Feeling philosophical about s&b today

[Swimminguphill]

Hi everyone,

Not sure if this is really the time or place, but a few recent threads have got me thinking about fashion and influencers and this site, and what it all means to me.

Firstly a big thanks. I have never really ‘got’ fashion or what it means to me. I guess when I was younger I just thought it was a window to my personality which meant an incredibly odd assortment of things that ‘spoke’ to me, whether they fit me or not, or suited me or not. I also generally didn’t see the point in spending money on clothes when I could buy books or go travelling. Fair enough.

Fast forward 15-20 years and I had my kids, realised that I was female and this was different to being male (yes I am slow on the uptake) and this meant my life was going to be different, my choices fewer or at least harder and people’s perception of me influenced by all these things outside my control (mother, not young anymore, career in spasm etc). And suddenly I needed to exert control on something, anything, so I felt like I was in control of my life a little bit (even if midnight wakings, school sports days, childcare deadlines, work inflexibility etc were the real circumferences of my freedom).

And that is where this site came in (and the end of this stream of consciousness thank you). I found out loads of interesting and useful information that helped me kind of re-make myself in my own image. The brand and blogger recommendations were really what did it. I know that there has been lots of controversy recently about this or that blogger, and I get the whole advertising thing, but nothing is more useful than seeing clothes you might posssibly wear on real people who also reflect on their own decision-making process. I know lots of the stuff is gifted but I genuinely wouldn’t have thought twice about the merits of a hip-length vs thigh length blazer before. And when they are promoting new/small brands that I wouldn’t have found otherwise I find it really helpful. And I found it all through this site. The reflections of other mnetters are also really helpful and enlightening, especially when they are expert dressers (I.e. not like me) who innately get it.

That feels like a pretty big deal. I get loads of compliments on my outfits these days, but more than that, I feel well-armoured for the shit that life deals me on a regular basis for no other reason than I’m a woman and I have kids. That feels pretty fucking awesome.

Anyway, happy Saturday people!

I think it's a sign your children are growing up and not all consuming anymore that you can look around and start thinking about yourself again. My youngest is 5 and I finally feel like me again after the baby years. Like you that started with thinking about how I looked and felt and doing exercise regularly, losing weight and buying a ton of new clothes thanks to this place. That led to me thinking about what I wanted to do at work and getting a promotion last year.

I could have written this post myself OP! I love reading through the threads on S & B, and feel I have learnt so much about clothes, fabric, style, fit etc that I perhaps overlooked when I was younger (most things look good on you when you are 21 😊). My early to mid 30's I lost myself style wise, and although I have a lovely life, I wasn't happy in my own skin or in how I dressed. This past year I've been exercising, lost weight, bought new clothes that suit me, and feel so much better about myself. Thanks to all the lovely posters who recommended shops/brands etc!

Wow. I hate fashion with a passion (too disorganised to coordinate) but your OP brought a tear to my eye

Thanks for your post. For me it's a form of self expression. I can't draw or sing or play an instrument but I can play around with clothes and I like doing it.

I’m much older than you, OP, but could otherwise have written your post. Years of extreme chronic pain, hellish work issues, alopecia etc etc had me in survival mode. Eventually I resigned and set up my own business and had quite experimental surgery with miraculous results. After I finally got off the morphine patches I took a good hard look at myself and didn’t like what I was seeing. I was hugely overweight, very thin patchy hair, and didn’t have an item of clothing that sparked joy. Initially I didn’t feel I could tackle the weight, but got lots of support on here to buy nice clothes for the body I had. It was a big deal to spend money on myself because till then I’d been feeling there wasn’t any point. Last May, again with support on MN I started to lose weight and have since lost 5 stone. I also have a completely new wardrobe and a shaved head with loads of lovely wigs. I’ve learned loads about what to do to lift an outfit from meh to polished. I understand HOW to dress better, and how to build a wardrobe that works. Every time I open the doors, it makes me smile -I don’t have masses, but everything I have works and I enjoy wearing. Even slobbing about clothes are of a different standard and put together with some thought. I’ve learned loads from women on here, and from some of the blogs I’ve started to follow, and am trying to work on my ‘eye’ by reflecting on why a particular woman looks stylish, and thinking about how I might make a similar look work. Im loving it - and ironically as I’ve got more confident my business has grown as well. I’m 60, and I feel and look better than I have for 25 years.