Omg just been given the worse insult - time to do something about my appearance!

[Simplemind]

Fast approaching my 40th. Mentioned to someone that I had a big birthday coming up and was asked when I turned 50!! Ahh. I am a size 6 so a bit underweight if anything. Motherhood has really made my skin terrible. I'm spotty but wrinkled and haggard. Really need to sort my skin out. Any tips please as now feel pretty old!

This thread has lots of advice on it.

Oof, that's not very nice, they're a twat btw, you never guess someones age for this exact reason.

What's your budget for improvements? We could advise anything from facelifts and lasers to creams from superdrug really.

I wouldn't have guessed your age, ever, but I wonder if you kind-of led her to that conclusion?

I know 30 is a big birthday, and 50, but I didn't think 40 was. I'm not sure why...I suppose all the "tens" are big, but 30 and 50 seem landmarks. Perhaps she thought the same? It might not be a reflection on how you look at all.

Thanks all. I think I am just feeling a little sensitive about the milestone. Not huge budget and no surgery but would love advice on skin care that really works. I know it's my fault as only really just use make up removal wipes and water on face. No moisturisers as just make me soo spotty.

You said you are a bit underweight. Carrying a few extra stone pounds takes years off you IME so tuck into some chocolate.

I would Chica but have reflux so loads of food are off the menu - including chocolate :-( . I would to put on a few exta pounds. I think it would help plump me out but have given up trying.

No alcohol and loads of water.

I quite like James Duigan and his Clean & Lean Diet - not just for losing weight, but for making skin glow.

Simple that is rotten. There's no need for people to be rude is there?

I felt wretched after my last baby so have honed my ability to make myself feel better. My top tips....

Drink plenty of water, cut back on the coffee, tea and booze.

Take a really good multivitamin and mineral (like an A-Z type one) and high dose fish oils every single day. You need something with at least 250mg DHA and EPA in it. The best tip wrt to supplements is to actually take them, not just buy them and leave them in the cupboard!!

Superdrug vitamin e hot cloth cleanser is brilliant, cheap and apart from the scent, almost exactly the same as very posh Liz Earle stuff. If you use it every night your skin is bound to look better.

Moisturiser with SPF of at least 15 for daytime and a night cream with niacinamide in it. Olay total effects is good and often on offer.

Exercise that you like gives a glow to your face and makes you feel happier and more relaxed.

Every day no matter what's happening I put some BB cream and mascara on and then I feel like I can face the world.

Hope some of this is helpful

Are you sleeping enough, or well enough? If not, then I think sorting that out would probably make a bigger and faster improvement to your appearance than anything else.

On skincare, the Boots Protect and Perfect serums are very good and reasonably priced.

Does your reflux affect your ability to absorb good fats? Avocado, salmon and flaxseed all have a good effect on skin health, apparently.

And that 'mother of young children' face does improve with time, so my older sister assures me!

I don't honk the person had total foot in mouth syndrome and is probably feeling awfUl!

You need to take up a proper skin care routine you do morning and night-
Am-
Cream cleaner with hot cloth
Eye make up remover
Glycolic fruit acid cleansing pads
Serum
Moisturiser with spf 15

Pm
Cleansing as above
Serum
Retinol face cream
Eye cream
Sometimes a faciAl oil on top.
I'm 38, but am told I look about 25!!

Some good tips here but I think you really must moisturise. I had problems when younger with spots and greasy skin and was reluctant to moisturise but as you get older your skin really needs it. I think you need to keep trying moisturisers until you find one that suits you. I also remember realising that I could just put a very thin layer of moisturiser on - sounds silly but helped me!

its expensive but I like Clinique dramatically different just because it is so light. I also use facial oil at night now which I thought was crazy but actually has made my skin much softer. But use very sparingly!

Try to shake it off, it's strange how the insults cut deep but we shrug off the compliments. You probably don't even look fifty, in my experience there is a huge gap between these decades and it's very rare someone actually looks ten years older than they are, even though we sometimes feel it. Aldi wrinkle cream is amazing and very cheap, I use their day and night cream with a gentle scrub and I have seen definite signs of improvement. I'm also a fan of Superdrugs Hot Cloth.

I got asked if I was my youngest DD Grandma ... I thought I was doing OK. I did my best to ignore... then started using No.7 serum. I think it's helped.

I use retin A (you can buy online and it isn't expensive) 3 or 4 times a week and that helps spots and wrinkles (it does make things worse before better though and you do have to use it carefully). Also an acid toner. I also agree with others to try to put on weight if you can - lots of good fats like olive oil and avocados or whatever you can eat that doesn't make your reflux worse. And moisturize using a moisturizer specially formulated for spot prone skin. You can also use jojoba oil - meant to be good for spots.

i looked ten years older when i was a size eight than i do now as a 12.

It might just be that. They do say that you need to choose face or figure once you get closer to 40.

Or just try not to worry about it. Theres nothing wrong wit getting older.

Drink plenty of water
Eat (if you can) avocados, walnuts, tinned sardines packed in oil, olive oil on salads and on steamed vegetables.
Facial exercises ( I do Louise-Annette's Ageless if you Dare as very quick and easy)

If you have spotty skin I would recommend LaRoche Posay effaclar its the best skin care range I have ever used,its in larger boots and its a really gentle but effective range.
But as with anything you have to do it daily.
I hate age guessers..it never ends well

Ditch wipes except for occasional use, I think. A proper cleanser is much better.

I bet you look blissfully elegant and a mere slip of a thing, rather than 'underweight'.

I can't use facial moisturisers either. Be thrilled - it's a sign your skin will last well.

Mind you I slaver on body moisturiser and hand cream virtually non-stop. Takes 0 time when you get the habit. You do actually feel and look better as a result.

As for ageing, everyone's got a favourite insult. An assistant in Topshop suggested 'Those shoes might be more suitable for your granddaughter'. I was 33. My best friend added helpfully that, although evidently withered, I must also have a pramface. I suggest you make what that woman said yours.

put it down to poor eyesight and forget about it.

eat as well as you can - due to your health problems, speak to your doctor about whether it would be worth taking supplements.

use sunscreen. (real sunscreen in summer, not silly creams with fake French names) Don't smoke.

nothing else makes any difference to skin.

I could never use moisturizers either, my dermatologist said as long as I was using sunscreen during the day it didn't matter. However, when I reached 40 my skin was getting drier. I use Balance Me serum at night (I don't use moisturiser) and my skin loves it.

OP, you've had plenty of skin care advice already, so my advice is a bit different.
I'm hazarding a guess that the wrinkled and haggered is more how you feel about yourself than how you actually look.

Do you get your hair styled? if not treat yourself to a salon visit and then go round some makeup counters, perhaps book a free instore personal shopper appointment too, depending on where you can get to, for some style advice.
Sometimes you can be prompted to go outside of your comfort zone and sometimes fresh eyes persuade you to try on things you dismiss on the hanger.

You need a bit of a boost and your confidence rebuilding and you need to put the other woman's comments out of your head.

Right, my advice is different too.

Sod the skincare. If you're spotty too then all these serums/moisture posers may make acne worse.

I eschewed all skin products, exfoliate with a natural product twice a week and eat shitloads of nuts, fish, coconut and olive oil, and as much fresh veg as I can. I sleep well and walk whenever possible.

I've seen an improvement over the weeks and I swear even my wrinkles are disappearing. And it's not cost me much...the money saved on giving up sugary snacks has been spent on better food instead.

Err the Op asked for skincare recomendations... Special subject, try not to be bitchy if you can't spell French pharmacy brands

[err] OP didn't mention skincare products specifically in her post. There's more to skin health than load of synthetic chemicals and money into one's face.