Shall I take my hairdressers advice and go for a drastic change?

[TFInotmonday]

Hi,

So I'm 34 with very long, thick, dark brown hair, which tbf, has seen better days. I've got a few scattered greys, which are becoming more difficult to ignore. I'm pale and whereas my dark hair used to be quite a striking feature, now I think it's ageing me.

My fashion icon was Amy Lee, but I'm worried I'm looking more Dorien from birds of a feather, these days

I had a consultation a few days ago and I said I was thinking about having a subtle balayage, but she was very blunt about my hair just hanging and said I need all of my hair lightening, plus balayage, plus a proper cut, with loads of layers.

I'm nervous for two reasons.

1. Because I have always played it safe with my hair and am worried I'll really hate it.

1. Because my hair is already quite heat damaged and I'm worried bleaching it will kill it and I'll end up looking worse!

She does have great reviews, but still. Am I just procrastinating? I do want a change, so maybe I should just go for it.

Thoughts please!

Love the balayage picture you linked and I think it would really suit. Definitely go for it, would be very easy to dye back if you didn't liked it!

Arghh I'm unsure again now!

I think layering wavy hair is very risky, you can end up with a wild unstylable mess.

I'd got for chopping a good few inches off and doing some deep conditioning. Blayage is fine but very thin T section low/high lights is better imo.

the balayage looks gorgeous you should go for it.

Go for it - you can always grow it back if you aren't keen, but just do it

Not sure I agree. My lovely long hair cut into a bob back in 2011 (for a change) still hasn’t grown back to its former glory

How about you get the cut - then once you’re used to it, get the colour done. So not too much change at once

Op please don't change it too much, your hair is beautiful! You are never too old to be like Amy Lee, she will always be the best!

I’m naturally black haired with pale skin. About 1/2 my hair is now wiry silver/white. I’d been a red head for YEARS but the last 12 months I’ve not touched it at all and the dark hair looks bloody horrible on me

Sooooo my hairdresser (and close friend) suggested a Brody Dale colour instead. Figure if I can’t be a black haired rock chick any more I can go for the Blonde Brody look Starting on it next week but it’ll take a good few months to achieve.

I think your hair's lovely OP but it would definitely benefit from a bit off the ends, which don't look as healthy as the rest. (Who's do) I think a bit lighter/cooler and ashier would really suit you too, I have have a similar skin tone and hair length to you and I find the darker it is the more it highlights things like under eye circles, I also find purple/red tones difficult with pale akin, they seem to make my skin ruddier, so overall i end up wearing more makeup to avoid those things, which i would rather npt bothet with! Pale people problems eh!

Maybe try the cut first and see what you think? It's worth it just for how much more manageable it makes your hair, I think.

What fresh nonsense is this, a baby of 34 being told she is looking old in her natural hair colour? Are we on the set of Benidorm? (actually can not remember their hair but have a prejudiced idea in my head)

OP I have similar colouring and am lightening up at 38, my skin doesn't seem to have quite the youthful glow it did, and dark brown hair looks too harsh. I'm also trying to wear less black near my face. I'd be tempted to try your hairdresser's ideas.

You've got great hair, OP. I would try the cut first and then see how you feel about the colour after that.

Um... that isn’t a drastic change?...

I thought you were going to be talking about getting it cut short or a completely different colour or something.

I mean, I get that it might feel like one if you’ve always had the same style, but it would take no time at all to get it back how it is now if you hated it.

I think you should have a good chop to get rid of the ends, then consider the balayage / colour.
You are quite pale so you need to be sure a lighter colour will still be as striking (if that’s what you are aiming for?) I’m very dark and have tried going lighter but always end up disliking it or going off it really quickly as I have same colouring as you.

Thanks again everyone I'm going to take everyone's advice and get the cut first. I'm just popping in today to have a look at my colour strand tests. Apparently they took well.

tab, haha I suppose drastic is possibly the wrong word! I think it seems drastic to me, given I get anxious when I have a trim and the hairdresser suggests three inches off, instead of two!

Oh and Rose, I understand that. I don't want it to look boring and lose that striking look of the dark hair, pale skin contrast. On the other hand, I don't want to get stuck in a rut and end up looking witchy, which is where I think I'm heading now.

“I think it seems drastic to me”

I totally get that it might feel like that, I’m not saying it in a dismissive way... just more, pointing out that layers are always just a couple of trims away from being grown out anyway.

So if you don’t like it, it really wouldn’t take that long at all to get it more or less back how it is.

It’s not like trying to grow out a crop or anything.

Yes, very true.

Can I ask though, in terms of damage, is there anything I can do to reduce that? As I say, I already have some damage from heat styling, so bleaching it is still worrying.

I've heard stories of people's hair just snapping off during at the hairdressers! 😬 This was a fair few years ago though, so I'm hoping we've come a way since then...