OK, I am not the Bride, only a BM. There are 2 of us - aged late 30s and early 40s. One size 8, the other 18 (16 hopefully by then). Both have ample cleavage (not "down to your ankles" droopiness, but still large enough to need decent support - and I know that we are unlikely to get any sort of strapless or stick-on options to suit us). Both dark colouring so tend to wear lots of black or primary colours - Bride is talking about champagne or other pastels (which would wash us both out completely!!).
Bride is looking at nylon dresses, knee length, which have a skirt attached to 2 long "straps" that can be folded and tied in various ways to make different "tops" to the standard dress. None of which really facilitate major underwiring.
Wedding is in Rome in early September, so we are expecting heat of roughly 30 degrees.
Bride is also anxious to get dresses that we will "be able to use again afterwards". (While doing it on a shoestring - but still having 100 on the guestlist to travel - and expecting that everyone WILL travel!).
(To further complicate matters, BM1 and BM2 know each other vaguely, have met in the past but don't know each other well and will only meet and exchange contact details at the trying-on of these dresses Bride has identified. And Bride is not anxious to exchange details before that event....)
In terms of trying to identify possible options to steer Bride towards, can anyone help?
I think her idea of knee length is a good one.
I frankly don't care if I can't wear it again, and I doubt if BM 2 does either.
Nylon makes me sweat buckets.
I need decent underwear.
There is so much weirdness around this wedding already, but I have to and want to go, am honoured to have been asked to be BM, and all that. I don't want a row, but I need to make sure that there is something wearable.
I also don't want to have a row about other problems - but there is such a lack of thought around it all. And no information to people either - like an expectation that we could take DD out of school for 2-3 days. Then no children at wedding, that elderly MIL would come to our house and mind DD for 4 days while we go off for minimum time there, bring her to school and generally look after her. MIL has come overnight in the past, with FIL - but as a responsible adult while our then au pair organized the household (MIL cannot work our cooker or microwave, for example). Then back to us to bring DD but not having DCs generally.
She just seems to be "rabbit in the headlights" about it all.
So how can I gently point to some more practical solutions for her dress-wise. And also any guidance on how to steer her gently to thinking of the realities for others would be great too (I know that's not exactly a S&B question).
Sorry it's so long - I am genuinely NOT trying to cause a row.