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How to dress my age

16 replies

losingmymindiam · 19/07/2018 05:34

I am recently showing my age (43) after years of looking young for my age. I'm fine with it - can't help it but I need a change of look! I'm stuck wearing the same combo of jeans, nice tops and trainers that I wore in my 20's. I've never been a massive trend follower but I like to look nice. I just don't know what I 'should' wear these days. Just end up feeling grumpy and mumsy! Any advice?!

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losingmymindiam · 19/07/2018 05:34
  • argh frumpy and mumsy
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8FencingWire · 19/07/2018 06:15

Not sure age has anything to do with it, more like the shape of your body, what colours suit you and what you do.

I prefer dresses, they are easy. I’m dark skinned, I suit most colours, the madder the better, but I prefer navy, black, yellow, orange. Never had my colours done, perhaps this would help a bit?

I’ve got good legs but an extra stone around my waist and thighs. I have to wear A line dresses, skater or sack/box type of cuts otherwise I look disproportionate (because I am, doh). I normally wear block colours but I have all sorts of mad coloured scarves.
HTH?

niceandspicey · 19/07/2018 06:35

What kind of lifestyle do you have?
Children? Do you work? What clothes do you like the look of?

ArghSamename · 19/07/2018 06:43

Do you want to be smarter? I think if you’re comfortable in jeans and tops & it suits your lifestyle then stick with them. If not then I would go to a shop which has different brands and ask for a personal shopper, often it’s a free service and you can have advice on what suits your shape.

thedevilinablackdress · 19/07/2018 07:25

What is this 'should' business?? That's how to suck the joy out of the whole thing.

Wear things you a)like b)that fit and are comfortable and c)work for the life you lead

losingmymindiam · 19/07/2018 08:03

I don't have much of a waist (a couple of spare tires!) so it's probably as much as not feeling comfortable in my own skin but I just feel like I haven't changed my style since my 20's. I like dresses but look either matronly or like a lamp shade in them! I would like to look more 'grown up' but I always go for comfort and feel that makes me look frumpy. I have two older children so don't really get mucky anymore!

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losingmymindiam · 19/07/2018 08:04

*tyres!

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thedevilinablackdress · 19/07/2018 08:15

Can you give yourself a day to spend going round shops in a city? Not thinking about buying, but see what's out there. Go in shops you wouldn't usually, trying stuff on. Do lots of people watching for ideas too. And plenty of refueling stops 😁

ShowOfHands · 19/07/2018 09:12

What is a "nice" top? I see jeans and a nice top as a description all the time and never know what a nice top is. Is there a corresponding "nasty" top?

I'm in the wear what you like camp tbh.

Yewtown · 19/07/2018 09:33

I think it is normal to feel as you do but whilst your body may change shape due to the perimenopause it shouldn't change your personality. If you feel comfortable in jeans and tops why change, a few small tweaks is probably all you need. Swap the trainers for loafers or brogues. I got some lovely rose gold loafers in TK maxx a few months ago and they work with everything. They are Kanna. Change the cut of your jeans, if you wear skinnies or jeggings try straight, slim or ankle skimmers. I'm older than you but still wear jeans most days, just no rips and tears. A silky tshirt or plain linen top looks good imho.

PurpleNailVarnish · 19/07/2018 09:36

I'm around your age and I get it completely.
I don't want to look frumpy either but I know that my hot pants days are over .

Apologies if I'm stating the obvious here.

Go for fewer garments from quality brands, rather than lots of cheaper products.
I'm a big fan of Hobbs, but others include Cos, L K Bennett, Reiss and Jigsaw.

What's your style? Do you like bright colours or neutrals?
Are you looking for work or casual clothes? Either way, what clothes do you need for your lifestyle ie formal office wear/smart casual/jeans and t-shirt?

Rockyrockcake · 19/07/2018 10:18

John Lewis have a style app. You answer a series of questions and they find a style to suit you . I found it useful because I say things on the app that I would not notice in the shop

losingmymindiam · 19/07/2018 10:40

I would define a 'nice' top as one that I like Grin but just a boring striped/flowery/long sleeve tshirt/ jumper type thing! I feel I'm so boring really! I can dress smart for work, it's the non work days that are the problem. And also I don't like anything on my body... I need to sort the shoe situation as I live in trainers and find everything else uncomfortable! I don't think anything suits my shape as I have a thick waist. If I had a small waist I wouldn't look overweight iyswim.

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losingmymindiam · 19/07/2018 10:40

The JL app sounds good, I will check it out.

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PurpleNailVarnish · 19/07/2018 12:43

If you wear jeans casually then a shirt with darts and not too long in the body looks smarter than an oversized t-shirt, emphasises your face and neck and hides your stomach.

Peplum tops can be good for hiding a tummy but when you try it on hold your arms up to check that it's long enough to hide your stomach.

Jeans and trousers should come to your natural waistline, if they cut you off any lower then you'll have a 'muffin top' and feel even worse about your stomach.
Not Your Daughters Jeans are a good fit again, apologies if you know this already they are pricey but worth the money NYDJ
Gap do a range of styles and sizes, go on a quiet weekday if you can and try on everything you like.

What are your good points? If you've got good legs or great cheek bones highlight those.

If you don't like dresses on you have you tried different styles? Skater dresses that drop from the bust, rather than the waist might look good, or drop waist dresses.

If you're anywhere near a John Lewis their personal shopping service is good, friendly and not intimidating.

As a change from trainers shoe boots or ankle boots are comfy and smarter than trainers and they go well with jeans or dresses.

losingmymindiam · 19/07/2018 13:14

Purplenailvarnish thanks - given me a bit to think about. You are right. I have a pair of higher waisted jeans and they look and feel so much better than my others which do indeed give me a muffin top. I have been after the holy grail of shoe for years - one that feel comfy but looks smart. Quite hard to find both things on one! The shows I love hurt my feet and the ones that are comfy are either trainers or old lady shoes!

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