Help please

[RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie]

I have realised that, despite loving clothes and despite living on S&B, I actually look horrible most of the time. I'm only short and have big norks, so even though I'm size 10-12, I tend to look like a Weeble. When I see photographs of me I just see boobs and belly. I pretty much live in black tops with respectable necklines, as I hate showing my chest off at all.

SO - I guess what I'm asking is what should I be wearing to try to minimise my top half without just looking like a frump?

Thank you to anybody who made it to the question and has some ideas!

Those silk camis are beautiful.

Seem a decent price too. I will investigate!

Really lovely!

What I'd really like is a thick cotton top with elbow length sleeves and a sweetheart or slashed neck - sort of 50s-ish.

I think if you want to minimise boobs then v neck is the way to go .. deep sweatheart would work too.. I got some tops like that in H&M a couple years ago and find I can't wear them very well as not top-heavy - not sure if they still sell them
I also think dresses would make you 'streamlined' as much as possible - I like ponte jersey dresses totally flattering
or maybe if slim legs then wear slim cut ankle length chinos/similar with top.. minimise volume at waist level
but you sound lovely! so think nobody else would notice such things

This jaegar top is beautiful but silly money:
jaegar

mango t shirt

cos silk

This top is flattering for boobs. I wish it didn't have a pocket though. Boden

Black is obviously your "signature style", Remus, but other people won't notice the slight difference between, for example, a black cotton tee and a black silk top.

How about getting some new bras, and then introducing a little bit of colour? Or monochrome contrast, such as this Kaliko jacket ?

Could you see yourself in this floral jacket, Remus?

I know you're asking about tops but, rather than just trying to play down your boobs, what about drawing the eye down to your arse and great legs?

If you're hourglassy or close, there are some lovely pencil skirts around at the moment in striking patterns and colours e.g. this Jigsaw one (although eek at the cost!)
www.jigsaw-online.com/products/tulip-print-skirt-8201

Oasis also have some nice dark floral ones for around £40 (sorry their link isn't working).

Or slim, patterned trousers? Sadly I haven't got the thighs to carry these off but it sounds like you do! www.hm.com/gb/product/25786?article=25786-A

I second the Oasis printed skirts. Terrific value for money. I just bought the rose print pencil skirt (and the matching top [deep, brave breaths]) and I have the short winter rose skirt they did in winter. Both have amazing prints.

Thanks, everybody. I live in skirts - have zillions of printed and plain, both pencil and full. I do like the idea of patterned skinny trousers though and really like the look of those H&M ones. I think they might actually quite suit me too.

I bought this today, for work. This thread encouraged me to try a 'lower' cut top, and it's really nice. I needed to buy a size 8 though, which is bonkers. There was a shedload of spare fabric in the back of the 10 - will need tummy holding knickers though!

I do sometimes wear colour - honestly! In fact, I've just spent two hours sorting out all of my clothes and there were, oh, at least six things that were not black or grey!

I really like that Kaliko jacket btw. Unfortunately their stuff usually drowns me, even in an 8.

I'm a similar size - 5'5 32E size 8. I know exactly what you mean about feeling top heavy I feel exactly the same. From the side I look like I might tip over...

I wear a lot of dresses - particularly wrap dresses, and a lot of cardis - I like slim fit with a round neck so I don't feel too exposed. I find fitted tops make me self conscious about my boobs and many tops are cut a bit low so I am majorly into blouses particularly DvF, which if you're on a budget you can pick up easily on ebay if you know your size. They tend to be nicely fitted, minimise boobage and work well with both skirts and trousers.

Thanks, Twinkle. I don't generally do terribly well with dresses tbh - because I'm short-waisted and short too, the waist in the dress isn't generally where my waist is. I suppose it's a matter of trying lots on - that one I bought today turned out to be a revelation, yet I've tried similar on before and they've been disastrous. I usually get on better with what are called tunics (slim, fitted, maybe even slightly body-con), but which on me often work as a dress!

And yes to looking like we might tip over. When I was breast-feeding a slight breeze combined with giant breast feeding boobs could have knocked me down!

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie I know you're not keen on the idea of the Boden Ravello top, but I'm a curvy 10/12 hourglass with a substantial dress and I own three (silver, grey and red) and they are very, very flattering.

Thanks, Sorrel. The garish prints scared me off. Will look again.

Oh no, I steer clear of the prints! The silver is my most recent purchase and it's very nice indeed. I'm planning to wear it to a wedding evening reception next month with navy Boden Chelsea trousers, (I don't buy everything from Boden honest!), very high heels and a silver clutch.

Yes to just the plain colours - I have grey, navy, black and ivory. I love them, very flattering.

remus your style always sounds fab and you have a v definite signature style so I'm sorry you're feeling down. I'm a 30f so I don't see a 32e as particularly busty but I think I'm fairly long waisted so it probably makes a difference. I assume you have a bra that lifts your boobs up so that they don't sit on your waist iyswim.

Remus, I simply refuse to believe that you look as bad as you think you do. I suspect that you are being hyper-critical

So, I'm going off-task and just linking to things I've seen which I think you might like:

Tunic would look good with cigarette pants.

Sorrel - outfit sounds brilliant.

Bill - I'll have another look. What size do you think?

Queen - thank you, though I honestly think that I must be a better describer than I am actual dresser. I have a couple of decent bras, but could probably do with being fitted again. I usually wear Fantasie ones.

Thank you, Tethers. I have a tendency to be very self-critical, I admit, but everybody else on here always looks brilliant - thinking of the blog ladies especially - and I look like my nana!

dress

another dress

If it's any consolation, I look like I've been dragged through a hedge backwards most days.