Black tie - nothing in wardrobe

[MrsCosmopilite]

Help...

I'm 5' tall, short of leg, small of bust and flabby of belly.
I've been invited to a posh birthday bash in November and the dress code is black tie.

I have nothing in my wardrobe and I'm an impoverished student. I can't sew and none of my friends wear the same size clothes as me.

Is there anywhere on the High Street (think Primark, New Look) that will sell something that'll make me look half decent.

In case it helps I have crimson hair at the moment, I'm over 40, and I'm generally not good at wearing very high heels. I do have some comfy wedges in beige, black and green.

Style me! :)

Do you mind going second hand? You can get some great stuff pretty cheap.. For example try Oxfam online designer ? here?

Or do you have a local dress agency you can rent a posh frock for the evening from ?

No local dress agency but I have no issues with going second hand. Shall check out Oxfam. Thanks!

What sort of style are you after ideally?

TK Maxx might have options, especially if you can get to a shop in person, and can save some budget to get the length taken up?

Not exciting, but flattering to less than flat tummies?

I have no idea of what style I want. I normally wear tie dye skirts, or torn jeans with Emily strange T-shirts. I don't do 'formal' wear.

I do have a slightly battered turquoise evening dress which is empire line, BUT it has been taken to a festival and worn in the mud.

I know black tie is a long dress but not sure whether it should be arms covered, prom dress, straight dress...

Arms covered = up to you

Floor length, so not prom dress (which is normally shorter and slightly flared)

But only if it's a properly formal black tie, otherwise it might just mean "smart, evening frock"?

It's a friend of DH's and the invite says 'Black tie'. At least he has a suit in the wardrobe.

Not sure about arms, may go for a little cardi.

Thanks for all the suggestions upthread, but please keep them coming. I'm logging off for the evening now, but will be back to do some more 'research' tomorrow and shall do a bit of charity shop browsing at the weekend.

Yeah balls at uni were often black tie but lots of girls wore cocktail dresses. Do you know anyone else who is going to check how they are interpreting the invite?

Miss selfridge do petite sizing. How about this with hold in underwear.

Ok what colours do you like ? What size are you ? Do you fancy long or short ? Quirky? Any idea of make of clothes you like? Try ebay ? (I got my (non wedding) wedding dress on ebay (Monsoon indigo silk with bronze beading, it was lovely and new but half the price i would have paid otherwise. I also bought a great 2nd hand Jaeger boutique dress earlier this year on ebay . )

I recently bought this dress for a wedding. Its really flattering on, a bit different and covers a tum wonderfully

Cocktail is perfectly acceptable for black tie now. It did always used to full length I've been to loads and I'd say about 70% of women wear cocktail length.

You can wear a little black dress or a cocktail dress for black tie - you don't need a full length dress.

When I've been to black tie events, the vast majority of women have been in a LBD or cocktail dress.

I really like this pink dress which I would wear with your black wedges.

Could you get the turquoise evening dress cleaned and wear that? Slightly battered vintage evening dress sounds a little more your style than something shiny flashy and new?

I may be well off the mark but the question "what would Helena Bonham-Carter wear?" is forming in my head.

yy to "what would Helena Bonham-Carter wear?" have had a quick look on ebay but don't know your size. Some interesting velvet cocktail dresses to be had for small money.

How about something like this: www.houseoffraser.co.uk/Biba+Sleeveless+chiffon+overlay+dress+with+emb/194244728,default,pd.html

I don't know if this is too short: www.houseoffraser.co.uk/Mela+Loves+London+Sleeveless+collar+lace+dress/192281821,default,pd.html
You could wear one of those bib necklaces or one of those Oscar de la Renta style necklaces with it, have the collar over the necklace.

www.houseoffraser.co.uk/Episode+Cowl+front+zip+side+dress/192805269,default,pd.html

I like the print and pockets on this one: www.houseoffraser.co.uk/Uttam+Boutique+Mirror+willow+print+dress/196033791,default,pd.html

www.houseoffraser.co.uk/Wallis+Black+embellished+2in1+dress/200105593,default,pd.html

And a gold sequin dress (also available in navy): www.houseoffraser.co.uk/Untold+Sequin+shift+dress/176223596,default,pd.html

Shall check all the new links once I've got the little 'un to bed.

Yes, quirky is more me - not quite HBC but along those lines :)

I'm a size 12 (ish). Depending on where I shop.

At the moment I'm really liking the pink one, Lucked

I think I'll do a 'try on' in shop of that, see how it looks and consider if I can get more mileage on it.

In the interim, I'll check out the local charity shops tomorrow (we get a lot of monsoon, phase eight, etc) and see if my evening dress would fit. It's strapless (but has straps that can go on). I'm a bit flabby around the armpits so a shrug may be essential.

If I get something else to wear then it needs to be formal enough to also serve as a graduation dress next year.

Again, thanks for all the help and suggestions.

FWIW I'm not good with cowl/slash necks (I have a scar on my throat which can be a bit attention grabbing), and don't have the cleavage for anything plunge.

How do you feel about leopard print?

print long dress with sleeves

tethers I like the leopard print but sadly it's out of my budget.

Plan for today:
Scour charity shops
Locate existing dress and try on
Stop eating crap food so I can fit a size 12 properly

There's this leopard one which is a bit cheaper.

I normally wear tie dye skirts, or torn jeans with Emily strange T-shirts. I don't do 'formal' wear

In which case, a plain or silky T-shirt top with a long or three-quarter length skirt-slinky or prom style- would be a good option. Silk scarf as a sash if you want to be fancy, otherwise keep is very simple and wear bold lipstick. Borrow a nice clutch bag to fancy it up a bit.

I like this Dorothy Perkins skirt, and this one.

Abbie like those a lot.

Charity shops turned up nowt today. May have to take a day off to shop around.
Fuchsia seems to be popular at the moment! Annoyingly I did have a fuchsia coloured prom dress a few years back which I wore only once to a hen party. However, it was not long after I'd had DD and I had boobs at the time so had to buy a bigger size than my usual. Six months on from wearing it, it was hanging off my chest.