I want to feel more feminine

[erowid]

I've never been a girly girl, I've never followed any fashions and always dress for practicality. I don't want to change my style dramatically but I want to feel more feminine with my appearance.

I don't own a single dress or skirt and I haven't worn make-up for about 2 years and can't remember the last time I went to hairdressers (I cut my own hair). I have never worn heels (dodgy ankle) and the only jewellery I wear is a pair of small silver hoop earrings. My wardrobe consists of 6 pairs of jeans, about 2 dozen t-shirts/simple tops, a cardigan and 2 hoodies, a pair of Doc Martin boots, a pair of walking boots and 1 pair of converse trainers.

I work from home, spend a lot of time at my allotment and very rarely do I ever go on an evening out. Which is probably why I buy clothes for practicality rather than appearance.

I fear I've become stuck in a rather 'unkept look' and a friend even mentioned how much I reminded her of Barbara from The Good Life. (I took it light heartedly but I am only 27!)

I'm trying to think of ways I can slowly start bringing back the little things that I can wear to make me feel more feminine but I don't want anything so dramatic that I feel uncomfortable (for example a skirt is out of the question but I casual jewellery or a hair flower wouldn't be)

Does anyone have any suggestions?

Well if you look like Barbara from the good life youre doing alright!!

How about a gentle move towards blouses?? There are loads around now, lovely drapey floaty ones, and smocky cotton ones. You obviously don't want or require dressy clothes but there are lots of blouses around in the the shops that are very casual and look great with jeans.

And then maybe a move away from the hoodies towards some sort of casual jacket. Maybe a soft cotton or jersey type blazer, so still a casual look with jeans but a little more put together and not quite so simply functional - but still practical.

If you go with floaty/smocky blouses you can then get some jewellery to go with this: longer beady earrings, chunky braclets etc.

Then maybe book a hairdressers appointment, or are you happy with your hair? Need more info.....

Oh my hair is just a mess. My hair is really fine after the years of dying it but I stopped that about a year ago and switched to henna which has helped. I can never get any volume and its always dead straight. I had a perm 6 years ago which only lasted 2 months because my hair doesn't seem to want to hold any curls. To top it all off it gets greasy really quickly and even cutting the conditioner and products didn't seem to help. So I just gave up trying to put any effort into it.

I would love a really short/easy to manage pixie cut but I'm overweight and have a round face and I'm not convinced it would suit me at all. A trip to the hairdressers might be in order.

I'm not keen on the idea of floaty blouses but I will try one next time I'm in town to see how it feels. But I do like the idea of casual blazer thanks!

Would you feel more comfortable if we called them shirts?

You don't have to do floaty, you can do crinkle type shirts, Boden always do a variation of this and Next have some in, or a linen type shirt that is casual but stylish. White Company always have variations of these in.

When it's cold you can wear long sleeve tops under them.

There is a thread ongoing on here in style and Beauty abut Jersey Blazers so maybe have a look at that for inspiration.

I too work from home and tend to mostly venture out to do gardening or walk the dog. Our house is cold so I tend to wear something smart and then when in the house orout with the dog I'll put a fleece over the top, then when I'm going anywhere I'll be seen, even the shop or to pick the kids up, I take off my hoodie and put on a jacket or coat. I love and need my fleeces but they are purely for in the house or activities where I won't really be seen.

It's sounds like you used to make an effort, but that has slowly been eroded to the point of non existence. I think you definitely need to go the hairdressers. Ask for recommendations for a good haitdresser that will give you time to discuss, and then discuss with the stylist how you've lost your way and ask for thier opinion.

Maybe just try that pixie cut? What's the worse can happen, it's doesn't suit you and you can grow it, at least you'll be trying something.

You're right, I used to make an effort but slowly over the years I've just retreaded into what is comfy rather than what is presentable.

Another reason why I don't think the pixie cut will suit me just yet is because the t-shirt/jeans and short hairdo will make me look butch. Right now the only thing that makes me feel feminine is that fact that I have long hair.

Maybe I should start with something small like painting my nails or something.

Swap your laces in your doc martins laces for a coloured ribbon? Mine have extra long ribbons that i tigh around the ankel and put in a bow. I to work from home and live at the allotment with the dog when its not snowing. I live in dms or wellies with skinny jeans or mens jeans or leggens and a denim shirt. Normally i choose a floaty scarf and put on eye liner some times a few bobbie pins in my hair but to be honest i to love pixie hair ;-). Start with the ribbon maybe a scarf.or Maybe buy some spagettie tops and cut the neck seam off a tshirt so it more openfemine i do that all the time with mens t shirts that i like on sale.

What about some very light make up? If you have a naturally casual look maybe just make up your eyes a tiny bit. Depending on your hair and skin colour a neutral eye shadow and a little mascara will make your eyes stand out nicely.

Mega easy to apply and will last all day.

I've got an allotment and it's easy to become very unstylish.. I decided to pretend I'm in the riding set, and also copied Monty Don's classic style... I raided the charity shops and now wear Brora corduroys with Puffa gilet, or tweed jacket, big scarf, proper hat.. Bid for good wellies on eBay perhaps?

Hiya, we have a thread running at the mo in S&B called Fabulizers, why not join us?

my new year resolution was to make more effort etc.

Oh byanymeans, the ribbon thing is exactly the kind of thing I was thinking of and I love the idea of cutting open the neck of a t-shirt.

I think accessories and a little make-up might be a good starting point and just need to remind myself to actually do it on a daily basis! I'll take a look at that Fabulizers thread thanks!