Why do I buy nice clothes but never wear them?

[Uhohmummy]

I’m stuck in a rut - I’ve got a wardrobe full of nice clothes but throw on the same tatty joggers and baggy sweatshirt every day. I seem to have got into a mentality of saving everything “for best” and can’t be bothered to make an effort. This would be fine if I was happy with how I look but I’m really not. I think my biggest mistake is buying smart/going out clothes when actually I have 3 young kids and work part time in a casual job. My youngest is now 3 though so I feel like I can make more of an effort - but I don’t.
Not sure what I’m asking here but it’s probably:

1. How can I get back into the habit of making an effort and feeling good about how I look?
2. Can anyone recommend any pieces for putting together a nice (not scruffy) casual wardrobe?

Just put 'em on! Fuck it. Feels nice to wear things that make you happy, whatever they are.

It's difficult at the mo as there's not as much to do, but I still work at home in nice clothes if I feel like it!

Force yourself to wear the nice stuff. Lay out a whole outfit the night before and wear it. Repeat until you have worn everything at least once.

Yes I think that’s good advice. I’m going to think about outfits the night before and try to put aside some time in the morning to get ready, rather than throw on whatever I wore the day before.
I feel like this issue is affecting my confidence a lot. I sometimes can’t be bothered to wash my hair for 4-5 days. Not judging anyone who does that but it makes me feel crap so I don’t know why I do it to myself.

Any ideas for nice casual clothes that can replace tatty joggers and unflattering baggy sweatshirts? I’m going to get rid of those to remove the temptation to default to these every day.

I know how you feel @Uhohmummy, I find I order nice things and don't bother opening the parcels. Not been anywhere for so long.

I was in the supermarket yesterday and the family in front of me at the checkout looked so street-style trendy. I felt washed out, but I did think that I don't have to grab the nearest garment each time, and wearing a mask is no excuse to not bother with make up.

It's nice to see people having made an effort.

Joggers that aren't tatty and flattering sweatshirts perhaps?
Jeans and jumper?Overshirt, t-shirt and jeans?
Shirtdress/tunic and thick tights/leggings?

Join the outfit of the day thread and post a picture of yourself in your lovely clothes each day.
(I'm great at giving advice but I rarely look acceptable enough to post a letter at the mo let alone post a picture on the internet 😁)

I must try harder but well those harem pants are just so comfy.

I suppose what I’m asking is what makes flattering joggers and sweatshirts as I’m clearly going wrong here!
Tunic and tights is not my style at all but jeans are. The thing is, you can wear jeans and a t shirt and look great or wear them and look scruffy, I always seem to be the latter. How do I elevate them to stylish?

Trust me !Most relatable thing !! I think most of the girls are searching for answer to this question!

I don't wear sweatshirt or joggers so I can't answer you on that one, ther than some sweatshirts seem boxy and others drape. tbh the only people I've seen looking good in joggers have been dancers or athletes.

I look ok in tunics and tights but tend to keep them for work and it can look a bit frumpy.

I'm not stylish but

Jeans look ok, if they fit well. Rips and fraying isn't a good look on anyone. Too tight on an overweight person isn't a good look.

Without knowing your body shape and what styles you like, it is difficult to say.

What sort of shops/retailers do you like? What sort of look?

Agree with some other posters above - planning is key
I will get out outfits for next 2-3 days and hang ready for wearing
I generally know where I’m going or what I’m doing for next few days so can choose appropriately and removes the thought process each morning!
I’m also quite lazy so will pick things that have a theme so no need to change accessories or outerwear

I think you need to bin all the scruffy unflattering clothes and then you won't have a choice but to wear your nicer clothes.
If life lends itself more to joggers then buy some new ones - I think slim fitting are more elegant than baggy ones. Bin them as soon as they start looking faded or old. Pair with nice jumpers. These things don't have to be expensive. I've bought nice ones in the past from Next and the supermarket.

Try looking at different shops. Uniqlo is good for basics. Jeggings can be an alternative to joggers.

I never thought I'd even shop there but I have skinny jeans from Fat Face and I love them and I have lots of jeans. I usually recommend Gap for jeans - I think they last well, the colour is good and the cut usually suits me. I could talk jeans for quite some time. Other jeans that I find comfortable are 7 for all mankind. I tend to buy jeans in charity shops - they are usually less than £5 and I've bought some fab ones for 50p.

M&S does great athleisure and their jeans are worth a look too.

The 'yummy mummies' I know like Boden and Hobbs. I like Toast, Plumo, Isabel Marant, Agnes b, Comptoir des Cotonniers, Margaret Howells etc. You can get items with that vibe from Cos, H&M, Zara and the like. It won't be the same quality. You can get bargains on ebay and similar sites.

I dress as if I'm going to work. Even though I work from home. My kids act up if they think I'm at home, so I have to dress like I'm going into the office. So I put my make up on, do my hair and wear something smart.

I tend to wear Jersey dresses and tights though, so not everyone's style. They don't need ironed, I can throw one on and I'm dressed.

Thank you. Some good ideas and inspiration on here. I like Isabel Marant and Sezane style. I’ll have a look at Cos and Zara but I find those websites really hard to shop from so probably need to go to a shop. I think a bit part of the problem is making time for myself so I’m going to try to change that too.

Maybe look at Pinterest for outfit inspiration -
wearing leisure wear if you’re happy with it but perhaps mixing with some good quality knitwear or tops too, and gradually transition away. You could look at Uniqlo or H&M for some nice pieces this season.

Maybe also some slightly trendier trainers, some nice accessories or a better coat would make you feel more ‘done’?
Getting a low maintenance hair style maybe too?

For me there is no point in any of it if my underwear isn’t right, a decent fitting bra and knickers make the difference IMO as once you have those on you wear everything better. Plus you feel less inclined to put scruffy things on if you’ve got nice underwear on. Ditto a decent hair cut and good make up (even if it’s very minimal).

I also actively throw away the scruffy stuff so that I literally can’t wear it. I’ve slowly upgraded and become smarter, helped by my dc getting older, one dress that I thought of once as smart I now use for doing housework.

I often wear what's just been washed. That way I don't have to put it back in the wardrobe. So for me it's laziness and end up wearing the same things over and over again.

I totally get this. I’ve recently lost weight and I had a sort out of my wardrobe last week, bagging up everything that is too big for me for the charity shop. There were so many lovely items of clothing that I’d hardly ever worn as I was saving them for best. Some items I’d worn only once and then didn’t wear again as was waiting for the right occasion. Maybe I worried about getting things dirty, or not wanting to wash things too often. What a waste!

How about trying to wear your nice things from your wardrobe but dress them down. So a dressy skirt with a sweatshirt and trainers so you don’t feel overdressed. Or jeans with a nice shirt and knitted jumper over the top.

I also recently alternate a few grey track suits as nowhere to go really that warrants nice clothes but they are newish and not tatty...also leave hair for several days and tie it up and use leave in conditioner !!

Baby steps?
Get a pair of slim line joggers with a cinched in waist and wear with a cropped slouch neck sweatshirt, chunky white trainers, a jersey fitted blazer and then a huge wool coat to keep warm. All in colours that suit you.
For jeans, try skinny girlfiend fit with a scoop necked body and a thick maxi cardigan with hiker boots.
Or a fitted jersey midi dress with hikers/big coat.
Or a floaty midi dress with hikers/big coat
If you like Sezane, you might prefer blouses on top instead - it's a very cool look to pull off but does work with joggers/girlfriend jeans too.

Force yourself to wash your hair every 3 days by slathering deep conditioner in it the night before - double bonus as it forces you to wash it the following morning and it had the benefit of it overnight.
Tinted moisturiser, cream blush, mascara and lip gloss or lipstick can be put on in 3 minutes and perk you up.
Perfume - always lifts me. Find one you can't stop snuggling into all day.

I used to do this. I think, throw out your tatty joggers so you have to reach for the nicer stuff.

It's not everyone's cup of tea but I really like hush. You pay a small fortune for joggers and sweatshirts but you look put together without sacrificing comfort. Or that's what I tell myself at any rate .

JMAngle1 I am going to take your advice!
Also channel the mindset of people who do things even if nobody really sees.
(Steve Jobs insisting the inside of the iphone was pleasing to look at, Harry Potter film props that were authentic from top to bottom - even bits that were only part visible).

Yes JMAngel you are spot on!
I also agree with the poster who said she just grabs whatever has just been washed. I do the same which I think is why I’m in an endless cycle of tired joggers. It’s easy.