Anyone else have a very high maintenance body

[Grapetree]

Constantly feel like I’m destined to be unattractive. I know this will all sound rather trivial, but it has a huge impact on my life

I’ve never had a particularly ‘pretty’ face, but I could accept that. Not everyone gets to look like a model, it’s just life
However I feel as if my body is so high maintenance just to look half acceptable. I don’t have time or effort left to bother putting fancy makeup on or dressing up like other ‘normal’ women do. Plus, I’d feel like putting lipstick on a pig etc

Firstly my skin is horrendous, I have seborrhoeic dermatitis (dandruff and flaky skin on eyebrows/nose), stubborn acne, and bad eczema on my body.
Thankfully eczema mostly under control, only experience slightly dry body skin thanks to good dermatologist (cost a fortune though, and I’m sure others with eczema will know how unpredictable the condition is - plus I still follow a very long routine to keep it in remission).
Acne is no longer severe but still persistent, I have horrible skin texture and I’ve had acne since the age of 12 (I’m now mid 20s). I wish I could wake up for once in my life to not have to worry about how my skin looks
I have lean PCOS which is what causes the acne and seb derm, I’ve tried all medications (some slightly worked others didn’t at all) except Roaccutane. However, because I’ve had severe eczema and bad cheilitis in the past my dermatologist doesn’t want to risk prescribing it.

Also, thanks to the Pcos I have very bad hirsutism. I’ve been getting electrolysis for 3 years (excellent hair removal method btw) but I’m still far hairier than the average woman, again it’s costly and painful and something most people just wouldn’t have to think of. I can’t afford to get it done on my body hair so have to shave almost daily, including embarrassing places like my back feet and belly

I have mild Ptosis (droopy eyelid) which has caused uneven eyebrows, and a further lack of symmetry in my face. My nose is very bulbous and masculine too

God I feel slightly pathetic posting this but I’m so fed up of looking like this. I throw more and more money on trying to improve my looks but I feel like a sinking ship

Plus, I do have other ‘normal’ imperfections like dark circles, frizzy hair, big feet, small boobs that normal women seem to complain about but these are the things I can cope with because no one is perfect obviously

I actually think this is normal. I think most women work at being attractive.
I could list all mine and some you won't have and wouldn't think about:
Freckles
I'm very tall (5'11) so clothes shopping is faff but I love clothes
Can't wear heels without being over 6ft
Dry /oily skin - greasy forehead and dandruff
Frizzy hair
Size 8 feet
Wonky nose wonky eyebrows
Not completely straight teeth and some calcium marks
Stretch marks

But there is nothing I can do about it and if I could go back to my early 20s I wish I had the confidence I have now

Pcos here too. If you can take oestrogen based birth control you could ask the gp for Dianette, oestrogen with an inbuilt anti androgen.

I’m waiting for dermatology because at 41 I’ve had the worst outbreak of acne and excess hair. I can’t take oestrogen due to migraine with aura so if I want an anti androgen I need a specific water tablet but it would need to be prescribed off licence and a gp can’t do that.

My dr booked me for next Thursday but the hospital have rearranged it for next February.

I cried for 3 hours when I got the letter.

I just want to be normal too, you get no help with pcos unless you want a child and as dh had chemo that’s not going to happen either.

Ahh, you know I too think it's actually normal, and a sad reflection of the time and money women feel we have to spend to look 'acceptable'.

But you do need to know, it's not just you, so many of us feel we are fighting this battle with our bodies.

I often joke: 'it takes a lot of work to look this average.'

Practical tip for hairiness: get a lumea. It will save you £££ in the long run and you can cover larger areas than electrolysis, and you can pretty much get rid of the hair on those more 'embarassing' areas such as belly and feet over time.

But hair on feet etc is NOT unusual in women. You are not the freak you think you are!

Yes. Me! The sheer time and effort I have to put in to just looking ‘normal’ is phenomenal. Mostly skin related (my skin doesn’t retain moisture so it’s head to toe moisturising with aveeno (whichever costs anbloody fortune too! But it’s the only thing that works), fake tan (not silly amounts, but without it I look so ill. My skin is a horrid natural colour), make up (again, not loads or enough even to look made up - but just to make my face look human). I feel like how I look (averagely pretty if a bit unconventionally attractive) is one big fat lie. Before I cut it short, it would take nearly forty minutes to make my awful hair look like most people’s bad hair day. Now it’s short it looks ok but does nothing for me. And it’s getting harder and more time consuming with age. I just feel unworthy of love because of it (my boyfriend is very beautiful and I can’t quite get my head around why he fancies me?!!). I wish I’d never even started the whole shebang and just lived with the unnatractive me from the start rather than these silly levels of upkeep to look passable.

Glad I’m not the only one, I don’t even talk about this with my close friends

I absolutely relate to this! It feels that I've been lumbered with every single beauty flaw going - that thing about the ugly tree and hitting every branch, yeah. My teens, 20s and 30s were fucking exhausting trying to keep everything in check in order just to appear passable. At 44 I can't really be fucked now though.