Understatedly sexy for day-to-day

[TeamJesse]

How? What sort of outfit would that mean to you? I'm (obviously) not talking high heels and plunging necklines, and I don't mean looking knockout every day either, rather moving away from jeans and verging-on-studenty outfits into grown-up, wearable subtlety - for a SAHM, not office wear.

Any ideas?!

Bugger, I'm destined to be podgy and frumpy aren't I?

A leather jacket. A new shorter and foxy hair cut.

SkinheadMermaid Totally agree. I adore the colours in Mint Velvet but I look as sexy as a sack of spuds in slouchy stuff.

Sexy is very subjective, I don't think you can give a prescription to dress in certain things and the wearer will immediately be sexy! There's also a difference between feeling sexy yourself and others finding you sexy .

IMO it is about being comfortable and confident in your own skin and clothes. Being interested in other people and having a great sense of humour. Good grooming - clean hair, well kept nails and skin and clothes that flatter your figure and colouring all help but there will always be exceptions, some people ooze sexy even if grungily dressed and smelly!

If you are looking for a "style" OP, have you tried searching on pinterest or just starting your own board of looks you like, pinning pics of celebs or items of clothes/hair/accessories etc that you think look good and may fit into your lifestyle? You will probably see a theme emerging and can adapt it to suit you.

Interesting answers! I'd also like to see some links. I don't actually want to look sexy every day but I was interested in what sexy dressing would be when not evening wear / going for a date or whatever; and occasionally I go and meet dh for lunch and wouldn't mind looking a bit - in a very subtle way, you understand - sexy. But still myself.

Agree that confidence plays a role. Also polished nails and general good grooming. I think a lot of it is attitude. I agree with MadBusLady about pencil skirt, smudgy eyeliner, hair loosely/messily up. Pencil skirt doesn't really work for SAHM but the hair and eyeliner would.

A friend of mine often shows slightly more cleavage than strictly necessary, often has a flash of a lacy (usually coloured) bra showing, always wears fitted clothes (tight trousers, stretch shirt). She does look sexy but it's a little too obvious. I'm interested in some nonchalant sort of sexiness, I suppose. But as lots of you have said already, it's probably mostly attitude anyway.

It's an aura....a lot of French women have it damm them
Agree with Sleep the just-got-out-of-bed look works for some , not for others. Think it's to do with confidence.
For me...I'd say keep it simple ,wear tailored clothes that fit properly and don't hide your body, grooming goes a long way not fake anything though, subtle perfume every day.

Silky drapey tops... What's your budget? Donna Karan I think does gorgeous understated stuff but you're talking thousands - at the other end of the scale, I've got good pieces from Zara and Warehouse, believe it or not...

Depends on your figure I guess, are there any celeb's whose style you admire? To me Cameron Diaz, Gwyneth Paltrow, Beyonce, Danni Minogue, Whitney Port etc are all sexy yet hav v.different style. There are two blogs I really like for style, one called 'buy now blog later' and the other 'cupcakes and cashmere'. Mostly out of my price range but great inspiRation.

I have never met a man who likes or thinks ballet shoes are sexy!

Deportment is key to looking sexy so if you walk like a gorilla it will kill any outfit immediately!

Sexy on one woman will not be sexy on another. Nigella lawson can look sexy but she has a completely different figure to mine and I would look matronly in her clothes!

Vanessa Paradis always looks sexy to me so I sometimes look t what she is wearing.

Vogue have a style file section where you can choose a celebrity and see their style

www.vogue.co.uk/topic/style-file

Sadly one direction are on there, but just ignore that section! Ha!

I agree about the ballet shoes Sunday - I love them but there's no way dh thinks they're sexy.

I'm slim and have more of a boyish/gamine look, which is fine, I like it - but not conducive to being nonchalantly sexy! I can wear a great dress and heels on a night out, but in my sahm life would struggle to put something together that might have a small suggestion of sexiness to it.

Gosh, I'd have said you've got the best figure for nonchalant sexiness! I'd love to be able to drift around in skinny jeans and floaty tops and do the whole sexy collarbones and wrists thing like gamine people can. I am an hour-glass, stunning in a wiggle dress, so-so in everything else.

It had never occurred to me that collarbones and wrists can be sexy! I see women with hour glass figures like yours, lovely curvy bosoms, and always feel a bit awestruck. If I tried to show a bit of cleavage, everyone would look away and feel slightly embarrassed for me.

Nonchalant sexiness for me is an outfit that is generally quite casual with an element of sexiness or formality to it

sexy skirt and everyday jumper.

Not a fan of real fur but you get the idea

monochrome

I think this works when getting glammed up too, just up the sexiness one little notch. Someone said 'Wear you fur coat like a cloth one and a cloth like your fur'.

Yes, those are good examples - and I agree; the relaxed outfit with an unexpected bit of sexiness (tight skirt / split / high heels) does the trick.