don't want to go on holiday . Need a kick

[JustLikeHeaven]

I know I should be grateful but I would do anything to get out of going on holiday with husband and kids this day next week. We are going to Greece. I just feel so ashamed of my body. I don't want to go swimming or even put on a swim suit.

I am 5'6 and 11 very un toned stone. I am usually 10 stone but have been comforting eating since Christmas. . Before really good suppose.

Is there anything I can do apart from spray tan, nails. . .That will make me feel better about myself. I know it's not a huge amount of weight but it might as well be 3 stone for the effects its having on my self esteem. I am stuck in a self sabotaging self pitying cycle that I can't seem to break

Any suggestions, including cop on, greatly appreciated

Just make sure no-one takes any photos - that really takes a shiner off my holiday.
I'm about the same height and weight as you - I don't think I'm that bad, but I probably need to lose a few pounds to wear a bikini. I bought this recently and I think it's quite flattering if you have good legs www.theschoolrun2014.com/the-scotmid-school-run.

Don't know if you have Next but they have some nice shorts and full length linen trousers.

Ladyedith has it Op.
When I was 16, firm and curvy 36 (prob not, but M&S sizing), 24, 36 , with no cellulite and breasts up round my ears, I wanted to be the sylph Kate Moss alikes. I was an old school size 10 and would bloody lose a kidney to look like that now. I wasted holidays in bikinis with huge man Tshirts over the top
I have always felt like that, at every size from 10 to 16.
You will look lovely, if you feel confident and don't try and hide yourself away, I honestly believe it makes you look bigger. Think of big, bouncy 50yrs old + women on the Med, there are always a few on the beach, walking round in bikinis bold as brass. They don't give a shit, and why should they?
In a week you could lose a few pounds, tone up a bit with exercise, but you need to just get there and enjoy yourself yourself!

I guarantee that on your holiday there will be hundreds of women who would kill for your body.

I think black swimsuits on really pale skin look fantastic. pale skin can look beautiful just be sure to slap on the high factor

Those Next chino shorts are ace, v flattering. Also another vote for a heavy duty bra sized bikini. Asos have some Cleo by Panache ones, go down a back size and up a cup size. You'll be fine when you get there, as someone else said there will be dozens in much worse shape than you!

Whoopsie, I kind of linked to the wrong thing, this is the cover up I meant www.johnlewis.com/john-lewis-pompom-kaftan/p1219186?colour=Navy.

If it's any comfort I'm feeling similar about this holiday. We go away with 2 other families - my best friends from university. They are great and we have wonderful times together, except they are both short and slender and I am taller and bigger boned. Even when I am fairly toned I look like the jolly green giant beside them in photos. I'm feeling that I need to lose some eight before we go away in July, but keep self sabotaging by eating mini eggs and other rubbish food. I need to focus on the positive and try posing nicely for pictures.

Thank you all for the encouragement

I tried on swimwear this morning and realised my shape is actually okay. . Just too much of me. I can work on that. And I have some veins. . .Not bulging but blue and unsightly on my thighs. Might look into getting them sorted before the summer

Thankparty again. . And rookie. . Your first link made me smile. Xx

See!!
Have a wonderful time

Oh and whereabouts in Greece are you going? We are going in August.

Smile a lot, laugh and have fun with your lovely family. A happy wife and mum is what is needed, not a fashion plate. Life is really too short and holidays are precious memories. Worth more than anything. Everyone puts on a bit of weight during winter months so when the holiday is over you could always try a little streamlining! Have a lovely time.

I would try some sort of tan before you go. It really will make a difference.

It is quite likely not to be that warm there yet tbh.

Hey OP, I'm in Ireland too and I have a holiday coming up next month.

It isn't really about how much you weigh. I weigh not much at all but I'm still fretful and ultra-sensitive about my body when I'm on a hot-weather holiday. It's the pale, freckly thing in my case, and I'm sure the vast majority of women who've had a baby or two never feel the same about their stomach afterwards. Remember that we're fed images of bronzed celeb bikini bodies almost daily and try to keep that in mind.

On a practical level, here's what helps me: rigorous planning and knowing a few wardrobe tricks.

• Being ruthless in my edit of my holiday wardrobe and bringing just a few bits that I really feel great in. (If you're an apple shape you probably have good legs, so a floaty kaftan is definitely a plan then you can prance about with the best of them.)

• Wearing a nice bikini top and a sarong tied above my navel (I'll be about 17 weeks preg so will have that silly inbetweeny bump going on ).

• Going for a classic holiday look (e.g. a Breton-stripe dress of some kind and really nice sunglasses -- aviator or Wayfarer style) as opposed to a garish neon sparkly look.

• A light tan. I just feel better with one and I also look healthier. I'll either use gradual self-tanner or try to find a spray tan suitable for pale skin.

Let's both have a ball, remember our DDs will be watching us and yes, cop on to ourselves :)

I weigh the same and same height. Was 10 stone at Christmas. I hate myself. New start tomorrow!

Get a spray tan. Get a nice dress you feel comfortable in. A sarong is your friend!

Enjoy your holiday. X

My theory is that us Irish women don't like swimwear because we are not used to wearing it too often with our weather

I am exactly the same as the OP. Just think that no-one on holiday will know you or care what you look like. Only your family will care, and they will want you to be a fun mum, not a fashion model. After a week relaxing in the sun you will feel better about yourself and can come home and feel more motivated to loose the weight for summer here.

no need for angst. be aware that no-one is really looking, I'm afraid that you are just another person and not that fascinating.

wear bikini top and boardshorts, put a rash vest on in the water and splash around for hours. Like your kids will.

your body is healthy ( I hope) and everything works (I hope). You should be grateful, not ashamed.

enjoy the trip.

I think, and hope that when you get there most people think the same thing....nobody cares.And most are therefore more relaxed and non-judgmental than you would imagine, and so you also stop giving yourself a hard time.I bought the Panache Cleo swimdress (which was great) but also bikinis.

I think, and hope that when you get there most people think the same thing....nobody cares.And most are therefore more relaxed and non-judgmental than you would imagine, and so you also stop giving yourself a hard time.I bought the Panache Cleo swimdress (which was great) but also bikinis.