Please help me care for my hair...advice needed, thanks

[Selks]

Hi wise ones, I'm after some advice on hair care - what products to use and how to wash / style on a daily basis.

My hair is shoulder length layered wavy bob, fine hair but reasonable amount of it, quite unpredictable in its behaviour - some days it has great volume and waves beautifully, other days looks flat and dull, other days frizzy and 'pouffy'.

Currently I am washing it each morning in the shower with Aussie miracle moist shampoo. What I put on next varies - sometimes the miracle moist conditioner on the ends, sometimes just Aussie spray in conditioner to the ends or sometimes just mousse. I have some texturising 'putty' and some TwistedSista leave in conditioner for curly hair (which is great) that I sometimes scrunch into the ends.

I don't blow dry (don't have time before work and I am crap at it) - I leave to dry naturally in the car on the way to work then just gently brush when I get there - usually just the top layers being careful to barely brush to avoid frizz.

The aim is a messy wavy look. I'll try and post a photo. I do achieve that sometimes but I would like to avoid the dull flatness or pouffy frizz that I sometimes end up with.

Also how can I tell which of my products contains silicone or other nasties that I should be avoiding - what should I specifically be looking out for on the package?

And what's this gel that people keep talking about that's good? The only hair gel I know is the stuff of wet look crispy perms!

Sorry for the long post! Any advice gratefully received.

This is what I'd like it to look like ideally (although I'm more a hazel shade) and I know you can only get waves like this with styling / tongs so mine wouldn't look quite like that, but my hair has about the same natural amount of wave in it (on a good day) -

This pic is not me but this woman has the same texture hair as me on a bad frizzy, puffy day -

what about a serum or argan oil scrunch into hair when you have towel dried it and just keep scrunching every so often until its dry. Boots do a curl cream too which is meant to be great, someone posted about scrunching her hair with this and putting it in a microfibre turban towel thing until she had done her face and had breakfast. supposedly worked wonders on making her hair all wavy.

I read something on here a couple of weeks ago about leaving hair absolutely soaking wet. I thought I would try it, as it may be the reason my hair curls beautifully after swimming in the sea. Anyway it really has made a difference. I wash and condition,rinse, then squeeze the ends to get some of the wáter out, then put a little oil into the ends and leave it dripping. My curls are shiny and defined.

your 'bad frizzy day' is me on a smooth day!! (had major straightening done).

doesn't look bad or frizzy to me.

one idea is to wash it less often - if you haven't been exercising/swimming/getting mucky, turn down the washing to two-three times a week. Never brush and limit the blow dryer.

most products do nothing, but I have to say that Moroccan oil does seem to make a small difference.

Thanks. I do try to wash it every other day sometimes but it just feels itchy and looks rank. So usually I wash everyday, but I do one shampoo rather than two which is less drying. In fact I don't use much shampoo each time at all.

Fraggle, I do leave my hair wet each day, I rarely use a hairdryer.

The microfibre cloth sounds possible. I know people do a twisting thing with it for waves - plopping? - but I'm not sure that would work with medium length hair.

I have some hair serum that I use occasionally on the ends. It's ok - I've found other things work better. It's not bad for particularly frizzy areas though (for some reason my left side is more frizzy than my right)

Thanks for all the suggestions

Special, the 'bad frizzy' thing isn't meant as a criticism - that woman's hair looks perfectly fine its just I want mine to be different - more defined waves.

But do you towel dry it? That is the key, do not touch hair with a towel.

Ah I see what you mean. I do use a towel but blot it and don't rub. You'd have to get SOME of the water up wouldn't you? I can't cope with dripping everywhere! Or would it be better to use a microfibre thingy and just wrap my hair in it?

anyone else?