Help me look like this woman I saw in the street!

[HeyNonnyMaybe]

Trudging along in the rain the other day in flat boots, jeans, and sensible knee length waterproof school run type coat.

Then this woman hoved into view looking fabulous with her bob in a beany hat, egg shaped woolen coat, midi length flared skirt poking out of the bottom of it, woollen tights and ankle boots. She looked like she should be in focus at the front of a slow motion shot whilst the background blurred out and a Jacques Brel soundtrack played.

She looked fab, everything was coordinated in terms of colour, she looked really cosy but actually fucking stylish, rather than me galumphing along.

So, I've decided enough with the jeans. I want to look feminine, chic, perhaps a little boho. Not like I've just raided the rails of White Stuff or Fat Face. I used to be so much braver with clothes but now I'm mid 40s, short and a bit fat, so this could be a challenge. I'm aware an egg coat would make me look like an actual egg. And I don't want to be the sort of middle aged woman who puts in pink highlights and wears zebra print DMs because they're "fun".

Any suggestions of where to get the type of clothes I'm on about? I don't mean necessarily copies of hers, it's more about being more original and somehow, oh I don't know, lovely.

[SkyWasMadeOfAmethyst]

This label is really good. It is the same designer from an old brand called Baby Ceylon who had shops in London. Not cheap but everything lasts forever and never goes out of style and it's on sale! Feather and Bone

[HeyNonnyMaybe]

Will try Zara.

It seems there's a whole tribe of us who can't find anything to wear, having let ourselves go so spectacularly. Gone To The Dogs™ will make a fortune.

Urgh Norbert, I hate school mums like that. There's one at our school who only wears black. She is ghostly pale, with brunette hair and she's slim with long legs. In the summer she swans about with that languid near death thing going on, all black sunglasses, ballet flats and a black t shirt tucked into black jeans. She looks fucking fabulous whilst I'm trudging along with a cardiac red face, chafing thighs and the puffy ankles of a long submerged corpse.

Bless you Lying for the encouragement, but sadly no, as has been established, I don't look great.

Sky, I quite like those clothes!

cissy, surely you could get some sort of grant for helping out the needy? I think I'd be too embarrassed to get someone to come shopping with me, if they didn't already work in the shop.

I think it boils down to the clothes and looks I like just not being right for my age, shape and posture.

[bigbadbarry]

Cissy you can give a hint which bit of th country you are in :)

[Idoneapoo]

If its plus size Boho youre after, then the go-to has to be Joe Browns www.simplybe.co.uk/shop/page/joebrowns/show.action They also have a separate line for size 16 and under too. I tend to shop for this second-hand on ebay though s theyre a little ricey and Im a pauper!

[Idoneapoo]

as they`re a little pricey

[HeyNonnyMaybe]

Gosh I love this dress.

[HeyNonnyMaybe]

Too short, I can't wear anything that finishes above the knee unless it's tunic length and I wear it with skinnies or jeans. I like the fabric though, although not the tan belt.

[Whatthefoxgoingon]

I bet you're a thousand times funnier than Languid Deathly Pale Lady though Nonny.

[HeyNonnyMaybe]

puggle any suggestions for the slouchy tote bag you mentioned?

[laterthanuthink]

Had a look in Zara the other day and everything was beautiful - classy, chic, lovely cuts and fabrics. Also, not as expensive as I'd thought. Worth a go, anyway

[Bambi47]

Knitted dresses with long boots and thick patterned tights. If your shorter a wedge boot is nice and comfortable. Flat boots always make you feel frumpy if your shorter. Skinny jeans with ankle boots and hip length coat. Tunic tops with leggings and long boots.

[Bambi47]

I love asos

[SirChenjin]

Just did that John Lewis thing - apparently I should be wearing lots of lace dresses . Is there some algorithm which says 'over 45 you say? Better point her in the direction of pastel lace frocks'.

[Dudess]

Oh, this was me a few years ago! I squished my Size15 self into jeans and those jersey tops that encouraged overhang! Then I discovered dresses and leggings (during pregnancy!) and have built up a fab collection of frocks that make me twirl!

I still balls up every now and then (bought a hideous dusky pink dress in Next on Boxing Day, but it was 6am 😄). Rule is, if it doesn't make me do a little dance when I put it on, I don't buy it. That, and if you find something you like, buy three of them!

H& M do gorgeous key pieces; buy Grazia or Red magazine for Spring inspiration which will hit the shops in the next week or two, and buy lots of either white long-sleeved vests, and strappy vests, to wear under dresses until the sun comes back!

[renzen]

Hi, I follow a blog called does my bum look 40 in this, google it, has some great fashion looks and suggestions.

[UterusUterusGhali]

Marking place.

I look like a potato but in my head I'm still a size 8 17 yo. :(

[cissyfuss]

bigbad East Midlands is my stomping ground...

[RickOShay]

I think at some point you just have to face facts. I have just ignored getting wrinkled and less lissome until about 6 months ago - I am almost 48 - as if it wasn't really happening. What helped me accept my middle aged self was doing a course where people accepted and respected me for the person I am now, rather than the one I was. I try hard to value myself. This then means that I spend time thinking about clothes, as I do not think clothes are superficial but rather instrincally linked to your sense of self. Luckily I have lost a bit of weight in the past year which has also really helped. The you today is as wonderful as the you of yesterday, just more grown up, and that is a Good Thing, I would not go back to my 20 yo self. I take the wrinkly neck and stodgy waist and finally God a bit of confidence, over the desperate insecurity, but lovely and pert.

[HeyNonnyMaybe]

You speak sense, Rick. Generally my life is in a good place, but like most of us could benefit from a bit more confidence. I really do need to lose weight, I would definitely look better if I did, but I find it difficult, as I'm sure do we all. It's that perfect storm of having put weight on and being older, isn't it, suddenly a plump pretty face is jowly and tired looking, and a curvy waist pre kid is now barrel shaped.

That blog has some pics of nice clothes, renzen, I just hate reading blogs, can't get on with the layout or something. I'll persevere though, there are great clothes on there.

Dudess, you're a trailblazer, I hope to follow in your dress-clad footsteps. Where do you get your nice dresses?

Yes Sir, that algorithm is clearly designed by some peppy 23 year old who thinks everyone over 40 needs to dress as if they're Kathy Beale after she's gone up West to get herself sumfink nice.

[SayAGreatBigThankyou]

This is so helpful. I am guilty of the Merrel coat on the school run and then to work, and feel soo daggy.
I had a style consultation, and I can see how it should work, but my style type is incongruous with my lifestyle (toddler mama) so I still have no idea what to wear.
Nice dresses and boots could be the way forward. What do you think of these boden boots?

[TwoTonTessie]

Your posts are hilarious and this thread is inspiring nonny
I am short,approaching 50 and want to change how I look. In the last 6 months I have dropped 3-4 dress sizes and currently live in skinny jeans and boots. I also always wear trousers for work but fancy wearing skirts or dresses now I am slim. I have a real problem with shoes though - I never know what to put on my trotters feet

[HeyNonnyMaybe]

Gosh, I've just bought some trousers recommended on that blog! Not quite a feminine dress, but at least it's not jeans and a jersey top.

[HeyNonnyMaybe]

I think they'd be OK on other people, SayAGreatBig, but I think I'd look very Jo Frost in riding style boots, particularly if with a pencil type skirt. As a matter of interest, what was your style type?

Glad to be of assistance Tessie. You've done amazingly well to lose 3 - 4 dress sizes. If I did that I'd be at my dream size. I actually find shoes the easiest thing in terms of style, but the heavier I get the fewer styles are actually practical, anything with a thin sole is out.

[TwentyOneGuns]

Marking my place to check out all these links later. As a 40 something, fatter than I'd rather be but still wanting to look nice type I think this thread could be very handy :).