Clothes for old village dwellers

[HenWithAttitude]

I'm 50ish... Live rurally and my 'local' clothes shop are an out of town M&S, Next and supermarkets.

I do have a Debenhams in reasonable driving distance. The nearest city has lots of stores but I feel a bit overwhelmed when I visit, wander around and leave vowing to wear jeans and fleeces for the rest of my life.

What I wear now:
Jeans and fleeces are my happiest outfit and perfect for sorting out the chickens and walking the dog.
Work items which tend to be smart grey trousers with a variety of tops (I'm flinching reading this at how boring I am)
Jeans-any that bloody fit! Currently M&S dark pair best fit and I love them.
I'm a bit of a hermit (not really, but between working full time and 3 children I don't have much me time to socialises I have got away with crap wardrobe)

I'm tall, so trousers in ordinary shops are often too short or limited in availability (M&S are v good with long)

I'm curvy but not petite (wouldn't call myself fat though) -skinny jeans are not for me...

What shops should I aim for, bearing in mind that I'm not ready to dress as a pensioner but I really cannot wear clothes meant for 30yr olds.

Everyone is different. Sorry to hear about your mum's health, but my mum is 86 , a trim 10-12, and buys all her clothes from High St- inc the dreaded Per Una, East, M&S, and so on. She wears tailored trousers and nice knitwear, dresses, and skirts and tops. There's no way she'd be called an 'edgy' dresser, but she always looks very smart.

Though that should be [shamefaced].

My mother is a handful of years younger. (Than missbopeeps'...) She's not allowed into Per Una. I mentioned elsewhere that she has some things from Helmut Lang (which look fabulous on her,) and killed the thread stone dead.

I wish I did not feel so strongly that people should be able to dress well until they lie down and die - it's the only part of Mnet where I find myself severely burned. I'm not interested in listing which Gucci bag I'm wearing today, so Mn Vogue is closed to me, but it does seem there is some code on S and B that I'm missing. Why do we all have to shop from a prescribed list of High Street stores?

we don't SY- but can you say what the other options are?

I live SE in a fairly affluent area, and tbh, my small town has a handful of 'boutiques' where the stock is just dire and the prices crazily high.

If you are anti High Street, where do you advise we shop and why?

I shop from the High Street because it is affordable and easy to access.

I am another country dweller, pushing 50 with a really outdoors lifestyle, 3 dogs, horses to muck out, rural derbyshire.

The ONLY clothes that work well in here winter - think lots of rain, mud high winds, snow - are really good quality outdoor black trousers from Marmot etc, fleeces, lots of windstopper and goretex and really good boots. My biggest extravagance last year was a beautiful purple RAB down jacket.

High end outdoor shops are my friend. I have a couple of pairs of PRANA trousers - designed for climbers- smart, amazingly stretchy, quick drying and indestructable - much better than jeans.

Vintage coats, jumpers etc, get damp, and smell.

My tip. Good hats, scalves, a bit of makeup, accessories and do my hair.

And learning not too care too much

What shops should I aim for, bearing in mind that I'm not ready to dress as a pensioner but I really cannot wear clothes meant for 30yr olds.

OP I think you will have gathered from my hijack of your thread that you should be aiming to look even more wonderful when you reach pensionable age than you do now. So it's best to plan ahead....

Years ago in another life I lived half the time in deep country and half in the City. It didn't take long to realise I needed two separate wardrobes - when I wore my City clothes in the country people actually laughed. (I think it was kindly meant...) For outdoors I graduated to the sort of things elastamum describes. But one can't be outside all the time. And I never felt happy in a polo shirt and jeans. So I experimented with the things I've described above. (Velvet and tweed don't smell indoors... )

I am miserly with my clothes budget. £120 spent on an item in Top Shop seems fiercely expensive. If I find something lovely online (that I've been stalking for months...) reduced from £500 to £120 I pretty much run through the streets shouting about my bargain. But I don't think it's easy to shop online unless you already have a clear idea of what suits and what fits. This is why trying on stuff in the very best shops you can find is absolutely necessary. (I'm always amazed reading here of people ordering masses and sending masses back. I don't have the time or the money or the energy for that....)

Rambling... Shop for what you'd like to see in the mirror in ten years time.

But SY you still haven't said why you dislike High St and what the other options are

Unless you are talking designer labels- because few High St shops have clothes for £500.

I think it is quicker to order clothes online, try them on at home and then go to the post office to return them than it is to have to drive to the shops and go to all the shops and try the clothes on there especially if they don't have the colour or size that you want in.

Oh missbo I thought I'd said everything... (Although I'm fairly sure I didn't say I completely abjure the high street!)

On another thread people objected when I used the word "quality" (as if it was quite, quite wrong to want to try to get the best for one's money.)

The OP wanted help with clothes shopping. The high street is the worst place for making mistakes and wasting your money on things that will be in the bin in six months. Of course you can buy wonderful things as well - but why send the OP to a place where she feels "overwhelmed"? I live within reach of a Selfridges and a House of Fraser - and I never feel overwhelmed in Selfridges.....

I'm sorry I can't give a comprehensive list of non high street shops. I have no idea where the OP is. I merely suggest that it might be worth trying a different approach.

Hmmm....

I think it's a bit narrow minded and snobby to suggest that everything from the High St ends up in the bin in 6 months! My clothes don't because I take care of them and don't wear them out.

I bought a coat at Jigsaw that was almost £300 and it's going to last me years. And clothes from places like The White Company are now- with careful hand washing or wool cycle machine washing- into their 3rd season and still looking good.

I much prefer mail order because I like to try clothes on at home with the shoes or other clothing it will be worn with, and it's easier to do that and return ( as long as that's free) than buy in a store, take your clothes off and on all day, lug it all home, find you don't really like it then have to make another expensive ( fuel or fares) trip back within 28 days.

I don't think it's accessing clothes that is the issue for the OP it's getting out of her clothes 'rut' and how she sees herself that is the problem.

I'm really grateful to everyone for your posts. Lots of 'leads' I have been looking online and decided it's me that needs an overhaul mentally as I just cannot imagine wearing any of the clothes. I'm too comfortable as I am and frightened to experiment. I might try the personal shopper route to start me off.

I like internet shopping and I love John Lewis!
I also love finding little boutiques that stock mire quirky individual labels like Sandwich,Diverse,Noa Noa,Avoca etc to mix with mire mainstream stuff.
Often country towns great for these sorts if shops,I've found things in places such as Ashbourne,Tarporley,Nantwich,Truro,Holt,Ludlow,Dorchester,etc etc!!

Hen
if you are stuck in a rut why not try buying just one item that you wouldn't normally wear and take the plunge? It might be a pair of skinny cords, or a gillet/padded jacket thingy or a parka, or down jacket- a couple of nice scarves, or even a jumper in a colour or style you don't normally wear?

It's also worth looking now and then in some of the women's mags for ideas- mags aimed at our age such as Good Housekeeping and Woman & Home, and maybe Prima. Sometimes the fashions are too smart for my personal lifestyle but there is usually a 'make over' of a reader which is useful at times just for getting ideas.

I would second the personal shopper in JL. The lovely autumn clothes are in the shops now. Write down all the good ideas from this thread "I've been recommended to try cords, layered knitwear, scarfs etc" and explain that you still need to be able to walk the dog etc but just to look a bit more put together and co-ordinated. If they don't come up with anything you like you don't have to buy it.

Also worth adding that NOW is a good time to buy- nice items get snapped up and I like to have bought 90% of my winter stuff by end of Sept. Stores usually don't get much new stuff in after that- though some do like to stagger their stock- like the White Company and White Stuff- so I hold off a bit with them unless I see something I love.