Wedding Attire Etiquette - Hat or Facinator

[twelveyeargap]

Hello. My friend has received an invitation to a wedding which says "ladies head dress preferred". Friend is wondering whether a facintaor counts, but I think if they bothered to mention it, they probably want ladies to wear hats.

Any thoughts?

Incidentally, since they mentioned attire on the invite, I have also suggested to her that someone (mother of the bride perhaps) is likely to be affronted by white/ cream/ black worn at the wedding and by bare shoulders at the church and ladies removing their hats before the mother of the bride. (My mother is a bit like this).

Any other tips?

Ho, hum... Well my "Debrett's New Guide to Etiquette and Modern Manners" says that attire should never be mentioned on the invitation; it's a huge faux pas. From this alone I must surmise that the family in question do not have a vast knowledge of wedding etiqutte and therefore just want the women to "dress up".

Add that to the fact that it has emerged that the bride "...is a real girly girl. She loves pink. Even her wedding limo is going to be pink!" and I realise that all my worrying about etiquette is most likely, completely unfounded.

One of my colleagues recieved an invite to a friends wedding with an information pack, which also included appropriate dress hire outlets and which route finder website you should use.

There will be tears before bedtime.

Good Lord. That's taking it a bit far!

Wait 'til I tell you about the hen weekend! They've all recieved instructions on what they should wear, and when.

Just a quick note to say, DD (age 3) and I had a great time trying on some very nice fascinators in Debenhams today. Didn't know they were called that though!