Feel really frumpy. Don't look good in anything any more - anyone ever get a stylist?

[Chocolatepudding85]

I sort of know that getting a stylist sounds mental! But is it? Anyone ever got one?

My body has changed post kids. It wasn't the easiest shape to dress before anyway, but now it feels impossible. Everything just looks crap. I wore a new dress today that felt stylish in the shop, but when I saw my reflection out today, I just looked dumpy. And it was almost a bit too young for me with frills etc. It's stupidly left me feeling down this evening despite having a fun day.

It's like I don't know what suits me anymore!

Has anyone ever got a stylist? I'm tempted. I don't want to dress ridiculously cool, just nicely. I just want to be able to feel relaxed in all my clothes!

oh god I know that feeling. What sort of clothes do you like wearing?
whose style do you admire?

I used to (pre-kids) wear dresses all the time. Sort of fit-and-flare and shortish as my legs are the best part of my body. Well, the thinnest part

I don't know what I feel comfortable in now. Probably leggings!!

And god - it sounds awful but I don't know whose style I admire. I don't know! I like sort of hippyish ethereal clothes like this for summer:

And things like this for colder months (minus the hat), but never feel like I can pull them off.

I think I know what I like, I just don't know what's nice on me....(which is why I'm wondering if I should waste a chunk of money on a stylist )

why not go to somewhere like John Lewis and get a personal shopper? I have never done it, but surely it's worth a shot?

I like your style

I think it's free, you just buy the clothes or not

Do you have a good friend whose style you like that you could go shopping with? I had a period a while back where I'd put on a load of weight and felt generally crap, so one of my friends and I had a day out and she pulled things I wouldn't have picked myself but actually looked great. The JL personal shopper is a good idea as there are lots of different brands in there. I don't use it, but Pinterest might be good for pulling together ideas of things you like, maybe following some bloggers, or Instagram accounts too? (I love Instagram and follow a lot of people who have similar styles to me so I can steal outfit ideas.)

Oh, and by good friend I also mean "brutally honest" friend. I only really have one, true shopping friend - she's the only person I would be happy to buy me clothes as a gift - and we can essentially do a visual sweep of a shop in 30 seconds and know whether to venture further. With other friends I would be like, "the shape is nice, but it's not really my cup of tea, but...", whereas with my shopping friend we would both say, "no, that is awful, next" which sounds horrible but is actually very, very useful.

can i borrow your shopping friend please judy?

She's the best, rick. Annoyingly we now live in different cities, but when we're together we are the shopping dream team.

I am in my fifties and over the last 35 years I have had a personal shopper many times. The first time I was in my twenties and I paid about £50 (a smalll fortune then) for someone to style me and make me look more mature! Nowadays I have a free personal shop at John Lewis every few years They shake me out of my dowdy comfort zone and open my eyes to new looks every time.

'The last one I had was June this year and she recommended several dresses one of which I rejected saying it was 'too short, too young, I would never wear it' . I went back two weeks later and bought said dress and have worn it to three functions since then. When I came home last week wearing it my 21 yo DD did a total double take and said 'Mum, you look so chic'.

I'm trying to persuade a friend to become a stylist for this reason. I have one shopping friend who rocks and is very "nope, looks awful- next" and I love her for it. I think personal shopper is a good idea to at least try new styles

Getting a stylist/personal shopper is a really good idea, much better than shopping with a friend. They will already know what is in all then shops, will know how to work to your budget, and can, if you want this bit, come and look at what you've already got at home and help you buy things to make more outfits.

I'm not one, and have never used one, but I do know two friends regularly use a stylist and love it.

Thanks rickoshea! I hadn't thought of personal shopping in John Lewis. I don't know why! Also I'm the sort who'll nod along, buy it, then if I didn't really like it, take it back to a different branch and never go to that one again!

judy - I wish I had one of these friends! Hmm... I might, but she doesn't live in the same city as me.

liiino - so great to hear your experiences!!

I sort of want one of those who come and look at what I already own too, and help me clear it my existing wardrobe out and figure out the gaps and help me fill them with new stuff...

Where are you, chocolatepud?

I'll be your shopping buddy

Also, try the book Style Statement by Carrie McCarthy and Danielle LaPorte. Helps you pinpoint where you are and what your style is.

Haha thanks mumbod! I'm North London!

Ooh will check out that book right now! See if it's on kindle...

Ah, bit far...

www.highstreetstylist.com

This lady often likes my posts on Instagram although I don't actually follow her. I like her style. I should follow her. She's Kent so maybe not too far?

Oh, and she will look at your wardrobe first if you want.

Thanks judy! I will have a look at her!

I had a house of colour style day following a colour analysis. It wasn't cheap but my teenage son said it made me look 10 years younger.
She also can go through your existing wardrobe to establish what to keep, ditch and buy to pull everything together.
It also saved me money in the long term as I don't make costly mistakes