Thought I would add my tuppence worth!
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You can wear a mattifying primer without foundation and it will help the texture, oiliness of your skin. I like Estée Lauder The Smoother, but I use Estée Lauder foundation so I buy them together more out of habit/laziness, I haven’t tried every option going! But it’s nice, lasts all day and doesn’t affect my skin. Body Shop do a similar primer but it broke me out in blemishes.
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Estée Lauder again, the eyeshadow base - they only do the one so will depend on skin tone but I find the colour isn’t very strong as it’s more about the base than the tone (I’m very pale, neutral white skin). I have also used the Laura Mercier Eye basics which has a wider range of shades however I found that it creased somewhat and wasn’t as mattifying.
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I second the Urban Decay pencils, they’re my favourite by far and very soft on the eyelid, I’ve given up on others. However a lot of their tones do have a tiny bit of glitter/metallic to them - it’s not obvious on wearing them, especially as it’s only eyeliner, but some people don’t like that at all. Personally I think they’re great and I wear very neutral/natural make up always.
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I would also recommend Nars blusher. ‘Orgasm’ is a favourite for many, I also like ‘Deep Throat’ (hate the names!). You would need to buy a blusher brush if you don’t already have one.
I’m no help on the eyeshadow front, I only wear it for being dressy and when I do, I use a palette (like Urban Decay Naked) and use several different natural tones. IMO eyeshadow looks much better when you blend with different tones, eg medium shade all over, darker in crease, light tone on centre of lid and arch of brow, then buff.