Ageing and looks/style (or lack of it)

[Tagetes]

Is anyone else feeling less secure about their looks and body shape as they get older but caring more about it? It's really starting to get me down.

It's not like I've ever been particularly attractive or stylish, but when I was younger I just cared less and got on with life. Then late 40s I lost weight and tried harder with clothes and knew I looked OK. Now what with the menopause, putting on weight again (real spare tyre territory) and the prospect of retirement (which should be a positive thing but there will be fewer reasons not to slob around in trackie bottoms all day long and less justification or wherewithall for spending on clothes) it's getting worse again.

I thought I would be getting into the eccentric old woman territory by now and not give a shit. It's not like anyone will be looking at me! So why do I care? And what can I do about it?

This is the thread you want.

Fairly wide-ranging and strangely comforting ...

Oh yes I think a crisis in confidence is fairly common around 40 ish. I'm faking it until I make it in all areas work, home, kids, the lot

I know what you mean. I try and see it as liberating and I'm certainly far more adventurous with my clothes than I was pre menopause. As you say, there's no-one looking so I may as well have some fun.

I do worry a bit about having less money for clothes when I retire but I tell myself I'll have more time to go hunting for those charity shop gems that everyone but me seems to find. I also plan to learn how to make stuff myself.

To be honest, I don't think Style and Beauty is always the best place to be when you're feeling insecure because there's so much fear of aging on here. It does get me down sometimes and, on occasion, I've had to step away for a bit. So far, I've always come back!