Outfit for a fancy wedding....please help!

[PersisFord]

I am so far out of my depth here, please help me! I’m going to a very fancy wedding in June, my best friend from uni is marrying the love of his life, it’s like a fairy tale. And they are both ULTRA trendy, he works in fashion, their friends are all beautiful, the wedding is styled to the max.

But what can I wear? I really want to look nice but my usual style is jeans and a jumper. There’s no point me pretending to be a fashionista but I would really like to look nice.

I’m 39, 5’7, size 10-12, red hair, brown eyes, yellowish skin. I like my legs, don’t mind my arms but HATE my tummy, which is a mess of stretch marks, caesarean pouch and a good pinch of fat. I hate it so much it makes me hate all of me and when I go to try on clothes I have to see it in the changing room mirror which makes me want to cry, hence very little clothes shopping gets done. I like the idea of a skirt and top but I have a long body so there is the ever present DANGER of someone seeing my tummy.

I need the whole outfit from scratch. Shoes and accessories and everything. I booked a personal shopper but chickened out because I am so clueless. I would pay up to £400 I suppose for the whole lot. I also need to buy it online - it sounds so over dramatic but I just can’t bear going clothes shopping, it makes me miserable for days afterwards.

Any help would be most gratefully received!

Red hair and brown eyes! I’m so jealous, that’s my dream combo.
In the words of Corporal Jones”Don’t panic”! You’ve loads of time, and a healthy budget.
A personal shopper is a good idea because they’ll give you things you might otherwise not usually try on.
Can you give us an idea on your shape? Hourglass/straight/pear?

Blowing the budget a bit on these but simple shoes is all you’ll need.
Here.

www.viviennewestwood.com/en/women/clothing/dresses/long-sleeve-vian-dress-blue-blue-1601001020765K401.html?cgid=women-clothing-dresses#srule=price-low-to-high&page=1&start=9Here?

Is there anything you like from Reiss wedding collection?

This?

Fab underwear is always the place to start, find something like Spanx (or sexier shapewear!) just something that makes clothes sit better on you. I have the same shape body as you by the sound of it, and I find that actually with some super strong shaping pants I can wear all kinds of lovely dresses

www.next.co.uk/style/esl22898

Looks like a skirt and top but isn’t ?

I have a long body and a tummy so I really understand this struggle. I find the best thing is to get dresses which don't have a defined waist line so that it can sit in the right place on you, and then you just need some really good underwear to smooth it out. Dress shopping is the bane of my life, but (depending on the dress code) a skirt and top doesn't usually feel smart enough for real occasion.

Have you looked on the Outnet?
www.theoutnet.com/en-gb/shop/product/maxi-dress_cod5756269973038266.html#dept=INTL_Wedding_Guest_DRESSES_CLOTHING

www.theoutnet.com/en-gb/shop/product/knee-length-dress_cod2307389542166345.html

www.theoutnet.com/en-gb/shop/product/midi-dress_cod2307389542771277.html#dept=INTL_Wedding_Guest_DRESSES_CLOTHING

www.theoutnet.com/en-gb/shop/product/midi-dress_cod7789028784059904.html#dept=INTL_Wedding_Guest_DRESSES_CLOTHING

Or the Pretty Dress Company (not sure where the waist sits on these)?
www.theprettydresscompany.com/shop-c1/dresses-c2/the-pretty-dress-company-dani-bardot-pencil-dress-p280#attribute%5B1%5D=5

www.theprettydresscompany.com/new-arrivals-c12/new-arrivals-c14/the-pretty-dress-company-tilly-off-the-shoulder-bow-pencil-dress-p194

Ooooh LOVELY ideas!!! I think my shape is pear shaped probably but with my awful tummy. I do have some Spanx, and I will dig them out for trying.

I love the Bardot neck ones, and I like the blue flowery LK Bennett one. I used to buy work dresses from Reiss pre babies 😭 and thought I never would again but maybe with my Spanx.... I have never even HEARD of the outnet before but it looks very promising!

I’m on my lunch so not much time for detailed browsing but will look properly later. And THANK YOU ALL for taking the time to help a clueless stranger....

OP the Outnet has been my saviour on a number of occasions! It's where all the end of season stuff from Net A Porter is sold, and sometimes you get an extra 20% off (you do right now with APRIL20).

It can mean you get something really beautiful (and from a fashion forward label which might matter for this wedding) and it doesn't cost anywhere near as much as you might fear.

Alternatively, and this was my approach, I spent the same budget as you and managed to buy a £900 dress that was GORGEOUS and fit the occasion perfectly.

Have a look at Bombshell by Katya Wildman. I wore one of her dresses to a wedding and got loads of compliments, the dresses are beautifully cut to minimise tummy flab!
I looked far smaller than the size 14 I actually am!

I got mine 2nd hand off eBay or there's usually some reduced on the bombshell website.

Ok, after a hiatus where I thought I had found the perfect dress, I’m back, because I haven’t. I robbed it from another thread, it was this one but I’ve just tried it on and my complaints are:
Feels a bit cheap and synthetic
Clingy
Too long.

With this in mind I have looked through all your lovely suggestions again. The Outnet I am finding a bit terrifying but I like:

this although I would rather not black

this although I don’t like the asymmetric hem

this although EEEK that’s short

Any ideas?

I don’t know how to post pics but have you looked at chichi London? If I was going to a wedding I would def take a look on there.

I’ve just had a look - they are pretty but I am worried a) that they are all polyester and I will SWEAT and b) that they are not great for my figure. There are some lovely colours though....

If it helps the Reiss mini dress might not be as short as you think. I’ve bought a few dresses for weddings from Reiss and they’ve always been longer than they look in the photography online and I’m the same height as you OP.

I would book a personal shopper at a department store - where do you live?

That last Reiss one you posted OP is gorgeous and sounds like a fab option!

I could get to Birmingham or Manchester fairly easily but I’m so reluctant to have a personal shopper because I am too self conscious, which I know is ridiculous! I guess the model is probably about 7 ft tall on the reiss website so perhaps it wouldn’t be as short, and it is my favourite. Sadly I will have to wait for my refund to be processed before I can buy another 😂 but perhaps I’ll try that one next then. What kind of shoes would be correct if I get it do you think?

Thanks again for all the advice! Wish I could just actually take you all shopping with me!!