Please help, Shoes for 11yr old DD's party before I tear my hair out, and possibly hers too.

[NettoSuperstar]

DD's end of Primary party is this month, she wanted to wear her nasty old leggings/joggers and crap t-shirt.
I've managed to talk her out of that and into this dress
She needs shoes though, and is declaring sandals of any sort are not cool and she must have some clumpy lace up heeled things.
She'll look silly in them, please help me find something that matches the dress, and is not naf
(Apparently I don't know because I was born an old lady)

My DD is in y6 too and I would be quite surprised to see that dress on any of her classmates - looks v grown up, though lovely. Will it stay up and is she comfortable in a strapless dress? Anyway re shoes the model is wearing it with red converse which I think looks fab so if that was the sort of thing my DD wanted to team it with I would let her.

I was going to say converse too (or some imitations) Very cool.

Honestly? Converse boots or dm's in a colour or Urchin style ones.

Think Lilly Allen.

I would say that dress is for an adult not a child.

But yes, the Converse need to be worn with it.

She looks lovely in it, and yes, it does stay up!
I've worn it too to check, we are the same size.

Anyway, yes, I know the model is in red converse, I own them, but she wants shoes.

Oh shit, now I'm worried.
It just looks like a sundress on, I think?
I actually thought it would be less grown up than some of the dresses being bought.
There will be a cropped cardi too.

Could anyone link me to some dresses please?
I'm not sure what I should be looking for

It's a lovely dress but too adult and too casual, I fear!

She is 11. Why can't she choose her own shoes providing they are not high stripper heels and are within your budget?

You could stipulate that the ones she chooses must be something she will wear again rather than waste your money on a one off pair.

When my daughter was 11 she chose everything for her Prom (school disco!) and all I said was that she couldn't have too high heels. She agreed and chose a low ish heel hight.

Some of her friends were getting very upset in the build up to the event and were in tears as their mothers were choosing what they were wearing as if they were living through their child. On the day one girl turned up in a hideous dress crying her eyes out and another girl turned up wearing black skinny jeans and her mum crying saying how the daughter refused to wear the 'lovely' dress she had chosen for her.

We all want our children to look nice but putting pressure on for social events can cause tears and upset on both sides.

The white dress will look cute if teamed with flats or converse.

My daughter also has her party coming up and has got a nice pair of wedges from the kids section in Next. She's a size 4 but they unto a 5 I think. Both pairs would look lovely with that dress.
www.next.co.uk/x513696s4
www.next.co.uk/x513696s7

Hope that helps.

They were my 1st links and they worked!!!!
Things technical never work for me

It's true. She should really be allowed to choose for herself, given she stays within reasonable, defined boundaries of style, decency and budget.

Is she happy with the dress herself?

WE had a good look around for DDs outfit. She's quite small so had to stick to children's departments. In the end she asked to look in Hollister ( somewhere I have refused to let her into until now). She chose a pretty chiffon skirt which she's teaming with a mint green vest and brown tan belt ( when I find one to fit). SHe loves it and feels very grown up and fashionable in it. Actually it was lovely to see her growing into such a lovely young woman even if she still feels so young to me.
She will wear the skirt to death later with leggings and her Docs.

Looks very grown up to me. It's cut for an adult in the'chest' area!
Is she comfortable in it?
If she won't wear converse or sandals then ballet pumps.?

Let her wear what she wants! It's her party, at her school, with her friends, she should wear that makes her comfortable (as long as it's not hotpants and a bra or something).

Those skirts look really nice dizzymac.

Thanks. She does look lovely in it and the plain vest makes it just right for her age, in my opinion.
I can't believe she's off to high school

dizzy, I cannot believe DS1 has finished high school and is now in the middle of GCSE'S . It flies by I tell you once they move up.

OP, is this about you or her?

Why couldn't she wear leggings if that's what she wanted? It doesn't sound like she wanted to wear a dress in the first place. The dress is totally unsuitable for an 11 year old child.

What do you mean 'some of the dresses being bought'? By her classmates?

Totally agree that she should wear what she likes within reason, even if you don't like it.

Sorry.

I feel old just thinking about it! DS is only 3 though so it will be a while before he gets there. I'm sure jeans and t shirt will be the order of the day when he goes to his leaver's party.

She loves the dress, it's not particularly low cut and there will be a cardi.
Is it just the lack of straps that's making it adult?
I'm really just seeing a white sundress.
Anyway, I had in mind silver ballet flats or gladiator sandals, but she wants these
Now, in theory, for a party I have no problem with them, but I know my DD and I know she'll feel out of place when she realises they don't go and everyone else has what I had suggested, which is why I talked her into the dress, she'd have been really upset at being the only one not dressed up.

I think the dress is lovely, my DD and her friends wore very similar things to their Y6 leavers' party last year. Would a pair of Toms work (you can looky-like versions in New Look and Sainsburys)? DD has a silver crochet pair that seem to work with everything, everywhere.

Ooh, I've found these Converse
I think she might go for them as she loves Converse, I'd said she could have a pair anyway as she's always wearing mine.

Well, the party was on Wednesday night, DD wore the dress and a pair of my heels.
I did buy her the converse, she took them to change into when her feet hurt, but managed the whole two and a half hours dancing in them.
I'm impressed!

She was thrilled with her outfit and looked lovely.