I can't believe how much I have fucking aged in six months!

[totalpondlife]

Looking a photos taken just in January compared to now and I can't believe it! My face has just collapsed. The skin has just sunk down. The plumpness and youthfulness has just gone. I am really fucking gutted. I wouldn't mind so much if I was in a relationship - but I am not. I just feel so unattractive. I can't believe the change. I wish I had removed myself from a bad relationship two and a half years ago when I was thinking about it. I'd have had a better chance of meeting someone.

It's horrible! My face looks longer and thinner and hollower.

I really feel for you! I’ve definitely had moments where I feel my face has apparently melted in a short space of time.

Are you sure the recent photo isn’t just a really bad angle? X

Have you lost weight? Been ill? Stressed?
Don’t worry, it’s all retrievable.

Ageing is funny. I don’t think it’s linear. You don’t just look a year older every year for example. I can look the same for a few years then apparently overnight I’ll age by about 3 years! I’ll think I’m just having a bad day and I’ll look normal again the next day but no. Takes a few months to accept that is my face now!

It’s awful. Botox doesn’t help with facial sagging. I may try a radio frequency treatment.

I’ll think I’m just having a bad day and I’ll look normal again the next day but no. Takes a few months to accept that is my face now!

This is it! It's not just the photos. I've been trying to persuade myself for a while now that when I see myself in mirrors it is ' bad light' but those photos forced me to face up to the fact that I just look like that now. Went to the shops on Monday for the first time since well before lockdown. I used to like catching a glimpse of myself in shop mirrors - not fucking now! I was never a head turner or anything, but I quite liked my face. There seemed to be a sub-set of guys who liked how I looked too. Not now.
I'm off to google radio frequency treatment. Think I will start face yoga tomorrow too. That seems all the rage!
God, I wish I'd married a normal guy instead of the freak I wasted almost two decades of my life on. I should have dumped him a decade ago.

Have you lost weight? Been ill? Stressed?
Don’t worry, it’s all retrievable

I have been stressed, but that won't change. My life is just very stressful. It's not retreivable. I'm just ageing. I'm 47. I always used to look a lot younger than I am. I was still occasionally getting id'ed at 30! But the gap between how I look and my actually age has been rapidly narrowing. I was gutted when someone guessed my actual age a couple of months before lockdown.

Get bloody facebook ads for 'dresses for the older woman' now.

how old are you? I find once I hit the early 40s, I aged overnight. Then stayed the same for a while before I had another overnight aging.

I had to go through skincare. I first started retinols and it got better after 4-5 months but still looked dull. I have recently added hyaloronic acid and I figured my skin was dehydrated and it made quite a difference too... sometimes it is just a question if working out what your skin needs. I changes quite a bit esp when we approach/hit peri.

radio frequency treatment

Wow its's expensive! @delatron Any idea of how long it lasts?

Does anyone know if going on HRT helps minimise skin ageing affects of menopause?

It is really expensive 😣. That’s why I haven’t had it yet. I think you have a series of them then maybe one a year for maintenance.

I’ve got a Nuface but that doesn’t make a big difference.

Apparently well placed filler can lift the face a bit but I’m scared of a puffy-faced look.

Thread lift in a few years may be an option but again expensive!!

I do think HRT helps as it can help maintain oestrogen levels and lack of oestrogen can cause ageing. I can’t have it though due to breast cancer.

Have you had the menopause? I looked a lot younger until that happened. I’m still lucky in that I look younger than I am but those hormones dipping out affected me for sure.

I feel your pain.

Every year DH asks me what I want for my birthday and every year since my 40th I reply "a facelift ha ha ha".

I'm not even joking now.

Stomach crunches-try these, get one of the abdominiser frames from Argos. I do about 400 a night and they really tighten up your chin and thin your face. I'm sure you don't look any thing as bad as you imagine though!

I wonder if a lot of it is the anger and distress at feeling you wasted time on a bad relationship? I’m in no way belittling how depressing it can be to see signs of ageing, by the way, but I wonder if you are focussing on your looks more due to reflecting on what you feel you missed out on due to being with him? When did you split up? I ask partly because an emotional upheaval shows in your face. I had quite the life crisis in my early 40s and went from looking like a fat child with curiously adult taste in clothes to a sad and slightly ravaged middle aged woman seemingly overnight. I found microcurrent facials worked great - I’d lost a lot of weight and it showed in my skin tone. I now use a Nuface and do find it helpful - I use mine either with a sheet mask impregnated with serum or a good skincare product.

@Redroses27 stomach crunches tighten your face???

Have you been drinking a lot during lockdown OP? Or eating more sugary treats than normal? I think once you hit your 40s, sugar & alcohol have an instant, detrimental effect on how you look. I totally have a ‘wine face’ the morning after even a couple of drinks. My face is sort of puffed out and dragged down. I’ve given up alcohol for long periods in the past and I’ve definitely looked fresher and younger.

Stomach crunches-try these, get one of the abdominiser frames from Argos. I do about 400 a night and they really tighten up your chin and thin your face

I've just checked the abdominiser frame in Argos. How is one supposed to use it? They don't show it in the picture.

But does it tighten the stomach as well? Really need to get rid off from some lockdown fat.

OP, I also have moments like you although I am a bit younger. I find that a good haircut can take years off. I am also trying to look into neck exercises and just to take a better care of myself although I should have done it years ago and hadn't taken my youth for granted.

Stomach crunches-try these, get one of the abdominiser frames from Argos. I do about 400 a night and they really tighten up your chin and thin your face

Really? That's fascinating!

No, not had menopause, but GP said I have some 'pinking' which is a sign of the start.

Sugar and alcohol - have always liked sweet things, and have been eating and drinking more - will cut back on this.

I wonder if a lot of it is the anger and distress at feeling you wasted time on a bad relationship? Probably. My whole life is fucked over tbh. I'm waiting to get proper MH support through services.

It is all retrievable. I'm 48 and look younger now than I did at 39.

What works for me - brace yourself

Be at least 1/2 stone more than your normal for you weight
No sugar - seriously none
Protein and fats with every meal but low carb (veg and fruit are the only carbs I eat now really)
Collagen protein powder every morning in my spinach smoothie - it really firms my skin
The Ordinary Ascorbic acid powder mixed into SPF 50. I had never used vit c before thinking it was just for pigmentation, but it's really firming.
A retinol product at night
Nu Face 2 minutes every morning
Abigail James on YouTube Face Massage at least 3 x week
Dermawand for 5 minutes every morning - this is a radiofrequency device for home use. I've paid for courses of RF at salons in the past and they are effective but time consuming and costly. I prefer to do it daily as finds it keeps everything up.
LED mask Red light. 10 minutes every night - I can tell if I miss a go as in the morning, skin isn't as springy.

No sugar I've repeated it as it's the most important thing - google glycated collagen to persuade you.

Minimal alcohol/no alcohol. I struggle with no alcohol but definitely look waaaay worse even after 1 drink the next day - haggard and face droopy nit to mention that it also makes me crave carbs which are a no no!

20-30 minutes weight training daily. I follow Rachel Holmes on YouTube and face looks all glowy and lifted afterwards - more defined jaw.

Water. at least 1.5l dayl

Make up wise, avoid foundations and concealers if you can - they are very ageing on me. I love Mac strobe cream and a highlighter all over my cheek area to plump it out and make it look more round.

And obviously sleep - I need 8-9 hours these days.

You will be fine.

Just saw your post about stress - google Ashwagandha supplement - excellent at reducing anxiety and being able to roll with stressful situations.

Yes @JMAngel1 speaks the truth!

Have also got an LED mask and I was just seeing a difference when it broke. Bloody £300 so trying to get a replacement.

Thinking of buying a Newa device which I guess is similar to the dermawand.

I use Retin-A as it’s supposed to promote collagen. Started on retinol and moved up.

Take a collagen supplement every day. No idea if this works!

I’ve had lasers in the past which were good for fine lines. And again stimulating collagen.

It all gets a bit expensive!

One think I can’t manage is giving up wine. I’ve cut down and I know it would make such a difference but can’t quite give it up.

@Delatron. my mask was £110 from Amazon Project E and really good.

Money wise, it's just about prioritising your major concerns. So I buy very cheap clothes (Zara is a splurge), cut and colour my own hair, do my own nails, dye brows etc so that I can use my "me money" on skincare, supplements and gadgets. Plus it's kind of my hobby ( but not my only hobby)

Red wine is my achilles heel too