DH has no sense of style

[youareminebestfavourite]

Hi,
Happily married for 20 years and the moderate sense of style my husband had when we met has slowly evaporated over the years and is now sadly nil.
He's taken to wearing trousers with holes in them, ill fitting hoodies and just generally looks like he has put on a random selection of items.
His 75 year old father gave him a pair of horrible old man trousers recently and he's taken to them with great enthusiasm.
I take a lot of pride in my appearance and like to look well turned out wherever I go.
I have previously not said anything because I didn't want to try and change him but I can't stand it any longer- he's looking so scruffy even the kids are commenting.
Can't even blame lockdown, because we're in NZ and we're back to normal life down here.
Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can gently encourage him towards better choices without sounding like I'm nagging him?

Does he wear this stuff to work? Surely not.

Have you not bought him nice clothes ?

My DH works from home and when he first started he started to look a mess. Most of his clothes were work or smarter for going out. So he was just wearing the same casual clothes all the time and they were past it last. So I bought him new clothes. He could buy them him self but he can't be bothered and doesn't spend money on himself, but I like all of us to look and dress nicely.

Father's Day and birthdays , Christmas I always buy him clothes. ( as well as a normal present)

@1neverending I think that's it - when he's going somewhere special he makes an effort, it's just the casual gap between work and going to an occasion- which is most of normal life!!
I haven't bought him clothes in the past because I don't want to feel like his mother, but maybe I just need to get over that and hit the shops for him. It's getting to the point where I don't want to go out with him

Waves fro Canterbury. Your husband sounds like he has embraced being the archetypal “kiwi bloke”
I wound tend to ignore that bad decisions but when he wears something you like than praise enthusiastically.
I would also but him a few pieces - a nice jumper or t shirt - not too many things because he may feel pressured and rebel.
I would also throw out the worse of the holey clothes- again not all at once.

I convinced my husband to do Marie Kondo with me and throw out all his old/faded/ill-fitting/damaged stuff. He was actually very enthusiastic about it, I didn't push him at all on any item, didn't even comment except to keep asking him if stuff brings him joy. So maybe your DH just needs a little nudge in the right direction.

You need to buy him clothes.

He clearly doesn’t want to think about it and doesn’t care - you do. So buy him the sort of thing that you think is appropriate and in his taste. Remove the other stuff (‘it’s in the wash’ for a while) and problem fixed.

I have to do the same. I wish DH cared more about clothes but he doesn’t.

I really resent the idea that women have to buy their partners clothes so they will look nice! Oh sure I’ll just add dressing you to my mental/work load.

Mines exactly the same. Ffs just make a bit of effort to look after yourself it’s not that bloody hard!

But I’m on my period so maybe I’m just having a hate everything day! 😬

My OH and I do not look like a couple if you judged us by our styles of dress, so this is something I'm used to sort of. When we're out together I just see it as if I was out with a friend. I'd no sooner advise them than I would happily receive advice. So, it's from within this context that I'm wondering if you feel his style of dress somehow reflects on to you and this is why you feel motivated to change it?