tweenie formal wear that's not a dress

[siiiiiiiiigh]

Got a wedding in mid-Jan.

Got a nearly-11 year old tomboy to take to it, so have spent weeks trying to find an alternative to a frou-frou-frock - tunic/leggings, trouser suit, peplum top and trousers/leggings and found zero that hasn't made her screw her face up.

Have even tried to find fabric and attempt to make something acceptable - preferably in "not swishy material, but, maybe white with small, colourful beetles on it".

Anyone got any leads on what-to-put-your-quirky-tweenie in? Not pink or fluffy. Or too bright. Or too boring. Or with a scratchy seam.

Alternatively - anyone got tales of what happened when you forced a tweenie to wear a smart skater style dress with three quarter sleeves and a simple black/white rose pattern on it? Did she ruin the wedding with her tears and wailing?

Am trying to be encouraging, she's just not a girly girl. Am torn between wanting her to be comfortable and wanting her to just bloody well wear the not-perfect-frock.

I bought my dd some really nice dark turquoise velvet shorts which she wears with navy tights and a navy top with a bit of sparkle. Looks lovely but not girly.

This kind of thing?

m.boden.co.uk/en-GB/Girls-9-16yrs-Shorts.html

Casual shirt, blazer, shorts ( and tights if cold)

jumpsuit?

harem pants with blouse

Skinny jeans, smart shirt/blouse. Coloured/ patterned waistcoat or plain smart jacket. Brouges.

What about something like this jumpsuit?

Maybe with some sparkly trim high tops...?

more jumpsuits & playsuits

and here

Go on the next sale and type in ponte. Two pinafore dresses come up with shirts. One has bugs on the shirt. She may hate it but worth a punt.

Another suggesting shorts and tights.

Playsuit
jumpsuit??

Shorts and tights - cord or velvet?

My 7 year old went through a no dress phase. She wore a Chinese style tunic (mandarin collar) over leggings with ballet pumps. She looked amazing (not biased at all) and perfectly weddingy enough.

I was that child and was at a wedding at about 10, I was forced into a horrible outfit with trousers for the ceremony and meal but could wear whatever I wanted for the reception. This was suppose to appease me, I am however scowling in all the wedding photos.
I do wear lots of dresses now, but it took a long time to find things that suited me in my head and in real life.
The harem pants and a nice top would appeal to me now, but don't know how I would have felt about it at 10. Thou they would be very comfy, I wouldn't have been into tights at all so the shorts an tights combo wouldn't have worked.
I probably might have accepted boots, leggings, dress shrug thing, which is technically what I'm wearing now.

Or, look here, at zara : loads of really nice stretchy trousers, patterned and plain.

Thanks, folks.

She has shrugged at harem pants. "that might be ok"

Am shoving her onto a bus right now - going to try some on.

You're right, yellow - I want her to be pleasant at the wedding. She's a good kid, she'd wear what she hates to appease me, and stick a smile on her face for moments at a time, but, she'd not enjoy herself one bit and that'd show.

Boys are easier - kilts, no negotiation. Phew.

My DD (11) wore a black & cream rise whirled skater dress to a funeral & a couple of other occasions where smarter required & she was fine. She is also off pink, bright etc. She wore dress with black 60 denier tights & lace up school shoes with a little bolero cardigan.

I think it's important for kids to realised that it's not all about them & work on a compromise outfit. (If I'd had my way she'd have been in pale blue & colourful tights ! )

I bought a lovely tweed shorts and jacket from monsoon for my daughter. She wears it with a plain t shirt, thick tights and baseball style converse. Something like that might work for your daughter ?

Hope it goes well, I can remember standing in shops at that age, not having a clue what to wear and just feeling incredibly uncomfortable.
It's a rubbish age for clothes, especially if you don't really care but feel you should.

The hareem pants from H&M with the little heart print blouse is gorgeous. Tomboyish clothes are often v. informal and I think that little duet is great for a wedding and not at all girly. Did you have any luck at the shops?

Harem pants are a big hit - so, thanks. We've got some plain black ones and also some floral ones - jersey, so, not formal, but, good enough. Phew.

However...dum dum duuuuum she likes this:

very girly frock

Doesn't love it, but, it got a shrug and "well, I do like beetles".

So, I've ordered it. She's said if she can wear it with white tights, her black wool biker jacket and high top trainers then it's a deal.

Crikey. Fingers crossed she'll try it on when it arrives. To be fair, she really does like bugs. I'd be happy with a frock festooned in cockroaches, so, I feel like I've lucked out!

I'm excited, it's a size too big, but, if she's happy in it it'll do the formal dance the P7s are subjected to in the summer term - been dreading that!

This lady here can make you a skater dress to your specifications, bugs and all: kitschycoo.bigcartel.com

What a great thread. I have a very similar 11yo who has to be surgically separated from her beloved hoody and leggings combo whenever we have a formal occasion. I'm taking notes...

So pleased for both of you

Is there a reason she won't wear proper shoes ? Not sure high top trainers are appropriate for any formal occasion especially a wedding.

My daughter wore black opaque tights & her (polished) school shoes, which worked well enough.