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Style and beauty

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Original poster

Are you a slave to fashion, even if it doesn't suit you?

33 replies

thisthatntother · 17/05/2015 11:32

Sat in a pub people watching last night and saw a very, very large woman wearing extremely short cut off denim shorts, black leggings and flip flops. She was quite pity, but her outfit made her legs look horrendously big and tree trunk like.

Shorts showcase the legs, so surely if your legs aren't your best feature - why have them on display? Why not emphasize an area that does looks good?
Don't people dress to suit their shape anymore?
Is it a case of ''well it's in fashion, I'm wearing it whether it suits me or not''.

The patterned harem pants that are in the shops don't do anybody any favors, large or slim. But loads are wearing them.

I know my views are probably old fashioned.
It's probably a good thing that people don't care how they look in things any more? Body confidence and the right to wear what you want without being judged - and all that?

OP posts:

Googlers123 · 17/05/2015 11:44

I don't think that people don't care how they look, thts a bit harsh. I have a friend who is a size 18, she says that's she's not going to look perfect in anything so she wears whatever things she likes whether it's high fashion or not. She looks great because she has confidence and carries herself well . I say good for her, why should she have to cover up because she's not slim??

NightsOfGethsemane · 17/05/2015 11:54

Well you've pretty much labelled her a fashion victim without knowing anything about her haven't you? Perhaps she felt confident/comfortable in the shorts and leggings combo? Perhaps she doesn't give a toss whether strangers approve of her outfit or not?

Those harem pants you're so scathing about are very cool and comfortable in hot weather BTW.

Original poster

thisthatntother · 17/05/2015 11:57

But she didn't look great. That's the point. It had the opposite effect, the shorts/black leggings combo made her legs look like 2 extremely large, squashed black sausages.

I'm overweight, especially my bum, hip area and around my legs (classic pear) so I wouldn't want to emphasis my bad bits.
In the summer I wear a lot of sundresses, not shorts. Shorts don't suit me, but dresses do.
I wear things that suit me and can't understand why others don't do the same.

I'm obviously of the wrong era

OP posts:

Itsalldramarama · 17/05/2015 11:58

Each to their own I say ! As long as you like it and feel comfortable wear what you want ! I have a friend who is a size 20 and so body confident where as I feel huge and unattractive if I go up to a 14 ! She rocks every thing she wears so body confidence is the key really and damn what other people think , if you feel good that's what counts

Original poster

thisthatntother · 17/05/2015 11:59

My pyjama bottoms are comfy, but I wouldn't want to wander round the streets wearing those

OP posts:

Bostonpj · 17/05/2015 12:04

DH thinks my harem/jogger pants look like PJs but they're so comfortable! However if I took his fashion advice on everything I'd struggle to find anything suitable So long as it's not offensive people should wear what they like.

Googlers123 · 17/05/2015 12:07

You can say she didn't look great op but that's your opinion. What would you have this "very very large " woman dress in? A tent?

Original poster

thisthatntother · 17/05/2015 12:11

It is good that people have more confidence nowadays. But I still think that when you're getting dressed it doesn't hurt to bear in mind what suits you and what doesn't suit you.
Why wouldn't you want to look the best you can?
Why wear something that doesn't do you any favors?

OP posts:

SnotQueen · 17/05/2015 12:13

You think she didn't look great.
Maybe she thought she did.

Original poster

thisthatntother · 17/05/2015 12:13

You can say she didn't look great op but that's your opinion

Exactly, I agree it was only my opinion.
If she thought she looked great and felt comfortable, then that's all that matters at the end of the day.

I only wrote on here because it's the style section, and it got me thinking about style and what is style etc.

OP posts:

MamaLazarou · 17/05/2015 12:15

People have more confidence nowadays, eh?

Original poster

thisthatntother · 17/05/2015 12:15

and fashion

OP posts:

Googlers123 · 17/05/2015 12:16

So at a size 14, I suppose according to a lot of people, I am a bit too big to wear skinny jeans, mini skirts, skimpy things. I refuse to dress older than I am, or more boring than I am, or less fashionable than I want to be. I don't look like a model but I like having fun with clothes and I wouldn't take that enjoyment from a woman who was a size 28 for example

TheAwfulDaughter · 17/05/2015 12:17

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Original poster

thisthatntother · 17/05/2015 12:33

So at a size 14, I suppose according to a lot of people, I am a bit too big to wear skinny jeans, mini skirts, skimpy things

Googler, This lady was WAY over a size 14 (14 is skinny imo) I don't like using the phrase, but she was morbidly obese
I thought that what she was wearing looked strange, on someone that size and wondered why a person would wear something that in my (obviously outdated) opinion didn't look good on her and wasn't doing her any favors.
But as I said, that is purely my opinion.
Which isn't necessarily the right opinion.

This is Style & Beauty section. I had some thoughts on it and posted.
It would be boring if we all agreed.

OP posts:

IsadoraQuagmire · 17/05/2015 12:48

TheAwfulDaughter She didn't have the sun on her legs though, the OP said that she was wearing black leggings with the shorts.
I know what the OP means. It seems only logical that people would want to wear styles/colors that flatter them and emphasize their best features, rather than something that draws attention to their less perfect parts.
I wouldn't call that woman a fashion victim though, it's not a particularly fashionable outfit. I expect she just likes the way it looks.
Sometimes it's nice just to be comfortable and harem pants do look very comfortable (but I think they're ugly too)

Googlers123 · 17/05/2015 12:50

I appreciate that she was larger than that, I went on to say that I like having fun with clothes, and this pleasure shouldn't only exist for thin people. People who are larger or evenly morbidly obese should be able to have fun with clothes if they want. Still genuinely interested to know what you think she should have been wearing whih would have been flattering. As I said previously, my larger friend is of the opinion that nothing flatters her particularly well, clothes seem to be made for thin people, people judge even a size 14 for looking horrendous in skinnies, sausage legs, parsnip legs we hear a lot on mn for example. If she's going to be judges then she may as wear what she bloody wants. And she rocks it.

dexter73 · 17/05/2015 13:03

That's the problem with opinions - not everyone shares yours! So you think 'why are you wearing that as it doesn't suit you?' but she is thinking 'I think this shorts/leggings combo looks really good!'. She might care very much about how she looks and is wearing an outfit that she thinks looks good.

HappyGirlNow · 17/05/2015 13:03

OP, talk about anything relating to other women's weight and you'll likely get hammered...

I get what you're saying. Round here there are loads of overweight women who seem happy to wear anything however unflattering. I have thought in the past that maybe if you're very overweight you just stop bothering what people think/how you look and just wear whatever you feel like (a PP alluded to that). I compare that to myself - if I've even put on 1/2 stone and have a bit of a muffin top I won't wear anything that accentuates it.

I suppose we're all different and fair play to those who don't care what others think. it must be hard to be very overweight these days and be judged constantly (but we all do judge whether we admit it or not!).

Original poster

thisthatntother · 17/05/2015 13:23

Still genuinely interested to know what you think she should have been wearing whih would have been flattering

Instead of cutoff denim shorts with black leggins, why not a figure skimming tunic top, with black legging?
I think it was the shorts part of it that looked odd.

Thanks to the ones who see where I'm coming from.
Even if people don't agree with me, taking things personally and resorting to insults stifles debate.

OP posts:

TelephoneIgnoringMachine · 17/05/2015 13:27

No. I wear what I like, what fits and feels comfortable. I only wear fashionable stuff if it happens to coincide with the aforementioned requirements. And even then I try to go for the toned down/classic looking stuff, instead of the latest thing, as I don't have lots of money for clothes & can't afford to chuck it in 6 months when it's no longer fashionable.

Googlers123 · 17/05/2015 13:28

No one has resorted to insults.
Maybe she was bored to death of the tunic leggings uniform which is seen as the only option for larger women

chanie44 · 17/05/2015 13:52

I try to wear what's fashionable but versions which suit my figure and style.

However whether something suits someone is subjective. For example, in some West Indian and African cultures, a fuller figure is seen as desirable, so her look may well have been fashionable.

IsadoraQuagmire · 17/05/2015 14:00

I suppose I'm thinking more of what suits or flatters a person, eg colors and lengths etc (nothing much to do with what size someone is)
Having said that, now I'm in my late teens I've filled out a bit and I'm usually a UK size 8. When I was a bit younger I was a 4 or 6 and I was self conscious about my collarbones sticking out, and liked to cover them up if possible!

And, although it seems odd to me, some people really don't know what colors suit them, I've heard them say so. I can hold 2 tops up against me while looking in a mirror and immediately see that I look better in one color than another (unless they're both colors that suit me equally) I always assume other people can do the same thing, but apparently not everyone can naturally do this.
Same with length of skirt/shorts, everyone has a length that flatters their body shape more.

Then again, some people prefer to wear something they like even if they'd actually look better in something else.
My ex-bf dyed his hair black and colored the front part of it pink. I asked him why not blue, as it would look so amazing with his very blue eyes, but he said he preferred the color pink so that's what he was going with.
And I see a LOT of people with dyed blonde hair that really doesn't work with their skintone, but it's their hair!

stonelog · 17/05/2015 14:28

The point is, and to answer OP's post, some people dress for others, some people dress for themselves. And some of us vary between the two depending on their mood (me!).

Personally I say bugger fashion, I'd rather just wear what suits me and what I like. That means clothes shopping on the High Street is a complete bitch but I'm more comfortable with what I do end up with.

To echo everyone else, as long as everyone is comfortable (either because they know they look good to others, or because they're happy that they feel good in themselves) then everything is gravy. What is sad is when people get anxious that they don't look good enough for everyone else - and worry that everyone is judging them - I've been there, and it's not something I'd wish on anyone. /self-righteousness!

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