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Original poster

DP will only wear T-shirts

23 replies

Frostybean · 12/12/2013 15:44

Which is fine but he is a middle aged man of hefty proportions so it looks a little strange, especially in the depths of winter. I'm trying to persuade him to wear casual shirts or even, a jumper or long sleeved T-shirt but he says they make him too hot.

Can anyone suggest any 'cool' shirts or jumpers? I've heard of 'wicking' wool but think it may be too scratchy.

We have a formal dinner coming up soon and he is planning to wear a short sleeved shirt

OP posts:

Twinklestein · 12/12/2013 16:23

Show him some pics of similarly large middle-aged men in t-shirts, he probably has no idea how bad he looks. I'm sure he doesn't care either.

Less persuasion and more 'I will not be seen out with you in that'.

ouryve · 12/12/2013 16:32

If he feels hot, he feels hot.

He should make more effort for a formal do, though.

GandalfsPointyHat · 12/12/2013 16:33

Gant?

BunnyLebowski · 12/12/2013 16:35

This makes me think of the dad from Friday Night Dinner .

shazbean · 12/12/2013 16:36

I've given up on mine.

Yes, it is not what the majority of people, me included, think of as suitable attire but he does at least wear a short sleeved shirt if formal is required.

He's an adult, he can wear what he likes. Id rather he was comfortable and enjoyed himself. I'd also be pretty annoyed if he tried to tell me what to wear.

Spectacularly unhelpful, sorry!

Ragwort · 12/12/2013 16:41

Tend to agree with shaz - I am sure my DH doesn't much like my choice of clothes but if he 'advised' me what to wear I would tell him to mind his own business .

dexter73 · 12/12/2013 16:57

'I will not be seen out with you in that'

If my dh ever said that to me I would make his wish come true!

mirpuppet · 12/12/2013 20:31

Suggest he roll up sleeves of dress shirt for more formal outings.

Fairylea · 12/12/2013 20:33

Ah ha yes the dad from Friday night dinner !:) :)

How about some long sleeve t shirts? Would that be any good? Something from lands end or cotton traders?

Fairylea · 12/12/2013 20:33

Oh gosh sorry just seen you've tried that!

nosoupforyou · 12/12/2013 20:36

Maybe just leave him to it - what's the worst that can happen if he rocks up in a short sleeve shirt?

FunnysInLaJardin · 12/12/2013 20:37

leave him to it. I have bought DH jumpers and long sleeve tops for 25 years thinking he would get cold and he lives in shorts and T shirts even mid winter. Provided he is smart for the dinner then he is fine

Original poster

Frostybean · 15/12/2013 00:11

Thanks for all suggestions. I'm glad it's not just me. His choice of attire for lounging around the house is T-shirt and shorts so I should be grateful he puts on a pair of trousers when he goes out.

I'd never dream of forcing him to wear something but I do look longingly at other men who dress stylishly in layers (with sleeves)!

A friend of his is a much admired 'best dressed man' type but DP says he looks like Man at C&A (those under 30 may have to Google that one).

He'd like me to wear Superdry but hell will freeze over before that happens.

OP posts:

IWillOnlyEatBeans · 15/12/2013 17:05

Long sleeve shirts with the sleeves rolled up can look smarter and more flattering that short sleeved shirts I think - because the sleeves don't stick out at a funny angle! If you buy shirts that need a cufflink then they are normally nice and wide to roll up...

specialsubject · 15/12/2013 17:27

where's the issue? As long as he is washed and interesting, who cares?

if you like the house much hotter than he does, this may be how he has to dress at home.

I also find most houses and venues way too hot.

lurkingaround · 15/12/2013 20:41

Yes he may be washed and interesting, but I think it's a little disrespectful to turn up, where everyone else has scrubbed up and made an effort, in basically pjs. Fine in the comfort of your own home.

I don't know how you can get around this one OP, but I totally understand where you're coming from. Some may think it high-handed, but I have said to DH that when he's king of the world he can wear what he like, until then, there are occasions that call for shirts.

Twinklestein · 15/12/2013 21:28

I agree it's disrespectful it's also off-putting - not a pretty sight!

He just needs a fresh clean white shirt. And to pull his finger out.

specialsubject · 15/12/2013 21:32

since when does a short-sleeved shirt equal pyjamas?

feelingvunerable · 15/12/2013 22:11

How do you dress op?
Do you usually wear a t shirt or do you wear dresses and blouses?

I'm with you on this. I don't find t shirts attractive, I much prefer a man in a shirt.

Original poster

Frostybean · 16/12/2013 09:23

I like a nice cool house (no fires until the evening, heating only on when the temperature outside gets to below 5. DP always has windows and doors open so the temperature indoors isn't the issue, he's always just very warm (although his skin feels cold). I dress smart/casual so jeans, boots, long sleeved tops etc. haven't got the figure for T-shirts unfortunately. If I'm going somewhere smart then I'll wear a dress or skirt. He says he'd like me to dress 'younger' like the girls at the pub. I'm 45 for fuck's sake so I'm not going to be wearing shorts/tights/ mini-dresses etc.. I agree that long sleeved shirts with sleeves rolled up are better than short sleeved shirts by a mile but he's anti-shirt, especially ones that only have one breast pocket and look too much like 'work shirts' as he calls them. I just think he's too old to be wearing the whole T-shirts/jeans/converse combo. It has the effect of making him look old and desperate to hang on to his youth.

OP posts:

Aquelven · 16/12/2013 10:49

Sorry, I'm going to be no help at all, but I'm just reading the thread in amazement as I have the exact opposite trouble.
It took me years to get mine out of ties, never mind suits with long sleeved shirts, at weekends or holidays. The best he'd do was to roll up his shirtsleeves.
He has now at least ditched the suits & ties mostly for casual wear, & instead knocks around in casual shirts(always long sleeves), fleeces & thick hiking type trousers, he could nip up Snowden at a minutes notice

Jeans are for gardening or DIY
He owns two short sleeved T shirts to add to pyjama bottoms on freezing nights

A trip into town....out come the suits

feelingvunerable · 16/12/2013 23:46

So he wants you to make an effort and dress "younger" but he thinks it fine to slob around in t shirts.
No, I think he should make more of an effort.
Definatley a long sleeved shirt for a formal do.

50ShadesOfMaybe · 17/12/2013 08:51

That was going to be my comment: he wants you to dress younger but won't make an effort for you. You should probably both agree not to to criticise what the other wears. (Or come to some compromise.)

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