I look like a hobbit and have no money. Help me dress smartly for work? Pretty please?

[JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff]

I am not a pleasant sight.

My twins were born in Feb and any pretensions I had to a waist are long gone. My top half looks like a mediocre rugby player gone to seed and my legs are short and chunky in the manner of a comical character from Dickens, or maybe a stunted chimp.

I have come to the conclusion, after many years of painful confrontations with the mirror, that dresses are my best bet. Not bodycon, cos no one needs to witness that shit.

But tea dresses, smart skater dresses, empire line numbers..... and no floral prints or I look like Hagrid in a curtain. Where to buy for under say £60-70 per item? When the twins hit nursery we will have no cash.....

If you got this far, any help?!

Have you looked at Boohoo? Ok, so they won’t last forever, but your babies are still young so you may still be changing shape. I’ve got dressed with a ruched tummy to hide the mum tum, dresses with wrapping bits (same hiding technique ), swing dresses.... all coming in at under £20 a piece. Avoid the patterns, go with the block colours, look past all the stuff that is only suitable for clubbing, there are some good work dresses.

Uniqlo saved me at this time in my life. Also MUTU online exercise programme graduating to a good physio led pilates class.

Thanks both! Strangely disappointed last time I looked at Uniqlo as seemed to be made for willowy types. Am not willowy. But will give it another crack!

Mutu a good shout and hadn't even heard of Boohoo so thanks for that. I certainly am changing shape, my breasts used to be quite nice but are now basically udders thanks bfing

Any other things I should check out?

Again under your budget but Dorothy Perkins always has a good range of skater dresses. There seem to be quite a few wrap dresses around at the moment too.

Not sure if they would be deemed smart enough, but the Next dresses manage to hide my baby weight 'baby is actually 11 years old

www.next.co.uk/g6390s3#155336

I have a few of the Next dresses as above and they are v easy to wear. Selling out v quickly though.

Thank you all! I last bought clothing before dd1 was born, in 1915 2015 so it is good to have reminders of stuff like Dotty P which I had not even thought of!