I was told this top was "ageing", is it true?

[WatercolourFlower]

I was shopping with my friend today and was having a look at the new stuff in Joules, as they ususally do lovely patterns.
I saw this top and immediately loved it (what a gorgeous and delicate pattern!). I said this to my friend...and she immediately said how ageing it would be. Here's the link to the top, in the cream botanicals print www.joules.com/Women/Tops/Harbour-Print/Jersey-Top/Cream-Botanicals?id=Y_HARBOURPRINT%7CCREMBOT

Is my friend right? I'm not ususally affected by stuff like this and wear what I want, but a man recently said I looked much older than I was and now I'm overthinking things. For the record, I'm 20 years old.

Any advice much appreciated 😊

[Lindy2]

I like it. I'm a lot older than you but I think I'd have liked it at 20 too. At 20 I'd have worn it with heels and jeans or a mini skirt. That wouldn't be frumpy or old lady.

[WatercolourFlower]

@OakIsBetterTho that's encouraging...out of interest what do you wear it with?

[Mummybo88]

I felt whenever I grew my hair that it didn't suit me, that it just hung there if you see what I mean.

Could this be a confidence issue? Maybe you’re scared to change your style/your look because you don’t feel confident enough to. Maybe keeping your hair, the way you’ve always had it, is your comfort blanket, if that makes sense. If this is a confidence thing, I’ve been there. You have to fake it til you make it. The confidence will come in time but don’t let it stop you from trying new things

[WildWindsBlowing]

I think people are out of date about floral things being for older people.

Floral patterns are in vogue at the moment and worn by young models.
www.google.co.uk/search?q=spring+2018+fashions+floral&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiirMvWnIjZAhXLA8AKHdldA_gQsAQI
www.vogue.co.uk/gallery/floral-trend-guide-autumn-winter-2017
www.vogue.co.uk/gallery/best-high-street-winter-dresses-floral

[WatercolourFlower]

Hmm you're right, I think it might be confidence related. I don't think I'm pretty or special, I'd rather quietly blend in as I know that no matter what changes I make, I still won't look amazing. I know I'm slim, but I also hate wearing tight stuff, I feel like everyone is scrutinising me and thinking I looked bad. I don't know, I just feel uncomfortable

[CougheeBean]

I’m 24 and I like it, I have a tattoo similar to the print! I’d wear it to work or family thing or similar, with skinny jeans or tucked into an a line skirt

[OakIsBetterTho]

Normally dark or mid blue skinny jeans with tan Chelsea boots or maybe knee high boots? Or tucked into a skirt maybe. I don't think there's anything at all wrong with not going with every fashion fad and trend, just do you. Fwiw I also like fatface etc 🤷🏼‍♀️ I've never once felt I look frumpy or been told so, but I'm certainly not 'cutting edge' , that simply isn't me, and that's absolutely okay

[SusanBunch]

You're all mad. Looks nothing like what a granny would wear. I would definitely wear it and not look old or frumpy. I love florals.

[WildWindsBlowing]

I bet you are much much prettier than you think, but need confidence.

[AwayAndStuffYourself]

Do you like it? Then buy it, wear it and enjoy it. Life is far too short to spend it worried about what other people think...in 20 years time you will wish that you had always done exactly that.

[Mummybo88]

I don't think I'm pretty or special, I'd rather quietly blend in as I know that no matter what changes I make, I still won't look amazing. I know I'm slim, but I also hate wearing tight stuff, I feel like everyone is scrutinising me and thinking I looked bad. I don't know, I just feel uncomfortable

This is exactly how I felt at your age. You’ve summed it up perfectly. I got myself out of that rut and I’m so glad I did. You are massively selling yourself short. Be proud of yourself and NEVER think you should be someone only worthy of ‘blending in’. Begin with making small changes, if that’s easier for you. It doesn’t happen overnight. Maybe just with accessories to begin with. It’ll take a bit of experimenting to know what you like and what you don’t but just start pushing your boundaries a little. You can work your way from your accessories to your clothes, just buying the odd thing here and there. Post on here if you need a second opinion. Please don’t just try to blend in. I bet your far more pretty than you think

[spankhurst]

I like it, it’s beautiful. It could be worn loads of different ways and not look remotely frumpy.

[WatercolourFlower]

@WildWindsBlowing I really don't think I am...I've never had any male attention and one of my best friends once said 'You're not striking at first, but your personality is lovely'. She said that two years ago and I still remember it now

[loopylobespat]

I’m 23 and I really like it... people have different tastes!

[WildWindsBlowing]

but a man recently said I looked much older than I was
I was wondering in what context he said this?
Do you think he meant older as in 'sophisticated', 'elegant'?
As in serious, grown up?
Or, as in no longer young?

[extinctspecies]

Joules is a shit shop.

I'm 54 and even I think it's matronly.

[WatercolourFlower]

Oh no, he meant older as in ' oh you look older than 20' I thought you were 25'

[Mummybo88]

WatercolourFlower some people are cruel and often it’s because they’re jealous of you in some way. For a so called friend to say something so hurtful, they obviously have an alterier motive. Also, maybe you’ve not had male attention because you’re trying too hard to blend in to the background?

I’m not boasting here, I promise. I just want to show you the other side of things. When I was 19, one hot summers day, I was wearing a denim skirt and a guy behind me said “if I had legs like hers I’d cover them up”. I then didn’t show my legs again until I was 26. 7 years later! I also was at a house party once and I leaned over to grab a chocolate and a guy said “see, that’s why you don’t have a boyfriend”. I’m sure almost everyone on here has a memory of something hurtful like that being said to them in their teen years. It’s almost always untrue and often a jealousy thing. I promise you. Here’s a picture of me now. I really wish I hadn’t let those feelings get to me. I wasted so much time not letting myself be me.

[WatercolourFlower]

I hardly wear shorts for the same reason... You definitely shouldn't listen to them, you look fantastic! On a separate note, your hair is lovely too

[meandmytinfoilhat]

I love it and I'm in my 30s

[HappyLollipop]

It's a little old lady-ish but since your so young you can pull it off, it would look really cute with skinny jeans and high heel boots.

[adayatthebeach]

It’s lovely! I think anyone would look good in that print. Don't over think it.

[Mummybo88]

I don’t mean this to sound boastful. I just want you to know that for years I merely blended in and to be honest, hated how I looked. I had no confidence and believed the nasty things people said. One day I though, fuck it! I started buying things that felt out of my comfort zone a little, I tried new hairstyles and just started living a bit more and now I have so much confidence. I still have all of the same flaws I had before (and a few more after 2 kids) but I’m happy and I’m confident and no nasty comments from anyone will knock that now. You need to adopt this attitude. Like I said, you have no idea how beautiful you are because at the minute, you’re just blending in. Figure out who you are and what your style is and go with it. I promise you, you’ll be happier in the long run ☺️

[WildWindsBlowing]

Mummy88 you are so right.
You look really lovely in that dress Mummy88!
In your case Watercolour I think he may have meant older as in grown up/a woman. That is what I think 25 is shorthand for and that isn't the same thing as being frumpy at all. (Think of Elizabeth Taylor at her height, or Lauren Bacall in Casablanca, even Audrey Hepburn - they all looked more like women than girls.)

[bluebell34567]

I think it is very pretty but expensive, not good value.