Someone help me! Desperate!

[Toomuchtooyoung01]

Seriously, I need help. I am not exaggerating when I say I have no idea what to wear any more. I literally live in leggings, battered converse and rotate a selection of 3 really old, unflattering tops.
I'm only 5ft tall but weigh roughly 14 stone (please don't judge me). Most of my weight is round my tummy, although I wouldn't say any part of me is in good nick. I hate my calves as they are this reslky horrible, manly shape (I have actually had people yell out of car windows at me about the shape of my calves). It puts me off wearing skirts as I'm so conscious of them.
I have basically completely given up on myself since having the kids and I dont want to be this scruffy frump any more. I'm only early 30s but I'm sure I could pass for 40.
Please someone in the know, help me!!!!
Thanks x

Can you be more specific about how you would like to look? What sort of style are you going for? Do you have a rough budget?

Well you are clearly very down about yourself so I think its great you want to invest some time and money in yourself.

We've all got flaws. Well most of us. When I went through low self esteem after having baby I had a colour consultation to see.what suited me. It honestly made a massive.difference. So now I just look for clothes in the colours I know suit me. Makes it all much easier.

Colour me beautiful did mine but there are others out there.

Have you time and money to spend on yourself?
Do you like your hair? Do you wear make up? Nails?
Have you tried jeggings instead of leggings (more flattering). Would maxi dresses suit?

And ignore idiots shouting out of cars.

I think I went a bit frumpy when the kids were small. You'll get there! I now dress a bit like a teenager at times but I don't care!

Might be an idea to follow 'normal' people on Instagram who do fashion accounts to get some inspiration. Not the polished ones. I'm 40+ so follow stealmystyle40, lovestyle40, doesmybumlook40 and others - I'm sure there are ones in their 30s too!

M&S also have staff with a range of body shapes, styles and ages that each have an Instagram account (not that I'm saying M&S is ultra stylish but it might give you basic ideas and a stepping stone to find other accounts).

You might find straight leg or bootcut jeggings or jeansmore flattering on the calves than leggings. Simply Be did some called Bella last yesr, don't know if they still stock them. Or you could try M& S or Next, both of which do short length jeans.

• Dickheads generally yell at every person on the street, no matter how good they look, what gender they are etc (I’m a size 6/8 and I get yelled at when out running. Most of my Male friends who are cyclists and runners get the same).

• Can you narrow down your goals a bit? What’s your budget? What is your lifestyle? Realistically if you’re a SAHM you don’t need people telling you to buy a blazer and heels, but you can do a good “Daily easy casual look”

• I’d actually start with feeling a bit better about yourself emotionally . Can you find a fitness lesson on YouTube you like following and try keeping up with it? My top tip is to shop around and try different things (it’s free obviously) until you find one instructor you like. You can try yoga/Pilates/ any of the dancey videos.

Start with something small (like a daily 20 minute lesson) and just use it to reconnect with your body and get confident.

• Small steps - you’re not going to change overnight but you’re going on a journey.

I bet your calves are nowhere near as bad as you imagine! Have you tried fake tan? It works wonders for slimming legs down, and always makes me feel more polished and good about myself... Isle of Paradise drops are great as you can build them up gradually, or the Dove tanning moisturiser.

Midi skirts might also work well, as they'll cut off where you calves are slimmest. Asos has a good petite range, and ones in bright, cheery colours are easy to style with a plain white vest or t-shirt and converse or sandals.

And as a rule, no man who shouts out of a car has ever had anything to say worth listening to!