Losing my looks already? Advice!

[Justanamechange2]

I’m 23. Over the past however many months, I’ve just felt so “meh” about my appearance.

I have always loved dolling myself up and doing my hair. I still want to - but the end result is always so disappointing now, that I genuinely think I look better with my hair scraped back into a ponytail.

I have very fine hair, but a decent amount of it. Straightening it used to be my go-to. Lately though, it looks dreadful. Dull, lacklustre. Sticks to my head. I wondered if it was partly to do with the colour - I went very blonde last year, and it reallly washed me out. I’ve since had it toned down a lot, with warmer tones. It’s still quite blonde though, and I’d love to go darker again.

My skin seems soo dull these days. It feels dehydrated, yet oily at the same time. My makeup disappears and I look messy and horrible by lunchtime. I use Simple “hydrating” facial wash morning and night. Followed by Boots Botanics “Youth Maintain” moisturiser. I think I need a good face mask. Recommendations?

Could do with a new wardrobe, too. I’m very slim, hourglass figure (about the only thing I feel I have going for me, right now). 5’4. I really like 60s style shift dresses and ditsy prints. I just don’t know how to pair stuff, especially in this awkward weather.

So... this has turned into more of a rant, but I’m looking for some tips, or any one who can relate?! I feel like I’m losing my looks, I just look rough most of the time...

I would look at your diet first. Everything you put in you is reflected in your looks. Are you drinking enough water? Are you eating too much sugar and other crap? How are your vitamin levels, and are you getting enough vitamin D?

My diet is ok, but could definitely be improved! I eat veg with nearly every meal. probably don’t drink enough water.

Could probably do with some more vitamins...

I think you should start using a retinol based serum at night. It can do wonders for your skin.

Thank you, I have been curious about retinols. What are the benefits?

They promote skin renewal which really helps with brightening and evening out your complexion. I've been using them religiously since I was in my teens, and I'm 46 now and my skin is amazing. No bragging intended, I assure you! All I know is that if you take the time to care properly for your skin and body, the results are clear.

Wow, since your teens! I hope I’m not too late on the bandwagon.

I’ve been really hung up on a slight knot that’s been developing between my eyebrows (frown line). DP/friends insist they can’t see it, but its definitely there, and making me look haggard. I’ve been using Frownies adhesive strips to “correct it”, but not noticed much difference yet tbh. Could a retinol help with that, too?

It should definitely help. I also very very highly recommended using Vaseline at night around your eyes, mouth and any other problem areas. I've been using it forever and would never be without it. Here's a link to a recent thread that I posted on.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/style_and_beauty/3602246-Vaseline-on-face-before-bed

BTW, I would never use those adhesive strips. All they do is put useless stress upon your skin.

Low GI diet with healthy fats such as oily fish, avocados and nuts. Take evening primrose oil as a supplement.

You don't need retinol at your age, try a daily sunscreen (with zinc and titanium dioxide would be good to avoid irritation).
Use a cleansing oil with a flannel - I like superfacialist vitamin C for glow. Also, use a facial oil last thing at night. Botanics has a good one for a reasonable price.

A vitamin C product would be good for glow (eg. The Body Shop, The Ordinary or Nivea).

Pre-moisturiser - www.superdrug.com/B-/B-Essence-Lotion/p/605300

Daytime moisturiser - www.superdrug.com/Simple/Simple-Mini-Pouch-Protecting-Light-Moisturiser-50ml/p/769872

Night time moisturiser (will remove dead skin cells): www.superdrug.com/Garnier-Pure-Active/Pure-Active-Sensitive-Anti-Blemish-Face-Moisturiser-50ml/p/724081?gclid=CPrM77mo3-ICFdfhUQod73sDlg&gclsrc=aw.ds

Use the Internet to research what your 'season' is (to find out what clothes colours suit you best). The right colours will help you to look great, the wrong colours will look garish or make you look tired or washed out.

Mask - Superfacialist (clay mask for oil and spots, decongests), Origins drink up intensive (moisturise and glow)

Reading between the lines you actually sound a bit glum and deflated and want solutions to hide that (hair colour, products etc).
My skin always looks best when I eat healthily, drink water and exercise lots in the fresh air. Same with hair and nails. This also boosts your mood and stops you frowning! (I’m 50 and have been through all sorts of phases of looking and feeling either more or less goid...)

@Thedarklady Thank you for the list of recommendations.

Any makeup tips? I use Clarins Skin Illusion when not at work, and Rimmel Match Perfection weekdays. I think the formulation has changed, as it used to make me look glowy, but now dull and oily!

@SunnySomer

I think you’re right! I think I knit my eyebrows in stress/tension, which in part I can’t help as I work in a fast-paced, stressful environment.

I feel awfully glum. I think the weather isn’t helping...

Op, Google when to start using retinols, and it is overwhelmingly suggested to start using them in your 20s. You are is NO way "too young" for them.

The PP who said look after your health is correct. The things that will make the biggest difference:
Don't smoke
Drink less alcohol (

@Aquamarine1029

Thank you!
I’d far sooner start earlier rather than later, anyway!

Can you make yourself some time to look after yourself then do you think? Maybe take an hour out every other day to do some yoga?

@CountFosco

Thank you for your advice
I don’t smoke (never have)
Drink alcohol rarely (maybe 4 units a month? Often less )
Never used a sunbed - ghastly things!

I think my main goal is to drink more water and exercise. I’m another one of those people who keeps saying “I would if I had the time...”

Unless I wear my hair up, I have to use some form of heat on it . It’s so frizzy and horrible if I don’t.

I have fine hair but lots of it as well. I would bite the bullet and cut it into a sharp bob and regain its condition. You have plenty of dyeing years ahead of you!

I am 32 (33 next week ) and my skin is probably my best feature - I look younger than I am and my skin is naturally glowy. Part of it is luck, but the following also help (I think):
Lots and lots of water.
Lots of good fats in your diet.
Taking a good multivitamin and some evening primrose oil.
Proper, old fashioned cleansing with a good oil or cream cleanser and a flannel.
Sunscreen every day, without fail. In summer I use a proper facial sunblock (Nivea does a good matte one) and the rest of the year I use Nivea light day moisturiser which isn’t too heavy and has sun protection.
A good night cream - M&S do a great one called ‘8 hours sleep’ which makes me wake up looking like I’ve had a facial.
An acid toner - pixie glow tonic is a good place to start.

Hairwise, I’d be tempted to explore going with your natural texture, especially as super straightened hair is a bit passé nowadays - that was what all we did when I was a teenager when GHDs ruled the earth have you had a look at the curly girl method? Google it - my friend has a head of shiny auburn waves and swears by it.

Oh and lots sleep! (I have a toddler do easier said than done)

I’d suggest some blood tests, you might have a thyroid issue or a vitamin deficiency going on as you sound like you live healthily. How do you feel?

Blimey OP, I thought you were going to be at least 40!
Honestly, you're at your absolute peak of youthful beauty.
Wear sunscreen, stay hydrated, take off your make-up and moisturise, treat your hair like silk if you want it to look like silk (the best beauty tip I ever got) and enjoy being radiant with youth!

@KnitFastDieWarm

Thank you for your advice

What are some examples of foods that have “good” fats? Nuts, fish, etc? I must have a look into the evening primrose.

I used a cream cleanser with a muslin cloth a few months ago - just the Superdrug one (dupe for liz Earle I believe). My skin was slightly better, then. I have used embryolisse lait creme concentrate (I think that’s what it’s called!), and it made my skin feel amazing for the first fortnight, then didn’t make much difference after that.
I’ll look into the M&S one, it sounds lovely. What do acid toners do?

I’d like to work more with the natural texture, too. It’s not naturally curly, it’s very, very fine, and naturally has a slight wave/frizz to it. I like the natural waves look, but can’t achieve it without a curling wand.

@minipie
You have a point, there. I lost nearly a stone in a year after working in the care industry... long days, with inadequate breaks. I was a normal 8st 6lbs and dropped to 7st 7lbs. I’ve maintained this weight for a year, now, without trying. Though I much prefer my figure at this weight, I think it was after the weight loss that I started to notice my dull appearance.

7 st 7 is very little, I am 5’3 so a little shorter than you and tbh I look ill if I drop below 8 stone.

I would agree with adding good fats to your diet - nuts (incl nut butters and nut oils), avocado, olives, eggs, fish, and IMO good quality fresh meat and dairy. Basically non processed fats.

However I do think a blood test is a good idea to rule out anything imbalanced (eg hyperthyroid)

So you're underweight (BMI of 17.9). I'd prioritise getting back to your previous (healthy) weight. You definitely need to eat more healthy fats. So nuts, avocados, cheese, greek yogurt, full fat milk, eggs. You are presumably struggling to eat enough so eat lots of small meals. I bet once you are a healthier weight you're skin will start to glow again.