Ready to change from (always) jeans and t-shirts to something nicer - help please - suggestions?

[iknowimcoming]

I'm 48 size 14, apple shape, big boobs (36ff) and stuck in a rut of jeans and t-shirts which don't flatter me at all (trying to lose weight 2 stone ish). Money no problem really, I see people dressed nicely and think why don't I look nice. I don't know where to start, have lots of clothes I dont wear as never seen to have shoes to go with. I'm stuck in a (I'll buy that when I'm thinner) loop. I don't do a messy job currently sahm, so don't need practical clothes really. Can anyone suggest a couple of smarter casual outfits as a starting point please?

I'm 52 and size 14. I recently had a mastopexy (breast lift) which I feel has improved my shape hugely.
Actually I've done a complete makeover in the last few years. New hair, laser eye surgery. I'm still jeans and birkenstocks so I came on here to have a read.
I've decided to reduce my fleeces and return to knitwear.

I'm in a similar position, I'm stuck wanting to be comfortable and am also lazy about shopping so I just seem to wear the same old boring things. I go to work full time but can be casual at work so make not very much effort.

I follow this woman on instagram - thatsnotmyage.com/ - I find her outfits quite inspiring but still don't seem to have the time / inclination / spare money to go shopping.

I'm hoping that once we get our house finished (long gradual renovation) that I can spend some time renovating myself!

How about wide cropped trousers or culottes instead of jeans, which you could still wear with tees? That would look good with sandals, or trainers, depending on the weather. Maybe upgrade the t-shirts to smarter ones?

Buy several pairs of new shoes first. Get this done as it will update your look and your unworn clothes will probably work better and look more current. And don't play too safe, so ignore black and brown. Silver or gold is great for summer sandals; otherwise, tan, red and blue shoes are surprisingly versatile. Flatforms are modern, comfortable, and will add a bit of height (but the soles need to be flexible so you can walk).

It will dodge the "I will buy clothes when I've lost weight" excuse because your feet won't change size very much.

I’m a similar shape Op and this is what works for me. I’d say my style is Scandi or Japanese influenced.

I never ever wear basic t shirts.
Crew necks made my boobs look huge.
Shorts sleeves take the eye to my widest point ( boobs).
They finish at my second widest point - where my waist used to be.
They cut my body In half when I want to empathise vertical lines, not horizontal.

They are everything I dont want encapsulated in one garment.

My best points are my slim ankles, legs, wrists and neck so I try to show these off whenever possible.

Sleeves are 3/4, cap or fitted at wrists.

No high necks, I usually wear scooped or boat at they reflect my face shape but I’d wear V necks more if I had an angular jaw.

Everything has to be neat and fitted on the shoulder.

I wear lots of slim cropped trousers to show off my good legs. Cigarette trousers / jeans. Never skinny because of apple on a stick thing.

I’m experimenting with wider cropped trousers but easy to to go wrong with these if you are a certain age and end up looking like your granny in beige elasticated waist polyester trousers with a jaunty top from per una.

Tops are longer, usually crotch length and oversized to skim over where normal people would have a waist.

Winter Dresses are on or just above the knee , work with opaques and flat boots . If I was younger I’d wear shorter skirts but it’s hard to carry off the big boobs/ mini skirt look after 40 if you have a conservative job and normal lifestyle ( yeah I know that jo woods etc rock it but it’s not for me ).

Dresses are Always trapeze , cocoon or A shaped. NEVER ever shift dresses ( disaster on my curvy bod ).

I NEVER wear anything fitted at my middle, because of lack of waist . If I have a big contrast in colour between my top and bottom eg white top and navy trousers , the line is nearer crotch than waist otherwise the proportions look wrong . This was true even when I was a size 8.

I wear long jackets and cardigans ( fingertip length ) with slim trousers.

In the summer I wear mid calf to ankle length A shaped dresses and cool trainers or sandals. With either long or occasionally cropped jacket / cardigan.

Again, if I was younger I would wear short dresses but I’m too old to wear mini dresses and bare legs except on the beach. Anyway I look like an apple with two skinny white sticks at the bottom.

I am very strict about only buying things in my colours and style as I know it will end up unworn otherwise.

If you have lots of clothes you probably have smarter outfits sitting unused in your wardrobe.

I agree with XingMing - better to concentrate on peripherals rather than waste much time or money on weight-transitional clothes.

That said - swapping dull t-shirts for good quality V-necked silk vests in flattering colours would be an immediate summery improvement. Paired with a lightweight jacket and your jeans and new footwear - fine.

And it’s always worthwhile to update your hairstyle and jewellery and maybe find a new bag for summer.

Wow thanks all, really helpful. Sorry but can you explain trapeze and cocoon shaped dresses please I love dresses but don't look at them because struggle to get them to fit nicely as to fit boobs will always be too loose on hips etc but will have a look. Oddly saw some friends this morning and one of them had a beautiful dress on (she normally wears jeans) which has spurred me on a bit. Heading into town tomorrow and will try and find some shoes. Also where would I get silk vest please? Thanks so much

Depends on your budget. I’ve seen several cheaper than this which isn’t exactly a vest, I admit. But cheaper versions are quite short and the fabrics look less substantial.

Hi @iknowimcoming , I swapped from always jeans and t-shirt a couple of years ago so here is what I did

Switch to trainers for spring (Sam Smith or converse)
Nice flat sandals and a fab pedicure for warm weather

Then move to culottes or wide leg trousers and a top that ends just below your belly so you can show off your slim legs and bottom half. I would go for something like a silky or sweatshirt type material for this.

Or easier still, trapeze shape dresses - these are dresses that are wider at the bottom and narrow on shoulders - think wider than A line. I have a few of these which I wear with a t-shirt underneath in summer time.

I have just bought a really nice summer skirt in H and M - cotton, full skirt with huge pockets - so comfy and so flattering. It is midi length and I wear with bare legs (fake tan). Any top or t-shirt looks good with it.

Also, straight leg cut off white jeans with a cool scandi-type top in taupe or grey (cotton or linen blend) will look dressy but can still be casual and you can run around in it.

Look for ideas on Pinterest by finding someone whose style you like, googling them, then putting them into Pinterest. You will then see loads of looks like that person has.

Just take small steps - it has taken me years to wear a skirt for the school run!!! But as you see what suits you and what you feel good in you can try more styles.

Enjoy.

Trapeze shape dress is where it gets wider from the shoulder . Cocoon shape is they same but comes back in again slightly nearer the hem.

These ones are trapeze

Cocoon shape dress

Hmmmn - been shopping this morning - can I get your opinions on these dresses please? I don't think the trapeze style does anything for me at all but happy to be corrected oh wise ones

Nigel, will you adopt me?
You've just, in one sentence, made me realise why I look like a lardy sack of spuds in a short sleeved t shirt! Now I understand!

PS could you tell me where the first two dresses are from please?

I'm the same age and shape as you and live in jeans and T-shirts (never, ever wear skirts or dresses). If I've veered too far from my usual 'uniform' I just feel massively uncomfortable. What I have done in an effort to look smarter is to buy the best fitting jeans I can afford. Instead of cheap T's I've been buying nicer tops, from Mint Velvet, Hush, Jigsaw or Phase Eight.

Nigel, where do you get your long tops from? It’s the bane of my life trying to find tops of the right length that don’t cling.

Bumping for opinions on the dresses please

the dark dress is not the best shape or colour for you, I think. the top of the second dress is way better on you, shape wise, and colour wise. You have nice shoulders and arms, but I reckon you need a better bra, something that makes you perkier, as you look a bit squashed. You might need to go up a size in dress after you've changed bra, though. A nice tonal gladiator sandal, and a cardigan in case in gets cold and bingo.

Not keen on the dark dress at all, it’s a bit dowdy. The other one isn’t to my taste but is much more flattering.

Roman Originals have v reasonably priced cocoon dresses in plain fabrics like the ones linked to up thread.

2nd dress is lovely. Not sure about dark dress, but that maybe just because the front has lifted where you've got your arms lifted to your face. 2nd one is a keeper.

Dark dress doesn’t do anything for you. Lighter one is a more flattering shape (nice neckline in particular) though the pattern seems a bit dowdy to me (40).

Go to an independent clothes shop that has lots of different designers get the staff to bring you loads of stuff to try on. If you find a designer/make you like take pics of the item and more importantly the label then get onto eBay and search by the name of the label and your size. You'll be able to put together a new look for a fraction of the new cost and if you don't like it, relist it back onto eBay.
I changed my whole look this way, including shoes and boots.

Thanks all - dark dress will go back! Had a delivery from next today (hadn't realised they did so many 'other' brands now) and have some really nice navy culottes and some black wide leg trousers, and some bold (for me) floral wife leg trousers plus an assortment of shoes which are all really nice. You have all given me a huge confidence boost so thanks ever so much! I'm going to dds first year uni recital on Monday so am excited to be wearing something new and different to jeans. She'll be shocked to see me in something different! I'm really grateful so thanks again!