Beauty gift fatigue

[friendlyflicka]

I am the most committed beauty product lover. Always have been. Love Selfridges make up hall more than anywhere except Libertys. Always want expensive products however stingy I am in other areas of life.

About 5 years' ago my sister bought me Libertys Advent Calendar when they were just in the beginning stages. It was so lovely. I was having a particularly horrible time, and opening luxury item every morning kept me going.

But fast forward several years, and now, when September comes and there are gifts with purchase and then all the advent calendars. I have done gift with purchase - Libertys - loved it. And was going to get calendar. But feeling rather full of disgust. Like I have eaten too much. Too self indulgent. I can now imagine the calendar coming and not feeling huge amounts of joy. Just a kind of addiction to purchasing them because they are there.

So I have cancelled the calendar. Just wondered if anyone else felt the same. That there is too much out there and it makes me feel a bit ill at myself...

Get a box and put one item a day in it then donate it to a women's refuge or similar. More more rewarding and appreciated by the ladies who need them.

I often pick up an extra shampoo / conditioner / toothpaste while shopping to donate. I am never sure if the mini-sizes in advent calendars are at all useful to women’s refuge (some are so specific in their function eg hair mask / hair fragrance / glow lotion etc) and it somehow made me feel cruel to be donating a tiny and potentially useless item to someone without the means of repurchasing the item if they enjoyed it. The only mini-items I donate are wrapped hotel soaps which last much longer than their liquid counterparts.

So I usually divide up my gift-with-purchase items and share it among friends and colleagues. At least I know that my friend with big bouncy curls might discover a new favourite hair product, or the other friend who always has full make-up at work could try a different mini mascara.

That way I’ve not become bored of the gifts or calendars, and it’s added some fun to the workplace during a stressful time of year.

That is lovely

not buying anymore its just too much of the same old stuff

Me too. This is the first year that I've thought, actually no. I don't want or need this.

Last year I ended up buying 2 M&S calendars (kept both for myself as no one else wanted it!) plus another one and ended up with boxes just overflowing with mini-items. So much packaging, so much STUFF. Still using things now and have no desire this year to pile more stuff into my life.

I did go to Superdrug and buy a basket full of stuff for the local refuge to try to counterbalance things a bit but I absolutely hear you. This year I'm done with buying things that are just not needed.

I had to up my charity donations last year as I felt so bad about getting the space nk gwp and advent calendar - I loved them but the packaging is OTT, there’s always waste and I feel it’s indulging the worst instincts at a time of year that should be about others - constant novelty, constant treats.

Signing up to mailing lists is the same though, in return for discounts you have constant pressure to buy

I’m dithering this year!

I hear you. It feels a little gluttonous when people say they are buying multiple advent calendars for themselves. Fair enough one treat but 7, 8, 9 and the cost of most of them how are you going to use that much stuff?

Bundle up the unused stuff and put them in a clean unwanted make up bag and give to the charity shop.

Look at the beauty hoarder thread.
I've banned myself from buying but have the occasional lapse and it feels good to see the piles of stuff get used.
Sometimes using the stuff feels like a chore.

You have hit the nail on the head about constant novelty.

I was listening to something about the addictive danger of loot boxes for kids in online games. That actually resonated with me about all these presents for the self, that are random choices from companies. it encourages a side of myself I don't think is very healthy.

There are so many bad psychological impacts from the digital world we poorly understand - Facebook, google etc, they’ve got teams of behavioural psychologists figuring out how to get us to click and indulge, they can profile what discount will make person type 1 buy, what discount will make person type 2 buy and they decide which adverts and discounts to show you based on your browsing history.

People are going to have to be tougher than ever before at standing up to the insidious advertising. Not sure about a purchase? Watch 10 YouTube clips about how great it is.

Beauty advert calendars are probably a godsend for beauty companies as you end up buying products you wouldn’t otherwise have bought the rest of the year. The house always wins.

I think it is the FOMO aspect.

Everyone posting about the different calendars and what they got each day. Often boredom etc.

Ooh great for travel and gifts for my lovely dds

To say nothing of the kids shows with 12 seasons, a crazy number of episodes that play one after the other - it is so much harder to self regulate these days. When I was young if you left the tv on too long on a Sunday you’d end up facing a choice of Grand Prix, horse racing or some old film and could easily choose to forgo those pleasures!

I got a Holland and Barrett one in the sale last year and i liked it. Brilliant.

@Christmasmulling, I totally agree - it is frightening how i can be manipulated even while I am aware of it

You've got to wonder the effect on people with poor impulse control, personal debt has gone up and up. I'm not sure how facebook, google etc got away with users not owning their IP address/data sent in internet communications so that it could be effectively used against them, which is what's happening. Used against with the purpose of offering you discounts which aren't real discounts as prices are then artificially inflated upfront..there was a great LRB article on this recently.

I hope I'll resist this year...

Here's an alternative which should make you feel better OP!

www.goodgifts.org/advent-calendars

I'm getting it this year instead of the M&S one and I'm hoping the DC will appreciate it too

That’s a good idea, thanks I hadn’t seen this!

I had a look at all the beauty calenders, GWPs and gift sets this year and haven't found anything that I can justify. I have had enough too.

I have bought two M&S ones in the past (one was towards a cousin's 25th birthday - I added in extra bits to lux it up), I think they're normally the best option.

Definitely too much consumerism and they're such a waste of packaging too. Although, they could be good for those who don't have many beauty bits.

Might treat myself (I always request no Christmas presents, unless a donation or something edible) to nice lipstick and perfume instead and put the extra cash towards a local charity or organisation.

I don’t feel bad about my advent calendar purchases. I work hard for my money, and I donate both time and money to charities/causes I feel worthy of my doing so. Unless you live very frugally, you don’t drive or holiday, you’re a vegan, and you don’t have kids, it’s literally just choosing “one thing” you’ve decided is “bad” and ignoring the others.

Do you do advent calendars for anyone else? It doesn’t solve the consumerist angle (actually it sort of does because I buy one or 2 calendars and stretch and share them between 5 people, adding socks, pants and tights, books etc.)
I’m trying to reduce the ‘making up numbers’ crap this year.

it's never been something that appeals. i don't like buying things i don't need. i know i would just end up with a load of unused miniatures going off.

i hate christmas for these exact reasons though. i'd prefer it if the emphasis was on chilling and being cozy with your family than with all this gifting. in our family we do a secret santa with a £25 limit to avoid all that and it's great. except the kids ofc got to teach them greed before they figure it out for themselves

I think between climate crisis, packaging and the likely post brexit credit crunch, we're all getting to "peak tat". Advent calendars with anything bigger than a sweetie are simply to increase consumers spending at Christmas.

WritersBlick2, who decided it has to be all or nothing?

Personally I feel that these kind of beauty calendars are not great or necessary, so don’t buy them anymore

I am not a vegan, so according to your logic I may as well spend £££ in plastic tat?

It’s about lots of people making lots of small decisions, not every individual person going all in or all out.

I agree with you @ChickenyChick small changes make a huge difference (eg. I take a glass from home with me to work to save plastic cups or bottles). If people enjoy these calendars, then great.

I walk pretty nuch everywhere, have never owned a car, have been a vegetarian my whole adult life, holiday mainly in the UK (and via train) and don't have any children (yet). I do, however, buy at least one beauty and style item a month... even though I probably have a capsule wardrobe and a small stash that could last me a few months.

There's a lot of press and talk about these beauty offerings and it does make us want to purchase items. I will try and only buy to replace and only purchase things I really love and need.