modern as a concept. It isn't the natural thing that people become determined to shrink their bodies, perhaps to a size which is nigh on impossible to maintain. There is a lot of history to it, which I have read a bit about and it is quite eye opening. Read up if you are interested, on where bmi came from and the history of fat phobia in relation to slavery and racism.

Obviously, there is a point where it's damaging your health to have a certain lifestyle, one symptom of which can be getting very fat. But I think treating fatness as the thing which needs to be cured, is misplaced.

@Swaddlemeinplants

I’m not trying to sound like a cow honest! I say this as an obese size 18 woman... I don’t think anyone looks lovely that size, sorry. I wear leggings sometimes and frankly, they look awful. I have absolutely enormous hip dips/love handles that just weren’t there at a smaller size and they make even vaguely form fitting skirts and trousers look terrible. Tunics/loose tops just make you even fatter! I tend to wear loose skirts and vest tops. To be brutally honest, imo, the answer is to lose weight and I’m not trying to be a bitch when I say that. I am very overweight myself and trying to lose.

Sorry but why bother replying to the thread? You had nothing useful to offer, just a put down that no matter what overweight people always look awful which just isn’t true. It doesn’t matter that you’re also overweight, your words are just as hurtful. I’m sorry you feel like a crock of shit but there’s no need to try to bring others down to your level. You have no idea why the op is overweight, in my case it’s from medication. I’m trying to lose but it’s hard and in the mean time I like to dress well to feel good about myself. I don’t think anyone is ugly on the outside but some people really are on the inside. I’m baffled by your reply, I hope it made you feel better.

Agreed. You come on the Style section for clothing advice and get told to lose weight. Actually most overweight people - myself included know we need to lose weight. Feeling terrible about yourself is actually counter productive because you tend to think “ what’s the point” and reach for the biscuits or chocolate. Whatever your size you deserve to feel good - feel like the best version of yourself. Perhaps not everybody is that way but when I make a bit of effort with my appearance I feel a bit more motivated to practice other types of self care - like exercise. I also feel like that about having a tidy home ( which I currently don’t ) - less internal chaos. You can be casually dressed as a plus size and look good. It’s about the hang and the way clothes skim over your body. I was looking at joggers from the White Company rather than ASOS. Hard to tell if the fabric is better but my feeling is the quality would be better and the cut more flattering. Combined with the right style sweater could look great. Maybe that’s not to the OPs taste... I probably wouldn’t want to hang out at home in a tea dress at the moment. Investing in a couple of nice quality pieces will be better than lots of cheap items though IMO.

I found at sizes 22 that leggings (good thick ones with high waist) or skinny mid or high rise jeans with a longer top that came to just below my hips was best.

I used to go with really baggy stuff but actually that was worse than more fitted clothes that skim over my bulges. Baggy just looks tentlike.

I got longline vests from peacocks or Sainsbury's which could go under a shorter cardigan or jumper for layering.

I also bought the boatneck bodycon midi dresses from Gap, really nice thick jersey that doesn't cling or bobble, came to knees and just skimmed over all my flabby bits. Paired with nice thick bright coloured Snag tights, knee or calf high boots and a longline cardigan in autumn/winter.

Highly recommend Snag tights, they fit! Can pull them right up to under my boobs so they kind of hold everything in place, crotch isn't at my knees and the waistband doesn't roll down. I do find them a bit less hardwearing than other brands, but the fact I can wear them all day without having to constantly yoink them up as I walk makes up for that.

Very proud of the fact that I've gone from a size 22 in August last year to a 16 now and looking forward to hitting my goal weight so I can buy a whole new wardrobe.

Holy clothing. Deliveries from stock arrive in five days. Haven't had any of their oos designs made up specially, but they will do that.

holy clothing

I'm hoping Swaddle has got the point, and has stopped projecting onto other posters now. OP, I also get quite a bit of Italian clothing. Smart casual, and skims rather than just being baggy. I would rather have less nice pieces, than more shit clothing.

I like very dark but stretchy jeans, George wonderfit (or something similar) are good. I like thicker long line vests or T-shirt’s with a cardigan or thinner jumper which are looser. Some good trainers or Chelsea boots. In summer midi dresses are ideal for me, I’m 5’9 and size 22.

I'm hoping Swaddle has got the point, and has stopped projecting onto other posters now
I never posted with the intention of upsetting anyone.

Size 20/22 here and currently have on Tesco jegging jeans, grey jumper dress from h and m and a Uniqlo thermal vest. I buy from cos as their loose fit dresses and shirts are amazing, jersey anything is a no no for me but I love a short skirt, tights and boots. Jeans from next have been great the sculpt ones as they are stretchy and have a high waist. Gap jumpers are also a good basic. H and m great for bits as well. Take time to look through and decide on what you will actually wear!

Ok, the important thing to remember is that if you want to look good, you need to feel good in what you are wearing. It has taken me years to realise that you will always look better in something that makes you happy rather than in something that is deemed ‘appropriate’ for your shape. So what do you like? What do you wish you had the courage to wear? What do you see on other people and wish you owned? Start there.

I’m a size 18/20, 5ft6. Today I’m wearing mid blue mom jeans, a black peplum hem sweatshirt and silver trainers. I love this outfit, it makes me happy.

A few tips for dressing “well”:

• wear whatever styles you love but always make sure they fit properly
• good outfits start with good underwear. Make sure you are wearing the right size bra.
• never get dressed in a hurry, decide what you are going to wear the night before to avoid those soul destroying I HAVE NOTHING TO WEAR I HATE MY BODY meltdowns.

I tend to live in tunics / longline tops and jeans. I'm happy with how I look, and couldn't care less if people think my clothes are unflattering - I wear with confidence regardless

Next do some jersey denim leggings that are comfy and quite flattering. I have chunky legs and often wear them with ankle boots and a bum covering boyfriend cardigan. Also, ponte trousers or leggings are thick and good to wear in winter. Longline shirts can look nice too if you don't want a billowy tunic. I got a longline checked shirt from Simply Be that I wear a lot.

Getting the right size and fit will make you look and feel so much better. I had a bit of denial going on about my size for a while and definite self-loathing, but when I measured myself, and started buying the right sized clothing, it got easier to dress well.

It's just so wrong to say that if you are plus sized nothing will look good - in my mums group of 12 mums the one who always looks the best by far is a size 18-20 - she has a slightly retro vintage vibe (dungarees, DMs, headscarf's, red lip etc) & always looks amazing! I look forward to seeing her new outfits each week. The rest of us are a mix of sizes 8 to 14 (me) and never look anywhere near as good as her.. have you looked on Pinterest/Instagram for ideas? I like itsEm (YouTube)/itsEmChannel (insta) she's down to earth & has nice style .. good luck op, researching & buying a few new clothes can do wonders for your mood

@chocolatespiders how are you getting on?

I have ordered a tunic online and some biker style boots from m and s.
I have also ordered a longline cardi that will cover some sins.
Feeling better about it now and have just had a clear out of 5 sizes too small clothes that I was keeping but feels good to get rid.
Thanks for asking.

If you’re pear shaped you would look great in a long-line Breton top. MandS do some wonderfully comfy skinny jeans.

I'm a size 20/22 and can get away with fairly casual for work. I've just bought some really nice black ponte leggings from White Stuff (generously sized and not a tight fit) and I wear lots of Joe Brown tunics. They're so well cut that they flatter, and I wear either knee high boots or Doc Martens with them. Seasalt tunics are also really good but I usually have to size up with their clothing. I have some simple longline cardigans from M & S in black and charcoal, and or wear a poncho type wrap.

That’s a promising start, good for you having a clear out!

Let us know how you get on when your orders arrive.

WOW what a lovely website Seasalt is

I really like Marks & Spencer Per Una jeans. They have some lovely colours just now. Also, conveniently they do long and short versions

The problem is... if you’re really overweight buying new clothes feels like an acceptance that you won’t lose it. It’s really hard to feel that you’re worth a decent wardrobe when you’re overweight. I look like a right fucking mess because of this fact alone, it’s a proper stumbling block.

I live in black tents at the moment (18) but have some delicious stuff in my wardrobe in 10-12

@TramaDollface

Well you’re not a size 10/12. Maybe you will be again, maybe you won’t. Is wearing black tents a form of punishment for “ failing” and gaining weight? Does it make you feel better about yourself or worse? I’ve gone from a 16 to 18 in lockdown and it’s not a great feeling but it doesn’t mean I’m going out of the house looking like a state. I’m going to be the best version of me at whatever weight. I’m not going to invest heavily in clothes but I’ll buy a few things...( not fast fashion) and if and when I lose weight I’ll have them tailored. I quite like Helenwearsasize18 on Instagram for demonstrating a love of life and fashion doesn’t stop because your clothes have a certain number in them.

@divebar Yeah I know I totally agree with you it’s ridiculous!!

I put on loads of weight through sudden mobility issues, at one point I was in a wheelchair for a bit. Weights just piled on, much of it due to a lack of physical confidence, I walk around so slowly like a properly old lady yet.... am compounding the problem

I’ve become horrendously lazy

@TramaDollface

Please don’t punish yourself. We all get to be overweight for a myriad of reasons. It sounds like your reasons were pretty much beyond your control. Please do something to make you feel nice about yourself.