Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Style and beauty

Looking for style advice? Chat all about it here. For the latest discounts on fashion and beauty, sign up for Mumsnet Moneysaver emails.

Original poster

help please....I'm scared of bras.

48 replies

AntiqueOlive · 11/04/2018 21:35

I haven't worn a bra for a few decades. I'm very flat chested, and haven't needed to wear one for comfort.

Infact any bra I've ever owned has been very uncomfortable because I could never find one that fitted. I find the nylony straps itchy and the hooks fiddly. My boobs seem very wide apart and never fill the cups. Even a 32a is/was too big. The only time I wore a bra was when I was pregnant/breastfeeding and then I could fill a B cup!

Mostly I've been quite happy being flat - but now with age I'm sort of saggy flat, rather than perky flat....and I decided my clothes might look better if I had some underpinning of sorts.

I've tried vests with "secret support" but they just flatten me further.

So I went to look for a comfy bra which would give me a bit of a boost

But there are hundreds of bras in the shops. :/

The choice is enormous - I honestly don't know where to start! The sizing scares the pants off me and it's like an explosion of nylon and lace and the bras all seemed so - solid! Like polystyrene armour. Its been nigh 30 years since I last went bra shopping and I felt completely daunted and overwhelmed. Too many bras! Too many sizes! Too many styles! Too many colours! Too many bad bra memories! I ran away....

I suppose I'm looking for something like a crop top with a wee bit of padding/shaping, in a cotton mix....

Does such a piece of clothing exist?

Please help me !

OP posts:
MikeUniformMike · 11/04/2018 21:37

Bralette.

KendalMintCakey · 11/04/2018 21:40

God, I've been in a bra since Primary. I've huge boobs. Marks and Spencer / La Senza do some lovely bras.

I always opt for comfort. My bust is huge. I love the soft bras. Would you like to have boobs op? The Asda George 2 sizes bigger are a proper bra (go on try it - you might like it) it's padded and incredibly comfy. At six quid it's deffo cotton mix ...

MinaPaws · 11/04/2018 21:48

M&S do some really comfortable slightly padded cotton bras. I'm 32 D and the other bras I have are too tight by the end of the day but that range is so comfortable I forget I'm wearing them.

parrotonmyshoulder · 11/04/2018 21:52

Measure properly first. Do search for ‘better bra campaign’

dementedpixie · 11/04/2018 21:52

thebetterbracampaign.blogspot.co.uk/p/fitting-advice.html?m=1 measure according to this. You may need a smaller back size and bigger cup than you think

SmiledWithTheRisingSun · 11/04/2018 21:56

https://www.bravissimo.com/products/fancies-bralette-aqua-fy312aqu/

These are lovely op Smile
I would get measured either at Bravissimo or John Lewis. Not M&S.

AnnaMagnani · 11/04/2018 22:13

Measure properly. No one, in the history of Mumsnet bra interventions has ever been a 32A.

LovesMaltesers · 11/04/2018 22:41

Measure under your boobs and pull the tape measure tight. This is where the bottom edge of a bra would sit. This is your band size. If you measure 32, fair enough. But I bet you don't.

I spent years in a 34A cup (old fashioned measuring of adding 2 " onto the actual back measurement.

Now I am in a 30D. I measure 29 under my bust and 35 over. To measure over your boobs, bend forward from your waist and let them dangle, then measure round the fullest part which includes the nipples.

Each inch difference between your back size and 'dangly boob' is a cup size.

so 28 back and 29 cup = 28A
30 back and 32 cup= 30B

If you measure an odd number back, you need to go up or down according to the bra.

You might like a lightly padded bra with underwiring to give some lift.

Original poster
AntiqueOlive · 11/04/2018 23:28

Thank you very much for the replies. :-)

I measured myself as suggested above.

29 - 34. So that makes me 30 D. D?????? what?? no! it's impossible - theres nothing there, any natural padding has been sooked away by babies!

It kind of just makes it even more confusing now!

I was in both Primark and Marks earlier today having a look - maybe I just need to buy a few 30 Ds ( i don't, can't believe it!) and experiment at home. (The thought of trying it on in a shop changing room just brings me out in a hot flush)

Bralet was suggested - it sounds like it should be what I want but when I looked there's too much of it , too much lace and stuff going on. I don't want all that trussing!

Yes, I'd like to have some boobs. I'd like a bit of shape. I could get away with it before but I don't have youth on my side anymore, and I was suddenly very aware of it this winter, wearing a jumper and in the mirror I could see the outline of my flat saggy pancakes underneath.

It's not a part of my body Ive ever really worried about much, but after that mirror experience I'm now feeling very self conscious.

OP posts:
relaxitllbeok · 11/04/2018 23:33

Maybe a stretch bra is what you need - there are lots on Amazon that don't have lace and stuff. Marielle is one brand.

Madcatter · 11/04/2018 23:37

I found the same thing OP. For years I thought a 33a was too big as I seemed to slip out the bottom. Now I'm in 30c or even 28d. My boobs are wide and flat and I always found the 32a horribly uncomfortable. I still have to get the right shape otherwise the bra just sticks out stupidly but the right bra is sooo much more comfy!!

Madcatter · 11/04/2018 23:44

The bigger m&s stores do a good range of different types and not too ££ (though I agree don't get measured there). Also if you want something that looks a bit nicer, their main seasonal designs are available in different shapes/styles ie balcony, plunge etc which helps with the fit when it has to be the 'right' shape in order for you to fill it!

Original poster
AntiqueOlive · 11/04/2018 23:58

madcatter and maltesers - where do you buy size 28 and 30s?

I had a look at the Asda bras as suggested up the thread - and they start at 32, and as I remember it from before, 32 is generally the smallest size stocked in marks etc?

The stretchy bras look good on Amazon, but they are nylon. And I also think they would just flatten me, rather than use what little I have to create a shape. ( But I have ordered one anyway!)

I sound so difficult to please, when everyone is being so helpful - I'm sorry! Im really listening to everyones ideas and advice!

OP posts:
LovesMaltesers · 12/04/2018 08:55

Both John Lewis and M&S do 30 backs. Go to the M&S site and look at the push up bras- they have a pack of 2 starting at a 30 back.

M&S COLLECTION

2 Pack Lace Padded Push-up Bras A-E
Product Line Number:T336994A

LovesMaltesers · 12/04/2018 08:58

COLLECTION by John Lewis Elle T-Shirt Bra, Blue Marl, 30B Online at johnlewis.com

They do all cup sizes for this one.

LovesMaltesers · 12/04/2018 08:59

I order around 4 sizes from M&S as bras do vary. I usually order 30D, 32C, 32D and sometimes 30DD. Free postage, try at home, send back if not right.

SloanePeterson · 12/04/2018 09:03

I really, really recommend going to a John Lewis and getting measured. It was my worst nightmare before I did it, I’m slightly fatter than I should be, have sad wrinkled boobs which breastfed 3 dc for far too long, and stretch marks practically up to my armpits (am a total catch). The woman put me at ease straight away, measured me over my bra and it wasn’t awkward at all. I thought I was a 36dd and I ended up in a 32ff, which sounds enormous but actually really doesn’t look it. It’s changed the way my clothes fit for the better, and they’ll know what kind of bra is best for your kind of boobs. I went to M & S after my fitting to see if I could be a cheapskate and pick up some bras for less money, but none of them fit right and small band sizes and large cups seem unheard of in there. I went straight back to John Lewis and spent over £100 on three Freya bras and don’t regret it at all.

KatharinaRosalie · 12/04/2018 09:26

Check Brastop. 28 back is more or a challenge but you should have enough to choose from in 30D.

thedevilinablackdress · 12/04/2018 10:44

Sloggi do lots of non lacy bralets and non wired bras

Longlunch · 12/04/2018 13:18

I feel your pain op! I am also an A cup flat chested and for years struggled. By miles the most comfortable and have lasted forever that I have purchased is the following:

  • uniqlo: this one is like a top and so soft you do not feel anything and quality is lovey:
www.uniqlo.com/uk/en/product/women-relax-wireless-bra-404117.html

Good luck

dementedpixie · 12/04/2018 14:02

An A cup means only 1 inch difference between under bust and over bust. Are you sure that is your size? (I bet it isn't)

Longlunch · 12/04/2018 15:04

Demented pixed ... well between A and B, in some brands I do not fill the B!
Op - btw I wear cup B of Victoria Secret
But if I try M&S it does not fit well at all and /or fill the cup

dementedpixie · 12/04/2018 15:18

It depends on your back size though. A 32A is not the same as a 36A as the cup size relates to the back size. If the back size of the bra is too big then the cup size will be too small. Have you measured yourself?

Alright1613 · 12/04/2018 16:18

Have you seen the sloggi zero feel bralet (they do a bra top but that one has loads of fabric). My SIL raves about them and is a fellow small chested person.
www.johnlewis.com/sloggi-zero-feel-bralette/p3431858

I also like lots of the Calvin Klein non wired bras. I don’t think wires suit very small boobs from my experience, I’ve never found one to fit.

This is the Calvin Klein style I wear
www.johnlewis.com/calvin-klein-underwear-modern-cotton-cross-strap-bralette/p3211975

GreeboIsMySpiritAnimal · 12/04/2018 16:37

Would this be the sort of thing you're looking for OP?

www.uniqlo.com/uk/en/product/women-wireless-beauty-light-bra-404247.html