Fed up of being poor

[ejayne]

Anyone else finding it tough at the moment?

My ex is refusing to help with any childcare.

Doing a normal office job plus working in an off licesne in the evenings.

Living in a v grotty flat with little furniture.

In addition I don't go out as I haven't got the money.

Also, really embarrassed wearing the same suit to work every day as it is the only decent one I've got. Plus, only got one pair of work shoes which a tight and really hurt my toes.

Sorry to moan - just wondering if anyone else is in a similar position?

Yes. My youngest has health problems and I'm not going back to work till next year at least. My solution is charity shop shopping and "borrowing" my sisters clothes. It's not the same I miss disposable income.

This was me 2006-2012 ish. It was really tough. I 'dealt' with it by becoming obsessed with health, exercise & fitness. I hadn't a bean but I looked good in an old bikini and old jeans. Whenever I was invited anywhere I was wearing the same ropey ol' threads but at least I knew I looked slim and healthy, and that might sound smug but it helped me, mentally . As it happens, now that my financial circumstances have improved a bit, I spend more on clothes but I'm not in the good shape I was when I was totally broke!

I felt like I just had to wait for my children to grow up a bit before things got better. Do you have a local buy sell swap site that you could join on fb? I have picked up some great bargains on my local buy sell swap site.

What do you need? Think about what you really need. Categorise it. What's at the top. ASK for it. For Christmas? For your birthday? or be cheeky and put up a status on Facebook "wood love book shelves if anybody is having a clear out soon".

Sorry, my post might have given you the impression that I felt bad for six long years. It wasn't that bad. The exhaustion from belt-tightening used to hit me in waves, overwhelm me occasionally. Sometimes I felt quite virtuous. It trained my consumer habits very well. I would never buy two of something nwo, like I would have done once. I used to find a pair of jeans that fitted well and sort of 'panic buy' a second pair.

Make lists of what you need most and why you need it or think you need it. It helps clarify.

I know how you're feeling. I'm absolutely broke at the minute due to family stuff. I shop a lot in charity shops and have got some great stuff for very little. One of our charity shops puts things on a pound rail after they've been in the shop for a while and not sold. I've snagged some really great stuff from the pound rail and go in once a week to check out the new stuff they've put on it.

I'd advise not going mad in charity shops to be honest. Except for books and furniture. Scooping some thing off the pound rail in a charity shop isn't going to make you feel pampered.

Look at what you've got already in your wardrobe. Can anything be altered, repaired, dry-cleaned, shortened?

Invest in yourself. A nail varnish. A spf. Cod liver oil capsules! Do a work-out!

There is a charity called Dress 4 Success that helps women with work appropriate clothes, might be worth a google?

OP, I've been there too for a couple of years2011/12. I too got some satisfaction from finding bargins and economising but sometimes it all gets a bit too much doesnt it, and I agree it does come in waves. That is rotten re work clothes, and I'm not too sure what to suggest.

My situation has now changed much for the better and I am moving house. I dont suppose there is much chance you are near me but I am downsizing and have furniture I am giving away. King size bed, sideboard, and 3 sofas available. South central area!

plus, ebay things you don't want or need anymore and then treat yourself with the money you earned. are there any shops near you that buy second hand books? there's a shop near me that buys second hand books for 50c, they also sell them.

sometimes you just want to stroll through havey niks and buy channelnumber 19 though I totally get it.

I really understand how you feel. Having always had a high disposable income I am now struggling on a part time salary and high childcare costs.
I have to avoid doing everything i used too and find it hard to say that I cant afford it.
I know how you feel

I get you. The minute you have a little spare, something pops up and eats it. It gets draining after a while. I currently have a shelf holding my sofa up

Do you get maintenance? That will help.

Charity shops in naice areas get some amazing stuff in. I bought a Mulberry bag in one for a tenner and a gorgeous Dior top for three quid! Loads more bargains over the years.

eBay is great for bargains too, but only bid on stuff with clear photos. I can offer this advice from bitter personal experience

See if there are any hairdressers/colleges near you who need hairdressing models. You can get a fab haircut for free or just a few pounds. Or you could do the MN haircut - I've been doing it for years, even before it was called the MN haircut! I often get compliments on my hair and love telling people that I haven't been to a hairdresser in 11 years

Pound shops are AMAZING for makeup. Can be a bit hitty missy but today my local one had Revlon and Sally Hansen nail polishes in - the exact same ones were best part of a tenner in Boots just over the road.

Also have a look on Freecycle for furniture, or maybe there's a local charity which sells used furniture? There's one near us and we got a lovely bookshelf for DD's room a few weeks ago for a fiver.

Not here, you can't. It's good if you want a fake Cartier watch and a load of well loved Tesco stuff though I've resorted to keeping my clothes and only buying a few things in the sales. I've amassed a wardrobe full but some is now 'vintage' as I never throw anything out.

What size are you for work wear? Had health problems and got spare work clothes of most sizes in my wardrobe I don't need. Do you like corporate dresses? Suits? Shirts and what size. If some are good I will post to you.