What do you wear to a funeral where 'no mourning clothes' has been specified?

[DuckworthLewis]

I feel awful posting this here, but my neighbour has passed away after a long illness and her funeral is this week. I do understand that there are much more important things to be worrying about, but I've never been to a funeral, and really have no idea what 'no mourning clothes' means and I hope you can help me...

Does it really mean 'no black'? Should I wear something bright and colourful?

I'm a bit lost really as my wardrobe is well stocked with casual wear (jeans etc) and I have a couple of good quality black suits but very little in between. I'm loathe to buy something new for a funeral (seems wrong somehow). I do have a (candy) pink pencil skirt suit that might do, but it is quite summery. Given the request, would a black suit be really 'off'?

Help!

Perhaps a black suit with a bright blouse, scarf and/or handbag. I would take it as meaning no black, but I don't think the bereaved family would expect you to go and buy something new for the funeral.

Oooh, tricky, I'd be worrying too! But 'no mourning clothes' seems quite clear. What was your neighbour like? Do you get the impression that she was the kind of person who would have clearly said that she didn't want everyone in miserable, dull clothing?

If they wanted everyone to wear really bright clothing I would have expected something clearer - "X wanted everyone to wear their brightest clothes" etc.

If that wea me, I would wear a dress in green or brown or something that looked neat and respectful but not overly loud. Could you wear one of your suits, but wear a nice bright top so it's still smart, and then loose the jacket?

OP; I think it actually depends, on the family.

I´ve been to a huge funeral where people where requested to wear "happy" colours.

I went in black (not alone), Some men where there in Dublet (not alone), so people where in a brightly coloured clothes.

I would probably go with Black suit (skirt or trousers?? a bright ISH shirt and have my jacket in the car that way if I get there and feel out of place I can put my jacket on quickly.

Could you wear the bottom half of your black suit ie trousers or skirt with a brighter top half? What type of coat do you have as TBH that is what people will see the most? Mourning clothes usually does mean black and formal so I guess what they don't want is people dressed in a black dress with black coat etc or men wearing black ties.

This summer I went to a funeral - 'no black' was the request. I wore a smart summer shift dress and took a cardigan. I felt really un-dressed for a funeral! However once I got there it was fine and other people were in similar things (was a hot day to be fair). Another friend wore a black summer dress with a pink scarf - as she didn't have anything else to wear that was the right length etc. I don't think you need to buy anything new, agree that a bright blouse/scarf etc would be fine with a black suit.

A lot of people now prefer a celebration of somebody's life rather than focusing on their death only. I suppose steer away from formal black suits and go more casual/colourful. Or perhaps just go with black skirt/trousers from suit and not jacket with a more colourful top/accessories. Nobody will mind and you usually find some of the older people still wear traditional black.

I would wear what you would usually put on to a smart ocassion with your friends/family.

It does mean no black. Given that it'll be your top half mainly on show, you could get away with black skirt/trousers and a bright top.

I wore a navy and white Phase eight dress to a funeral recently.

Don't wear black if 'no mourning clothes' has been stated. I'd wear a smart dress of some description with heels or boots (depends on weather), and either a nice jacket or smart cardi. I never wear black to funerals anyway - just something in a sober colour, but often with a pattern or a colourful scarf.

P.S. How about having a look in some local charity shops to see if you can find something suitable and inexpensive?

A nice dress with a print would be suitable. I would think no black, nothing too formal. But also not jeans and trainers.

yes, a black suit would very definitely be off and disrespectful to the family.
everyday or smarter clothes fine, jeans ok if you really have to

Jeans are not OK for a funeral, don't wear jeans. You would be better to wear your black trousers than jeans.

take your cue from the family and from nobody else. they wont mind bring asked. jeans will be fine for some and a no no for others. ditto black clothes.