Going grey when you have dark hair

[wheezing]

I’ve naturally got dark brown hair and a sort of Snow White complexion. I’ve dyed my hair on and off since I was about 14 (now mid thirties) for fun and it’s been many different shades over the years and then usually returning to its natural colour for a year or two in between.

I did get highlights and go lighted a few years back. It took about a year to find the right shade as blonde tints - even the ashiest shade - just went ginger in my hair so a lot was bleached which probably isn’t great long term. It was ok, and it looked nice when my hair and make up was “done” but I’m not so sure about every day. It also started not to feel like me. Then I had a baby and I didn’t feel like I could get away for the time it took to do a full head and cut (about 4 hours) until he was nearly 1 and my hair was just hideous with it brown until half way down and then blonde. I got so upset I ended up cutting it all off which was also a bit of a disaster.

Since it’s mostly grown back now and I’ve gone back to my natural colour and starting to finally feel happy about how I look. About 9 months a go I started noticing a few grey hairs so I’ve been having it dyed every 2 months to cover up. Even though it’s literally just a few hairs it’s already fairly noticeable on the re-growth and I’ve been able to see a grey hair prominently in photographs (probably because my hair is almost black). Obviously this is just the start.

I’ve heard that you should go lighter as you get older but I just don’t want to again, and I don’t think I can manage the upkeep until I’m done having children anyway, which I’m not. So what are my options? I just was to avoid a very obvious grey line of re-growth (ok, this is probably a good 8 years away.. hopefully) because I think it looks awful.

How do you pull off dark hair when you start going grey?

I was like you: wanted to stay resolutely dark (I am 46 and started properly noticing the greys about 18 months ago).

Advice from trusted hairdresser was, the upkeep is actually worse if you stay dark than it would be if you go lighter. That’s because the grey regrowth is really noticeable. A friend who stayed dark is getting her roots done every 3 weeks, and life is too short frankly.

I get what you are saying about the blonde bits growing out and difficulties finding the right shade. I am very dark brown so the lighter bits took ages to lighten with the bleach and if the hairdresser had been less diligent it would have gone ginger, not blonde. However, it’s been the best solution.

I still look dark, just less dark, and the colour is around the hairline and under my parting (so no obvious line).

Buy Majirel and just touch up the grey bits as and when. You can measure out the tiniest amounts of this dye so very convenient and inexpensive and the added bonus of being a professional dye.

Yes my Mum dyes her hair dark and it’s her experience that worries me. Like me her hair grows extremely fast (it can be a positive because only a year a go I had my hair so short that my top of my neck was shaved, and now it’s past my shoulders again!) so she constantly has that grey regrowth line and it does not look good. I need to find a different route but the idea of going lighter forever just makes me feel so sad and like I’ll be saying goodbye to a piece of myself.
I think what saddens me most is that I feel like I’ve only just got myself “back” after letting myself go a bit focusing only on my child.
Maybe it doesn’t need to be now and I can enjoy a few years of dark hair and then bite the bullet and slowly add a bit of lighter hair back in gradually.

What patterning of grey do you have?

At the moment just random odd strands and it’s not a big deal.
I have hair quite similar to my Mother though and I know she said once it started it all went quite grey within a few years, whereas I know some people have decades. Hers is all over and just gradually increased - no Caitlin Moran style front stripe.

Not too big a deal to keep on top of then.

I just mix up a teaspoon of dye at a time and use an old make-up brush for touch ups then go over the whole lot every few weeks to freshen up where it has faded.

My cousin has black hair and her grey hairs looked sparkly against i. Looks fabulous. I have dark blonde hair and my grey is less noticeable. Apart from the silver centimetre surrounding my face

If you have a Snow White type complexion - dark hair and white skin. You may be what HOC describe as Bright Winter. They don't recommend highlights as they say the high contrast suits this complexion.

I use herbatint which is a more natural permanent dye and doesn't give a flat all over colour

This woman makes it look stylish howbourgeois.blogspot.com/p/its-gray-hair-party.html but she also employs a lot of tricks and things that are either beyond me or wouldn't do for my work, but it is impressive.

It is a bit of a nightmare. I get an all-over tint in dark brown every 3 months, with a few subtle highlights mostly around my face (I get those done every 6 months, so every other time). In between times (and usually every 3 weeks) I use Root Touch-Up, although it's not ideal as I can't match the shade exactly. It's good enough though to keep me going until the next appointment.

I use lush henna every month. Takes a while but can do at home so quite convenient. Takes about an hour to put in, leave it overnight then 10 mins to wash out in the morning.

I have dark brown hair with grey , did years of dye (for my own amusement rather than coverage) went through all the colour spectrum from black to Donald Trump yellow and back.
Used henna too.

I started on a SP (Superdrug shade 6) but it came out quite dark, so I've gone to 7.73 which is better , the grey look more golden highlight .
I don't get the obvious regrowth that I did before . I was really surprised how long it lasts , I was worried that the dye would all wash out in the shower .

Going too dark is a real "No" ,

Over the past 10 years I have gone from dark brown to completely grey. Once I started going grey I had whole Head colour every couple of months, then had some highlights, then more highlights until I was fully blonde, then once I could see that I had loads of grey, I had it cut shortish and let it grow out. It helped that grey started to become fashionable! People now ask me where I get my grey colour done!
Ps I have a mobile hairdresser which I find much easier to fit in as she can do early mornings, evenings, whenever really, and much cheaper than a salon! (She did work in a high end salon and it cost me a fortune but I stayed with her when she went mobile)

ive never understood why it isn’t possible to just dye the white strands a light blonde colour, so they look like highlights. Kind of like henna but without the orange!

The reason you can’t just selectively dye grey blonde is all dyes contain developer (so the colour penetrates and fixes) and it will therefore lighten/alter all the rest.

Hello there fellow dark to gray. I have dark brown/black hair with a scattering of silver. I've been dye free for 9 months and mostly liking it. There have been a few moments of "bloody hell, get me to the hairdresser" but I have resisted. The main reasons being that dark hair dye makes me wheezy and it seems to be getting worse and I'm also pretty low maintenance so the thought of having to work hard at keeping the badger line at bay doesn't appeal.

I'm happy with it so far!