I had the same problem.
I have fine straight hair and found that I had "bed head" every morning so I washed and dried it every morning but was sick of the cycle.
Firstly I went cold turkey on the drying. The blow drying was damaging my hair so much that it made the bed head problem worse.
I washed it, conditioned it, put leave-in conditioner in and some Lee Stafford air-dry cream light. Also a spritz of argon oil. I wash it in the evening so it's dry by bedtime. I also bought a silk pillowcase to help with the bed head.
I washed it every other day and at first it was very odd feeling. But after a while my hair started recovering from the no blow drying and got stronger, so I didn't have the bed head every morning.
I have stopped brushing it with a normal plastic/rigid brush as that rips the hair. I carefully comb through with a wide tooth comb and if I have to brush it I use a baby natural bristle brush which is extremely soft (NOT the rigid bristle brushes, even natural ones. Too harsh on fine hair).
Now I try as often as possible to go three days between washes but it's always at least two. My hair has got used to the new routine and as the hair recovers from the damage, it's far better behaved, feels stronger and is probably 70% healthier.
On the rare occasions I want a more streamlined look I carefully straighten the top layers only with a straightener on the lowest setting. I have a straightener which is so cool I can touch the plates (not for long though!) but that low heat is just enough to gently straighten my top layer. I also use a heat protection spray BUT spray in and allow it to dry for 10 mins first. Don't spray then immediately straighten as you will be heating up the damp mist and boiling your hair.
Also I have a microfibre towel. I wouldn't dream of ever rubbing my hair or tying it on tightly. I literally carefully wrap my hair in it and loosely tuck it in and then just press it to my head to blot the water out. Normal towels are too rough.
But it'll start with not blow drying or heat styling, that's the key. It just whittles away your hair and makes it lanker which leads to more washing just to get it to look normal and not kinky/frizzy.
Improve the condition and things will start looking after themselves. Also, I use a protein mask once a week (followed by conditioner - good protein masks are reparative NOT conditioning in themselves so always read the instructions).
It's only now I am really starting to reap the benefits of treating my hair nicely. After all, hair only grows 5-6 inches a year so if you have shoulder length hair that's two years of growing. If you wash and blow every day that's 700-odd washes and heat styling. A lot for fine hair to take. I treat my hair like a silk dress. I wouldn't wash a silk dress in cheap detergent , tumble and iron it on a hot setting every day and expect it to look like new at the end of 2 years. Even thick hair treated badly has lots of damage but it's masked by the volume. With fine hair, every hair counts!!! 
I resent seeing breakage and since I am treating my hair better I see SO much less.