How do I get some "Pep"?

[Alchemist]

I would be grateful for any advice and thoughts on how I can regain a bit of pep and joy back into my life.

H left in November and, although things were bad, it still knocked me for six. The DCs 9&7 are having different reactions but it has been very emotional. This has been stressful and over Christmas I was laid low with several infections so have been very poorly.

Today is the first day in 4 I have felt well enough to shower . I showered, moisturised, put make up on and did hair. Dressed in black skinnies, black jumper, black boots and leopard print scarf. I feel much better but, oh man, do I look grey. I mean just drab, grey and nothingy. My skin is dull and just lifeless looking. And that's when I've got the make up and hair done!

The "best" part of the split is that I have lost weight and am now a comfortable 14 (am 5'8"). This has revamped my wardrobe as I can wear clothes I haven't been able to fit into. I intend to start doing The Shred and try to keep up this weight (don't have scales so don't know what I weigh). I feel better in myself for this and am really happy to have so many different clothes to wear! I was given some vouchers and bought some boots and the loveliest red suede bag. I keep gazing at it .

So would yoga/vitamins/something else help me get a bit of oomph back? And stop looking so grey? Thank you for reading.

Am going to give myself a manicure this afternoon in front of the tv. H has DCs until tomorrow so will just slob about today I think. Still a bit wobbly from infections.

get some new makeup
get a really nice haircut
give yourself regular manicures/pedicures (or go get them done in a salon once in a while, if you can afford the splurge)
exfoliate your face regularly and drink lots of water
cut back on alcohol and smoking (if applicable)
reduce caffeine intake to 'reasonable' levels
do some regular exercise (yoga/pilates, swim, zumba, etc - whatever appeals, is easy/fun)

A little clarins fake tan on the face does wonders for me after an illness.

You sound like you are in a fairly positive frame of mind. I hope 2014 is a new beginning and a great year for you.

Try to get out in the fresh air as much as you can. It really helps your mood, and makes you look healthier too.

Really sorry that you've had a difficult time. You just need to do little things to help yourself feel better. Baby steps. How about asking for a makeover at the Bobbi Brown counter? Seeing a personal shopper at House of Fraser, or similar?

I am probably showing myself up as shallow, but having a lovely new piece of clothing or a new lippy really lifts my mood if I'm feeling a bit blah.

Good luck.

I realised during my maternity leave that I just wore black all the time. I went to JL for the free personal shopping consultation and asked her to find me some colourful clothes, it transformed my wardrobe and six months on I'm still delighted with my new look. I've lost 1.5 stone since (5:2) and I'm sure it's partly because I am happier in my appearance and therefore happy to work at it! Why not try that? Debenhams and HOF do it as well.

Manicures always help me me pep up.
Also a collection of scarves for a splash of colour.

Thank you for your replies and suggestions.

Money is very tight so things I do will have to be home based. I have recently found a hairdresser, who conveniently lives on my road, who gets my hair (wavy/curly/frizzy) and cuts it really nicely. I might have to save up to get her to dye it for me as, at 45, I don't think home dyes are quite working on my hair as htey used to. Mind you, am a bit slapdash so could try a bit more carefully . Does anyone know about the aspirin facepack thing? Although I do have supplies of moisturiser, hand creams, hair stuff etc to last a while.

Clothes-wise I am actually alright. Am a charity shop fiend and most of the stuff in my wardrobe now actually fits. I have been ruthless about clearing clothes out. I did a major clear, took it all to the charity shop and a few days later, did the same with what I had kept. Another couple of bags to the charity shop! It is quite a nice feeling to look at my stuff and think "I could wear this or that and it will fit properly". I think today was just a "black" day.

I'm sorry but if I scroll back I will somehow delete this message as laptop playing up but I agree that if you feel better about yourself (as in presenting yourself) you do actually feel better about yourself. This red suede bag is currently my favourite thing to look at. It is beautiful .

I thinking more long-term as in an exercise regime (The Shred for starters), a more healthy way of eating, am really only eating one meal a day atm, just don't have appetite but what I do eat is good stuff. Today was boiled duck eggs and asparagus. Work in a greengrocers so not as extravagant as it sounds! Perhaps vitamins or something like that. Am very run down and have the worst cold sores I've ever had.

Definitely don't think its shallow to care about how you look. I hope that doesn't sound too shallow .

Again, thank you for reading and your suggestions. I am very grateful.

Floradix is excellent if you need a bit of a lift.

Buy a new blusher - Max Factor creme blush is excellent and cheap, or Benetint if you fancy splurging.

The Superdrug Vitamin E hotcloth cleanser is nice, and you could maybe buy an exfoliating wash too - the Olay Regenerist one is nice.

Not shallow to care about how you look at all - nothing more depressing than looking in the mirror and seeing a washed out face. I agree with Remus re: make up. As money is tight, I would definitely check out Superdrug for skincare and make- up supplies. I'm sure you've heard of MUA make up? They do really decent products, many of which are £1 each. I've tried the eyeshadow (as good as MAC IMHO), the mascara (Fine) and lipgloss (not bad). A little make-up routine every day definitely won't hurt, especially in grey January.

Also, and I don't think you mention this but it was the first thing I thought of when I read 'pep'. Do you have friends around you? Can you do some new/interesting things with them? Not sure where u live and your interests, but I just feel a lot better/more interesting/interested if I DO things apart from everyday routine stuff. Maybe art museums/book group/running club etc? Just something other than work/kids/house, and plays you might meet done new friends along the way.

Good luck