What makes the biggest difference to how you look??

[namechangesubject]

I'm naturally lazy . I used to make effort with my looks but have gradually over the years turned into a complete slattern. Think raggy nails, no exercise, forgotten how to be stylish and have a diastasis recti so tight clothing doesn't look right, so I live in baggy jumpers and jeans.

I want to fix this now, want to feel somewhat good about myself again.

The problem is I have hardly any money. I'm low paid and almost everything goes on bills. Also have debt and DC so any spare I do get I feel bad about spending on myself. Need to focus on what actually makes a difference.

The only things I think I can do for free is drinking more water and exercising at home with YouTube videos, though not sure I'll do the exercises correctly!!

So otherwise can I ask what do you think makes the biggest difference to how you look in order of importance and what doesn't make much difference in your opinion??

Thanks

Being slim
Amazing bra (Panache)
Drinking shitloads of water
Bare Minerals Complexion Rescue

Like most others, seems everyone is saying the same thing.

Hair, cut and coloured and freshly washed/styled
Make up - light and natural but blur away imperfections and emphasis the good bits.
Weight -keep it in the healthy zone.
Clothes - well fitting, and that you like and feel confident in,

What doesn't work for me: drinking loads of water, just makes me need to go to the loo constantly

What worked pre-meopause: ovulating

Whats works post-menopause: HRT

What has always worked: nice hair, eye makeup, nice teeth, nice jewellery, cover the bits that aren't great (thighs and knees, tum), emphasise the bits that are good (shoulders, arms, upper chest, lower legs); good jeans,

And obviously - smiling and laughing

Don’t spend £15 pm on clothes. Save up and buy better fit/fabric.

& good, well fitting bras aren’t ‘clothes’ - they’re a necessity. Like comfy shoes. I agree with pp re Panache.

Positive mental attitude

If you feel good you'll look good

You're already looking after your hair so just little things like keeping your nails nice, file them a couple of nights a week while watching tv. Use hand cream every night when you get into bed. (So you're not washing it off for 8 hours) eat lots of fruit and veg and drink water and do a little extra exercise.

Also eating eggs I find make your hair and skin look good!

You don't need tons of cash, just a little dedication.

In terms of ageing: retinol every night, not expensive. Keeping a defined waist and arms, this doesn't mean being skinny but nothing ages a woman faster than swinging bingo wings and triangular shaped arms. Same with having a definete waist, having that big square midriff is also very unhealthy.
Drinking a lot of water fills out dehydration lines on your face.
Have your eyebrows done.
In terms of appearance:
Moisturise everyday, make sure your nails aren't chipped, scrub the dead skin off your feet. Fake tan or use a gradual tan moisturiser.
Look at other women, what do you like that they wear?
You don't have to wear a super stylish outfit everyday but just make sure that what you do wear is clean, ironed, no stains or fallen hems and it actually fits!
It sounds like a mammoth task when it's all written down but show yourself the love and respect that you deserve. Women often put their wants and needs at the bottom of the pile. Why?

Yes, like everyone else:
Being slim suits me best. (Sigh)
Drinking water
Laying off the booze
Sleep
Lots of veg and vitamins
Mascara
Tinting eyebrows
The right colours in clothing

For me is:

• having my hair washed and styled every day at home
• having some make up on and shaped brows in particular
• using acid toners. what a discovery for my skin!
• a light tan, natural or fake
• white teeth (they are naturally white but I top up with Crest strips once a year)
• vitamin C made my hair loss stop
• not smoking or drinking too much
• drinking water
• exercise to tone up and bring oxygen in
• sleep, sleep, sleep, sleep

Make up and clean hair for me.If I don't have my slap on i feel sloppy and meh

Hair - good cut and clean
Posture (generally true way you carry yourself unless you have a disability in which case it might be irrelevant) - exercise
Tone - not necessarily weight or build - exercise sleep and diet
Skin - good skin. As above
In summer - well kept feet
Hands - good moisturiser and good nails - not necessarily polish but good condition
As someone who never wears makeup I don’t really think about this and as often as not think makeup detracts.

I recently started paying more attention to my hair, after always prioritising my face and clothes for many years. It’s made a big difference:
Accepting that my natural colour (mousy) is never going to be the best for me
Accepting that air dried hair doesn’t look as good as blow dried (dammit!)
On the subject of skin:
Vitamin C serum
Yellow-toned tinted moisturiser to knock out redness

Eyebrows!

A good shape takes years off.

Well as a 40 something man, I think just little things like finding an easy and free exercise routine - maybe a walk round a park, head phones on and do it every day. Eat well in the morning and small portions after. Definitely things like hair cut/ styling always makes you feel good.

I would suggest exercise, eating well and making a daily effort with your clothes - works wonders on your mental health.

Sorry if that sounds pompous but it seems to help my crazy brain stay in check 🙄

Thanks for all these suggestions.

I agree that it looks like a lot written down but I'm going to try build stuff like nails into my daily routine.

I don't really know what my style is anymore!! I like classic and feminine but not too 'dressy' I think. I like knitwear like jumpers and knitted dresses, nice shoes, jeans. Tops are tricky because anything which hides my belly tends to look tent like, but it does need hidden, it's separated muscles and bulges so I look a bit pregnant so tight clothes are out.

Going to try ascertain my colours as well.

Keeping an eye on my weight
Kettlebells to keep my arms toned
Good posture
Hair - mine is highlighted so don't let the roots grow out so it looks shit, and get it trimmed before it looks straggly
Skinny Tan body lotion (as opposed to full on fake tan) to take the edge of the pasty look
Eyebrows tinted (I do my own) as they are very light in colour
Drink lots of water
Always always steam my clothes with a handheld garment steamer so never look creased and dishevelled, but don't have the faff of ironing
Wear clothes that fit, so if I've put on half a stone don't squeeze into things that are too tight, put them away till I get the weight back off again, and don't wear anything that's too big and baggy as it just looks untidy

OP I really feel for you having not much time or money (and I’m also lazy!).

I think we are so lucky to be alive right now, when all the good things in the world can be had so cheaply if you want them… Just to take your point on raggedy nails, I can’t believe how much money people waste on manicures. Once a week I cut mine down with nail clippers. Trim any dead skin if needed, but honestly that whole trimming cuticles thing is mostly bollocks. Take off any old nail polish, and apply one or two coats of Essie sugar daddy.

My nails always look lovely if I do this faithfully – such a lovely pale pink, with the added benefit that it just doesn’t show up if there is a chip.

Good luck!

Smiling! You can spend every penny you have on make up and clothes, but if you go about with a miserable face it won't make one jot of difference to how you appear to the world.

... with the added bonus it costs about £5 a year for my nails

Being slim

Utter game changer

I just shower and go

If I'm big it's all smoke and mirrors

I'm slim-ish. I feel a bit chubby. My healthy BMI weight is between 7st - 9st and I'm 8.5st. I was always 7.5 when younger but it's crept up with the old slowing of the metabolism. I need to keep a check on it cause I don't want to be any bigger than I am now. Downloaded my fitness Pal.

I'm going to do YouTube exercise videos for toning since it's free and I have a mat. Will rope in the DC to stand on the sidelines and motivate me on haha.

Is say 25 mins 5/6 days a week enough??

Being slim is the one biggest thing I think. Clothes look better and more options of what styles can be worn.

I'm happy to skip make up, and use very little if I am wearing it, but do like to blow dry or straighten my hair. Reasonable hair and a slim build seems to gloss over everything else in my opinion.

Long game - I look after my skin, I'm slim

Short term - I've got a blunt, thick fringe which I keep looking immaculate everyday!
Nails are always neat & painted.
Light make up everyday.

I'm naturally a scruff but get away with the joggers etc because the above makes me look polished!

Try you tubing 7 minute workouts by Lucy Wyndham Reed. There are loads of them and they are really effective.

Semi-permanent eyebrow tattoos - gives shape to my face and look natural and groomed all the time.
Paula's Choice BHA - shrunk all my pores, got rid of blackheads and completely reduced monthly breakouts.
At home Brazilian blow-dry treatment I saw recommended on here - £24, does 2 lots and my hair is lovely, silky and in good condition for 3 months at a time.
Weight - I look poorer, older and frumpier because I'm overweight.